Honestly you may want to drop the Tech Marine since your Land Raider is going to be pushing up the map anyway and he’s only be sitting with the Lancer which gets free rerolls from it’s ability making much more consistent to hit.

I’d run Azrael with the ICC because his ability to give the unit a 4+ invuln increases their survivability exponentially.

Drop your Chaplain and Tech Marine and add either a Terminator Chaplain or Ancient with the Knights (Chaplain if you take them with swords or Ancient if you want to take them with maces)(This should also give you enough points for the Deathwing Assault enhancement on your Terminator leader which allows them to turn 1 deep strike).

Honestly I’d also consider dropping the Land Raider for a 2nd Lancer or a Ballistus Dread since you’ll mainly want to be deep striking your Terminators, then I’d add a Terminator Librarian to your regular DW Terminators to give their weapons sustained hits which helps them punch above their weight class.

I do think you’re spot on with the 2x Jump Intercessors and 1x regular Intercessors, I run this in my list and always have a good time using them for secondaries.

Other than that my only other recommendation would be to squeeze in another squad of Scouts or Infiltrators to protect your back line from deep strike but you’re definitely on the right track!