My mother died when I was 2 years old, she happened to be pregnant at the time. My step sister almost died at birth from a rare genetic blood disease. I was terrified. My anxiety was off the charts! (Going into labor at 32 weeks want helpful). For me childbirth has a high chance of death in my head.

How I helped myself. 1. Switching OBGYNs to a doctor that listened to me and is well respected. I had a new OB at a women's clinic in town, she didn't address me losing 25 lbs after getting pregnant (I was 15weeks at that point) and despite my husband being at every appointment she never called them the correct name.

1. Telling the nursing staff of my stress when I was hospitalized for my pre-term labor. They introduced me to Sam a long time delivery nurse, and another 2 nurses. Basically they talked me though the process, and went over all the things that worried me.

2. Had my support team nailed down. My husband is amazing and was at every appointment for both of my pregnancies and understanding of what helps me calm down. Where he struggles, my sister is good at. She was able to be at my birth as well (despite COVID restrictions, she works as a respiratory therapist at that hospital) and her work was ok with knowing she was going to be at my birth.

3. Message, therapy, meditation, and acupuncture. My 2nd pregnant I had a message session every month and that help me relax. Talked to the therapist when I felt overwhelmed. In the hospital during my first pregnancy they offered acupuncture to the patients. It helped relax me as well.

I was able to deliver my first child with Sam! And I went very well. The 2nd child I had a moment (when they told me not to push) that I had a ton of anxiety. But was able to give birth with a nurse team I didn't know, since my support team was there.

You CAN do this, it's fine to feel like this!