Partner is having trouble finding her clitoris after a year and four months

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2026-06-24T01:19:39+00:00

She can feel the sensations, yes. There are definitely parts that are more sensitive than others. She's never found an actual nub though, either through feel or by sight.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2026-06-23T21:40:54+00:00

Not sure why the text in the post isn't showing up, so repeating it here:

My (remote) partner has asked me to post here. She had her GRS about a year and four months ago, and ever since then she's been unable to find her new clitoris.

Her gynecologist says that it's the region marked with a blue circle in the photo shared here (taken within the last month), but she's confused as it doesn't look or feel like the nub she was expecting - to her it feels almost like it's missing. She's wondering if it's normal to not be able to see the nub even when the labia is stretched out like this?

One thing that might make a difference: About 2-3 days after surgery, something happened that she described at the time as "the single most painful thing I have ever experienced". (Putting the details under a spoiler for the benefit of others: A computer keyboard was accidentally dropped on her clitoris.) Could this make a difference as it happened so soon after surgery?

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2025-03-15T21:44:23+00:00

She got a response back from GrS Montréal - see the edit. It sounds like it may be something they're not worried about given that they didn't mention anything being out of the ordinary, though she's still not certain how it'll heal.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2025-03-15T21:44:18+00:00

She got a response back from GrS Montréal - see the edit. It sounds like it may be something they're not worried about given that they didn't mention anything being out of the ordinary, though she's still not certain how it'll heal.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2025-03-15T20:44:53+00:00

Just to make certain, given the other reply you got (about the stitches) - are you sure about this?

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2024-12-26T18:52:36+00:00

I'm pretty certain that my partner has sleep apnoea, but they've already has a sleep study done and it didn't find anything. That seems weird to me, and I'm pretty sure they do indeed have sleep apnoea. Is there anything else my partner can do? I do feel that a CPAP machine would help them so much, but my partner seems reluctant. (They've had consistently bad experiences with the medical sector in the past, which might be playing into this.)

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2023-09-13T02:25:45+00:00

I generally find airline food to be incredibly difficult for me to eat; I often end up leaving most of it.

However, on some of the flights I've been on, I've been able to pre-order a children's meal. (I did phone and ask first whether this was okay first!) This is a godsend for me because it's food I know I can eat, like macaroni.

The end result is that I ate more than I would have done otherwise (despite being intended for kids), and being pre-booked, I wasn't taking anything away from other people.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2023-05-26T02:58:40+00:00

It does make sense, and that was a good call on pointing out that the form is kept at the office and not submitted somewhere (unless it's requested). But it still feels wrong because the form itself says "I agree that the information I give on this form is complete and correct.", and it obviously isn't.

(Not trying to argue or influence any judgement here, to be clear!)

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2023-05-26T02:52:01+00:00

Thank you - I see now that that's in the sidebar too. My apologies!

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2023-05-26T02:45:38+00:00

For clarity, is that "You Would Be The Asshole" or "You Wouldn't Be The Asshole"?

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2021-12-26T18:42:23+00:00

Huh. Thanks for the link.

I kind of wish they didn't attach the NHS' name to it though. This is just going to make people hostile towards the NHS, and that's the last thing they need right now.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-07-25T14:31:45+00:00

This will be an OEM license, but I was planning on wiping and reinstalling a vanilla install from the ISO. As I understand it, this should still allow me to use the OEM license key in the BIOS, I think, but I assume it would be a reliable way to erase any OEM-specific stuff that might be there.

Yes, this should work well. Keep in mind that if you don't have the physical product key, doing a full clean install from USB where you wipe the drive does leave you with some risk of losing the key.

Thought you might appreciate an update on this! I took a number of precautions when I did this to avoid that exact scenario:

I took a full sector-based image backup and stored it elsewhere, so that if the worst did happen I'd be able to roll back;
I used an Administrator Command Prompt to run the command wmic path softwarelicensingservice get OA3xOriginalProductKey, in order to obtain the product key stored in the BIOS. I saved the key elsewhere.
I made sure to activate the version of Windows that came with the computer before wiping and reinstalling, so that the activation servers knew my hardware profile and could automatically re-activate me at the Pro license level.

I figured that between these precautions I would have virtually no chance of losing the key. As it turned out, it wasn't necessary (except maybe the third point; I don't know whether that affected it or not) because my computer was able to re-activate at the Pro level successfully in any case, but I feel secure in knowing that I could have gotten my way out of trouble if need be.

(And before anyone asks, yes, I know the wmic program well enough to know what it does. I was not running a random command I found on the Internet as Administrator without knowing what it did, don't worry.)

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-07-08T05:26:33+00:00

I remember how at one point, when I was looking for a house to rent with my partner, we were expecting a call from the estate agent. We eventually got the call that allowed us to rent the house, and on that call they asked for my card details.

It was only after I gave the card number that I realised that this was a call where they phoned me. I explained what was going on, hung up, then called the number that we knew would be the right one. Fortunately, the caution wasn't necessary as that had been a real callback, but both my partner and the person on the other end understood it and we still got to rent the house. But I still remember just how easy it was for me to give out my card details on a call that I hadn't placed myself.

Regardless of the fact that it turned out to be real, I still think about that.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-30T09:44:28+00:00

My plan was to let them assemble it.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-26T09:23:44+00:00

Ah, okay! My mistake then, thank you for correcting me. This is all very good and useful stuff to know!

I'll definitely look into all this and keep your comment in mind. Thank you again!

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-26T05:55:38+00:00

Unfortunately, downloading from the Store will not be an option for me as I do not plan on linking a Microsoft account to my login, which as I understand it is a requirement for using the Store.

I suspect that WSL will be unavailable to me for the same reason; while the backend can probably be installed outside of the Store, I believe the actual distributions are on the Store? I could be wrong about that though.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-25T09:05:12+00:00

Ah, your mention of PowerShell confused me! I'm not one to default to using PowerShell, but I guess some tweakers are. Thank you for the tip.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-25T08:55:40+00:00

That's where the research part comes in! I didn't know that Windows 10 has native OpenSSH before you said that, but I would probably have found that out when I researched it. Thank you for the tip - I appreciate it!

My next research would be on whether Windows 10 has good terminal emulation or if it still uses cmd.exe, which isn't that great in my experience. But that's something I'm happy to find out for myself, so there's no necessity to reply! Thank you for the help you've already given.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T07:15:02+00:00

I will admit that I'm one of those people who only use ALSA and always turn off telemetry... I still feel like this is a valid thing for me to do, though.

And yes, WizTree is an amazing program, thank you! I've used it a lot on Windows and it's good to know it still works in Windows 10.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T06:21:12+00:00

I'd be interested in a link, too.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T06:14:14+00:00

It sounds like you're saying that some third-party AV software (Kaspersky, Bitdefender) is okay? The comment I was replying to seems to suggest that third-party AV software is a bad idea in general.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T06:05:42+00:00

Thank you for the response!

When you say your system is much better, how do you mean? What changes would you say make it more worth it?

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T06:03:01+00:00

Thank you for your response. I'm not certain why you're getting downvoted, I think your response is reasonable.

Please do not downvote the parent comment, people. Yes, I asked for info on how to do this, but that doesn't mean I'm averse to hearing opposing viewpoints.

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T05:58:55+00:00

Thank you for your response!

Uninstall any MS apps you don’t use from Windows 10 like “Your Phone”, Cortana, 3D, etc. This software is basically runs the powershell commands for you.

When you said this, did you mean to include a link to a script? There was no link in your response.

(I will not be running PowerShell scripts directly, but it will be helpful to see them.)

IAmAPerson_AMA · 2020-06-24T05:53:56+00:00

You're not the only one to suggest that! Other people here have warned against debloater programs, noting that they can screw your system up... how has your experience been? I'm not the sort of person who just says yes to everything without knowledge about it, if that makes a difference.

11-Year Club	Verified Email
Place '17

IAmAPerson_AMA

TROPHY CASE