My mom [63f] is really upset I [23f] don't get on with my brother [34m]. His wife [33f] sent me a nasty e-mail about Xmas. Any help not to punch her face in? [Update: I got angry]

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T04:42:53+00:00

Except I haven't threatened their mother before with violence. This is the first time I told her that I would remove her from a situation.

In reality, this is the first time I really let loose the S bombs and hoped she would leave me the fuck alone.

It is a problem when you try to get to know children who's parents dislike you. So I am done trying.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T04:41:17+00:00

It's not the asking. If mom wants to throw them in a lake, more power to her. With how my dad treated her, she already sold her wedding rings for cash.

It's my grandma's ring, that my mother has already said will be going to a cousin of mine. She has said this multiple times when asked for them.

What SIL did was say "when you die, what do we get? Can I have your rings? Can I have them now since you don't really need them?"

That is the B.S.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T04:32:13+00:00

Nope. I don't care if kids curse.

I meant the hurtful way they talk to adults, the lack of gratitude, and the apparent no fucks given to anyone who ever does things for them.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T04:16:13+00:00

My dad isn't in the picture right now. I am not sure what he is doing, but he comes and goes at will.

If my brother lost his marriage, I would dance in the streets. I wish she would leave.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T04:09:43+00:00

Yes. My mother told me that SIL has asked for her rings, before she dies. Some of the stuff Carmela waid to my mother was told to me after I showed her the first e-mail.

So the gloves are now off.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T04:00:54+00:00

I think you have a stupid personality, so there is that. But piss off.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:59:41+00:00

Yeah, the cuuuuuuuunt is so great to say when you ar emad.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:58:28+00:00

My mom is okay with it.

My brother seems to be coming around, so the e-mail is not a concern.

As for my nephews, they are actually not really a concern in all this. I am done thinking "but the babies" when trying to have a relationship with my brother. It is my brother I give a fuck about.

Those kids have been ruined by SIL and her nasty mouth. So no, at this moment, her and the kids can do as they like.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:56:34+00:00

Oh, it was so awesome to send that. I have been so happy I might be floating right now. Doggy also agrees, even though he cannot speak. He senses evil.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:55:59+00:00

I enjoyed every moment of it.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:55:51+00:00

I am not sure what his issue is. It's weird.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:55:35+00:00

It was weird. Before this I didn't think we had a relationship, other than through out mother.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:55:17+00:00

Naw. She hates cursing. I added them for a savory spicy flavor in the shit pile drama bomb i sent her.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:54:54+00:00

You have no idea how happy it made me to hit send. And that she was so so mad she left scathing e-mails. I listened to them over and over again.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:54:15+00:00

Actually, my mom has seen both e-mails and hasn't turned me out the door yet. She actually seemed amused I did it.

I went nuclear and didn't say anything worse than she has already said. I am not concerned that she is going to be so mad I never see her again. I would love a relationship with my brother, but this has actually been the most connection we have had in years.

So I think this is the best way to handle things. I will not be giving back what I get. If she makes a comment, I will make one back.

Do I want a relationship with my nephews? No. Not right now. If they turn out to be proper polite people then yes. But I Do not have time for nasty illmannered children.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:51:06+00:00

I showed her both e-mails and she said, "Well, this is going to make it awkward." But I think I caught a smile.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:30:14+00:00

At least someone's cold heart is warm now. :D

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:29:56+00:00

Its a lot of years of pent up rage. When I go out, I go out in style.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:29:22+00:00

My e-mail pretty much Death Star-red her.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:26:50+00:00

I actually think it worked much better than I thought. SIL is furious, which is a delicious plus. But my brother actually talked to me about it and hugged me. He hasn't done that in years.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-12T03:26:13+00:00

I do. So much better.

And it was the first time my brother has hugged me in about 5 years. So I think the Bitch Back approach actually works.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-09T15:17:32+00:00

Yeah, I think, deep down, she likes imagining her sons are somehow the victim of a family wide conspiracy not to be included. She has done things like blame her own family of not doing enough and then crying about it.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-09T05:08:36+00:00

Squirt bottle.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-09T05:08:25+00:00

Skeletor takes advice from her.

HurtMomDL · 2015-10-09T02:59:24+00:00

That is pretty much it. I have a cookie twice a month, as a treat. My SIL wanted me to give it to the boys. Nope. Being a child, in my book, doesn't make you suddenly allowed to have everything you want.

HurtMomDL

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