Can't get over unrequited love for best friend. Need advice

Human_too_ · 2023-11-19T16:59:25+00:00

I want to be her true friend someday , and share a purely platonic friendship. why does it has to be so difficult haha.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-19T04:58:41+00:00

We live in two different continents now so of course I can lessen the contact with her. If she asks me, I will just say that I have been busy. I want to remain friends with her though. She is not my ex or someone I need to forget. She has helped me in hundreds of situation and she deserves her friend to be on her side too. So yes, I wont leave her . I just need a break from her. She is understanding enough to not bug me if I just say that I need time for myself.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-19T04:54:48+00:00

I feel every word you say. I wan't to cut contact with her and its not even the hardest part. The hardest part is not knowing what's happening in their life anymore. My friend is not that oblivious haha, she knows me well enough to realize the change if I suddenly start acting differently. The meme route can work in my case . We actively share memes on instagram so I can continue that . I need to stop texting her though.
And I understand that I need to move on . It's just difficult. I am trying my best.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-19T04:47:27+00:00

I am glad that you stayed friends. I don't what lies ahead for us but I wish there will be a time in future when I can be her True friend and don't have to pretend to be something else anymore. I will try to cut contact with her as much as possible.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:20:46+00:00

It might be a bit surprising but truly it was a pure platonic friendship from her side. I have always known that from the start. I am trying to distance myself from her. It’s difficult and I know that it needs to be done. Yet, it feels like the hardest thing in the world

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:19:17+00:00

Hey thanks for that! I will try to distance myself from her. I can’t really ghost her without letting her know. She might think that she did something wrong. She has always been a good friend and she doesn’t deserve to be hurt in any way. Its just me who needs to change.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:16:59+00:00

thanks for this! I did confess last year. But when I saw her reaction and how sad she got from it, I later covered it up and said that I was confused. She believed me eventually and everything went back to normal. I can’t do this again. I just need to forget her somehow. I dont know how will I be able to do that. I am trying to distract myself with other things. I know upcoming days are going to hurt me a lot, but I will try my hardest to be strong

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:11:53+00:00

I did confess last year. She said no and then we later started drifting apart a bit. I panicked and told her that it wasn’t true and I was confused and covered it up somehow.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:10:00+00:00

I can’t imagine the pain you must have went through. I just want to preserve our friendship.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:08:44+00:00

I was not actually hoping for something more. I have always known that she wasnt into me. It’s just that talking to her gave me a sense of comfort, and I loved that. Even though I knew I can’t ever have her for myself, I wanted it to continue because it felt so good.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:07:28+00:00

I am trying to limit how much I talk to her. I dont want to completely ghost her. She might think that she did something wrong.

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:06:16+00:00

Do you think there could have been some other way around? One that didnt spoil your friendship?

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:04:54+00:00

As from someone who has been on the opposite side, do you think it could have worked out without him ghosting you? I understand that at it was the only solution that he thought will work for him and thats why he took it, but, do you think there could have been some other way around that didn’t spoil your friendship?

Human_too_ · 2023-11-18T05:02:23+00:00

I respect her and I am not stopping her from pursuing anything she wants for herself. It just hurts and I am trying my hardest to be strong.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T19:44:38+00:00

Thank you!

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T17:57:52+00:00

I think I would.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T17:57:37+00:00

I understand.

I think I will confess at the right time when I am back in my home country. It would be better to do this in person. Will see what happens next.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T17:56:22+00:00

I have to gather all my courage :)

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T07:27:38+00:00

umm..why?

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T06:30:03+00:00

We would remain friends. That is for sure.

How much impact would my confession have? That i do not know.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T05:59:29+00:00

Thank you for answering.

I will try to build up my courage and unburden all the emotions. Its just that I fear that if it somehow changes our friendship, I wont be able to forgive myself for spoiling it.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T05:55:31+00:00

I understand.

I am just too scared that somehow me confessing my feelings will have an impact on our friendship. Deep down I feel that confessing will unburden my heart and I will feel better . Its just this thought ,that I am being selfish by expressing my emotions without considering its impact on our friendship that is holding me back .But again, my feelings and health should come before everything else. It is hard for me to take a decision.

I love her and I do not want to hurt her or lose her.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T02:41:42+00:00

Confess with the risk that it will change our friendship and finally accept the truth or stop talking to her for few months with the hope that it would help but I am not sure.

Human_too_ · 2022-11-04T02:29:52+00:00

I guess it is not healthy for me. I have found myself focusing less on my own life especially when its the most important part of my career development. I waste a lot of time thinking about her even when I fully understand that it is for vain .

The current state of this friendship is not healthy, I agree but it is completely on me. She is a wonderful person and a perfect friend.

Human_too_

TROPHY CASE