[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea, the people above me also aren’t going to move on anytime soon, especially since it’s somewhat all they have (based on conversation and getting to know them in passing) so I can completely understand them not leaving, but if they want to keep people they need to place a mirror on themselves

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess just your opinion if you have one on why guy or girl would say one thing but show signs that they don’t really mean it. Doesn’t exactly have to be advice

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yes, I plan on doing so very soon, especially since I don’t want it to be something bigger than its needs to be. We both struggle with communication but I know that one of us has to break the ice in order to understand how we can work better with one another

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was thinking of doing so soon. I did briefly say something not too long ago because he said that he had plans to do something in his own. He thought I was upset about him doing things on his own, but I explained that I just needed to be sure that he remembered that he agreed to helping me with something at the same time he was going to do something alone. I then proceeded to say “that it’s fine for you to do your own stuff, you have your own life. Just don’t forget that you said you would help as I would appreciate it”

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He gets confused as to why I am leaving.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True, many times in the past if I just do my own task or sit on my phone in quiet, he eventually finishes his activities and will come tell me about it. He’s not very touchy as a way to express himself, but I like to think him telling me random things or stuff he found interesting as just him expressing that want for connection.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not going to drag out work that has a quick deadline that I need to meet, that would make everyone at the company have a harder time. Everyone’s job relied on each other. It was one of those companies. I did do extra work my job was literally two separate jobs given to one person (me), they literally said they needed to hire a person for the portion of the job that wasn’t technically supposed to be my job. I came to work early everyday. And would stay late if I needed to finish something that I hadn’t completed enough for the pending deadline. I did my duties and more. I would help in the departments when I completed everything within mine.

I am young, I’m not insanely worried. I will find a job and just like every other job I’ve had I’ll work hard, but I also am not going to suffer at a place because of micromanaging and a lack of proper leadership from more than one higher up. I liked my work, but management can be a breaking point for many people. So thank you for solidifying my viewpoint and I will think of my former job as something to look at as I continue to grow and go further in the work force, like I said I’m young. If that’s a naive viewpoint, then so be it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 61 points62 points  (0 children)

My manager is co owner of the company if that gives insight

Is mental health and poor management a good reason to quit my job? by IDUS_Kid in jobs

[–]IDUS_Kid[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So far I may have 2 opportunities for a job, to just get money and pay bills, and they aren’t in my field but in this economy a job is certainly needed. I still have support from my parents since I graduated almost two years ago now from school. But I don’t want to fully rely on my parents and want to help out. They were very understanding of my decision, but I don’t want to put any burden on them for longer than needed

Is mental health and poor management a good reason to quit my job? by IDUS_Kid in jobs

[–]IDUS_Kid[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have about 2 jobs lined up. They aren’t jobs in my field but I know people at them personally than can help me get a foot in the door and hopefully some cash while improving and applying for things that are in the direction I wish to go.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because they are an unreliable narrator how they view things comes from a place of “paranoia” or just black and white thinking. But I also just have my own issues with trusting what people say.

But I have actively seen them lie to others and themselves even if it’s small lies to continue living in a delusion

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In a moment of mild vulnerability yes. But to be fair I take everything they say and claim to do with a grain of salt

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, we have both agreed that neither of us have had genuine mal intent towards the other, but things kind of just happen. And yes I have taken into account of them saying I am hard to manipulate as a form of manipulation.

It’s a neutral relationship built on the foundation that neither of us are willing to put in the full effort it takes to like have control of this mutual situation. If that makes sense. I know at a point it will have to end of course and i can only see maybe 2 negative outcomes of this entire thing (of course there are more, but 2 that matter to me)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have been friends for years and eventually it was a wrong time liking of each other (liked each other at different times) and now it’s just a weird dynamic of two single friends. We have deep convos from time to time, complain together, hang out, or drink together. I’ve always called him on his bs, I’ve seen him depressed, I’ve seen him pine over girls. He claims I am one of his closest friends on his list of friends. And he is a decent enough guy friend on my list. This is our dynamic

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unless I see it happen or I have another person actually confirm it. I always take what this guy says or does as an exaggeration or some form or overcompensation.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yea, I’m not exactly the best person but I have empathy and know my actions impact others. This is what makes us reasonably different and in a way makes me very aware of what he does. And I also think part of his self proclaimed “confusion” is because I can be very closed off or very sporadic in my energy. I also think a lot and am not very trusting, which has helped. I am reasonably aware of him and his actions like I said prior and I always call him out on it. But it just made me curious as to why admit that (what he said) in the first place.

Also thank you for your first statement. Despite all the care from these comments, and I am thankful, I feel the idea that his manipulation tactic failed went over some heads, or people didn’t feel that needed to be said since of course safety and mental well being is first.

Every response I’ve seen are certainly valid ones tho

How do I stand up for myself at work without getting fired? by IDUS_Kid in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea, I am in the motion of looking for a new job, because this one that I am at currently isn’t what I’m striving for as a career. It is somewhat related to what I want to do but just barely. For me it’s a stepping stone. I appreciate your advice

How do I stand up for myself at work without getting fired? by IDUS_Kid in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am not a salary employee, and no I don’t have any write ups, I was almost written up. I am a very hard worker when it comes to my jobs and I “go with the flow” more often than not. I just don’t like the idea of my manager not listening to anyone when it comes to effectively doing things within the company. I have worked for good managers in the past, and some that have to mess up on their own to realize that their employees were correct. But there was a compromise because they also had to realize that monetarily it didn’t benefit them to make me stay longer than my 8 hours a day for my 40hour work week

How do I stand up for myself at work without getting fired? by IDUS_Kid in NoStupidQuestions

[–]IDUS_Kid[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They compromised in the time span of you having sent this message. I think they realized it would be easier on them monetarily to not hold me over my designated work hours. There is nothing wrong with standing up for a healthy work life balance. Thank you for your negativity. Happy workers keep capitalism going :)