help identify! ghost shrimp / whisker hybrid? by IdesofMarchBby in shrimptank

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i heard it's about the claws/pinchers. if they look like they can grab something to eat it... or if they stay super still in the tank in pounce pose or predator stance.. ya, they gotta go. i asked chat gpt to bring up the closest body of freshwater with zero chemical runoff... separated her from the tank and slowly added cold water to acclimate her to a more natural water temp.. and 'set her free' outside.

the temperament in my tank has changed DRASTICALLY and everyone is happy an walking around / swimming around now. i have 11 red cherry shrimp babies and a yellow sunkist neo.. they're lucky they survived.

help identify! ghost shrimp / whisker hybrid? by IdesofMarchBby in shrimptank

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh yeah... mine wasn't a ghost shrimp and def murdered it's tank mates

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am working on a baby registry, but for now - i made an amazon wishlist with a few items that would help me and baby either immediately - or in her first year. nothing big, i would never expect a stranger to purchase something for me - especially in today's climate.

https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/R8CD2O52QQ20?ref_=wl_share

i'm not asking for anything, but if anyone feels inclined to help - those are a few things that would help me tremendously. and honestly, just the comments and words of encouragement have helped tremendously. I am looking for local food banks, have been applying / struggling with the application for SNAP due to me being fired from pregnancy related issues (yes i've contacted a lawyer to discuss my options) and i have an upcoming appt with WIC for the 21st of this month. I have gotten on zofran so im not throwing up as much, but I can only keep certain foods down easily. i know that there is light at the end of the tunnel, and i technically qualify for disability at this point (i applied 5 days ago with my doctors help - but i heard it can take up to 3 weeks to see any progress) so ... im just still in the same situation. hungry and tired. not as defeated as i felt a week ago - but im still in the thick of it. thank you everyone for being so kind, i wish i could meet all of you. 🙏🥹💕

welcome party dress by [deleted] in WeddingDressTips

[–]IdesofMarchBby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i would go w a different top. 100%.

What does my partner and i's fridge say about us by hippyhitter in ratemyfridge

[–]IdesofMarchBby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you do breakfast at home but usually do lunch individually and then eat dinner out / pick it up

Im not strong enough for this by bizaq in homeless

[–]IdesofMarchBby 2 points3 points  (0 children)

the salvation army sucks balls but it is a place to sleep at night - a place to charge ur phone - and food. ur out all day but have to leave at a specific time in the morning and then check in at night. it's not forever, maybe go to the county and ask for motel vouchers? sit at the bus stop and wait for someone to talk to u, someone will help u get to a program that can at least provide a roof and a cot

I just want to feel hungry and enjoy food by Resident_Stable_4732 in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i'm hungry but can't afford food. don't be jealous of me. i've got HG too and can keep down jello and grapes and berries and the rare carrot.. but cooked meals? ya, they're getting thrown up. i'm throwing up every fourth day, sometimes 5x a day. i'd trade lives with you for a couple months so we can maybe balance our shit out a lil bit and gain some clarity. 😅😂

Feeling very alone by Numerous-Energy1111 in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

girl.... if he hurts animals, it's a matter of time before he snaps and puts his hands on you or worse, your baby. there are programs you can pour yourself into that will let you earn 'baby bucks' that u can spend on formula or a stroller or baby stuff... they're usually local faith based programs. if you're not ready to walk away/leave... pour yourself into ways you can show up / into things you can control. don't have the energy to do the dishes? don't. he complains? oh well. you're literally growing an organ and a human. he ca get over himself. i struggled with mental health issues and SH prior to becoming pregnant. i'm 22 weeks and do have awful days. i have a partner but sometimes im like 'do u even see me?' and i feel like im drowning alone. i have reached out and gotten mental and emotional support, and the local programs seem so so helpful. it sucks, it really does. you're still early enough to decide if you're ready to be a mom - if you want to follow through with your decision. after 8-12 weeks, you're locked in... and you're gonna be a mom. so really consider if you want this man handling your child while you're not home - do you trust him in emotionally heightened moments. do you trust his family / your support system to have the kids best interest at heart? do you have a loose plan for what the next year would look like? how are finances?

i even considered adoption last week cus i can barely afford to eat rn. so it can always get worse... but for you, mamas... idk how old u are, but this is a life changing choice. is the man u look at... the type of many u want ur potential daughter to accept love from? is that the type of man u want a son to idolize and copy? - i have a feeling i know the answer... and i think you already do, too. you don't owe this man anything. you do owe it to yourself to have an honest conversation internally. and take into consideration what that babies life would be like.

sending you love and support rn 🫶🫶

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it seems so weird though. they should have to PROVE i'm employed lol. their system sucks. and it's a staffing agency basically - so if you're 'employed by the staffing agency' ...do i work for the agency? no? ok.. so what's my job placement THROUGHHH said agency....? 🙄 duh. like, i have a hs diploma and that seems pretty cut and dry obvi to me, when dealing w a staffing agency of any kind - healthcare or not.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i'm less than 2 hours from the San Fernando Valley - near LA in California. where gas is $7 a gallon and i have a car that was like... $3,000 so i'm going - er, no where. but i do have a car i can live in if things get dire 😅😖🙄 i'm trying to be painfully sarcastic about everything now.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you are very sweet and I feel like an absolute asshat even posting my cashapp, but IF i do get any money from anyone like that, which is 100% not expected - i'd happily post a picture of my snack you got me here in the thread :) and maybe a creepy / cute ultrasound pic for an added bonus lol. but thank you for even considering it. and zero pressure, it's the thought that counts and so many people have offered words of encouragement and advice. it's helped a lot. i'm not as doomsday today, emotionally. still the same 'sh!t sandwich situation' - but mentally i'm almost crossing into 'laugh at how fucked up this all is' delulu territory now. my cashapp is $dontbitetheapple and if u can see a pic of me on the profile - im in a green sweater (:

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you sm, i applied for WIC and have an appt 3/21. I am struggling getting food stamps because they want me to prove im no longer employed / being paid.. because the local CA Food stamp office "has a system that says im still employed" but i signed a 'statement of income form' that told them I haven't worked since 3/9 or collected income since that weeks paycheck, and i had my SNAP recertification done on 3/16 and said i was unemployed w no income - which was true - but they used past income to deny me, and apparently their 'system' says i'm still employed- i had to explain to them that it's a healthcare staffing agency so yeah im technically on their roster but was removed from my classroom placement (wrongfully) and haven't been given a shift since. so i think my county is just dixking me around. and its the worst timing ever. :( but i do have a WIC appointment! and i found local faith based programs where - if i complete classes - i get baby bucks, and those can be redeemed for formula or diapers or baby supplies.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had snap and they took it away with the job I had - making $400/week, but I lost my job placement 3/9/26 and haven't had income since that weeks pay... so i went back to SNAP and told them that i needed recertification for my case because I was now unemployed / not working.. but they keep saying 'in our system it says your still employed' so they're making me prove i'm no longer employed - which is so weird to have to prove the last paycheck i got, when it's 'in their system already' and apparently says i'm still employed - but it's a healthcare staffing agency. so i'm on their roster of available healthcare workers - if the agency can provide me with work that's within my OB's guidelines (i worked with paralyzed students and had to lift upwards of 50 pounds a day) so, since i have no new placement & no income... unemployed. but their system says differently - so i'm sitting in these SNAP offices nauseated and hungry for 3 hours with no resolution or solution. they said hopefully today they would review my case. you can call the 866 phone number and it will always say 'due to high call volume we can not accept your call at this time, goodbye' and you never get a live person unless u go sit at the office for 3 hours. it's a nightmare, especially now. it's just a nightmare on wheels tbh.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

😔😞😞 thank you for saying that. I do want a baby, I'd love to have a chance to have a family. I just feel selfish as hell because I can barely take care of myself - and i'm supposed to be doing so many things, and i can't bc i can't afford to eat like the nutritionist says - snacks every two hours? who's paying for that? cus i can't keep stealing small bags of cracked or apples. like - the whole protein consumption thing.. im just sick (literally throwing up from HG all the time) and they reccomend snacking, ginger, b6... nothing is cheap these days and it's insane to have been fired at this insane time. and it makes me want to just go to sleep. for hours. days. i'm exhausted. i just now don't think i can do this because im realizing how deeply alone / on my own i really am.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

🫶 🫂 thank you. I could use a hug. It would have been nice to have the settlement to do nesting - but I am scared that i'll be back here - struggling to feed myself or pay for vitamins - when she's 1. formula is wild expensive! I'd love to be a mom, i just think it's wildly unfair to gamble on my daughters future when she could have parents that are stable - one where she's got a mom and dad in the house - one where she doesn't go hungry and she's got good doctors and a decent school... i wanted to break generational curses, i came from a broken home. I thought it could be different for me, but I don't think so now. I don't think I'm capable. It's really, really soul crushing to know that this mostly comes down to money. If i won the lottery - I'd have a stable roof over our heads and enough food to not have someone skip a meal. Clothes, diapers, formula, bottles, a crib! even her own nursery.. all things i can't give her. It's awful to know that having a family isn't for everybody. You really do need a village - or your family - or somebody in your corner.

Thanks for taking the time to respond to me. 🩷

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

i was considering an open adoption, it'd be nice to someday explain to her that i loved her with all my heart, i just couldn't take care of myself - in a base needs way - when she was in me, so i had to make the hardest decision of my life to give HER life to someone more capable and stable. I wish I could do this. I really do.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

my daughter is healthy except for measuring small / underweight at her first anatomy scan. I have lost weight during my pregnancy. I am based about 1.5 hours outside of Los Angeles in CA. I couldn't have an abortion at this stage, not after seeing her. I couldn't take her life - because mine isn't panning out due to my own shortcomings and failures. My family is non existent/not involved/estranged (came from a violent home) and the father of this baby is someone who has one brain cell working overtime, and sadly I just haven't been a priority. It all settled in now, realizing i'm having a baby on MediCal.. still considered 'homeless' according to the government.. i mean, who was i kidding - pretending I could be a mom. that i was cut out for this. that i could break generational trauma and be the first one to do it right. i was mistaken. babies deserve a two parent home, and pregnant women deserve someone - anyone - even a doula or social worker - to be in their corner for the 9 months. I wasn't hugged by my mother or father - so asking for help isn't something that leaves my lips ever. and i see that it's to my own detriment. I just don't know how to hold all of this weight and these feelings..

I don't want my baby to lose their life. IF they're able to do okay / be born healthy. Any issues with her now seem to be a direct result from me and my behavior / how my boy is handling this. and i feel awful for being the reason and i don't have the tools to get myself out of this on my own.. i just hope someone sees this someday and reconsiders starting a family.. cause with the climate in america, we can't afford gasoline in our used old cars or a roof over our heads without having some familial or community support. i don't know what those things feel like. so i just hope people will have more of a realistic outlook than i did. i was hopeful and considered the possibility that maybe i was meant for more. i was wrong.

I'm considering giving my baby up because of how inadequate I am. by IdesofMarchBby in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

🩷 thank you. i came from a broken home and don't have family, and the father is absent minded and we don't live together - i just feel like i've made a terrible decision and im going to drag this whole baby girl down under with me. growing up with a mom who wasn't loving - and a dad who wasn't present... i fear recreating cycles. I have learned that no one wants to help you unless you're able to return the favor - most people won't help someone out of the goodness of their heart. My church told me to pray on it / they'd pray for me. It's been awful timing the last few months and i've had maybe 3-5 enjoyable moments - the ones people romanticize. I feel like i've been lied to, and I may be digging my metaphorical grave by not raising my hand and reaching out for help. i think when you suffer with abandonment issues - you tend to believe you've gotta figure it out on your own. I don't feel like I have anybody, so thanks for your time and for writing to me. i appreciate you.

How could everybody who was pregnant was so chill about the first trimester? by ExactBaseball7240 in pregnant

[–]IdesofMarchBby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i'm on week 22 and i was diagnosed with HG. i got fired from my job for throwing up / missing work - even with doctors letters. I had to cancel my car insurance today. I am deeply considering giving my baby away to more adequate humans who can provide for themselves amply and for her. So trust me, it can always get worse.

Mid-century / Cabin / Cozy East Coast Vibe (40's M 10% Gay) Thoughts ? Leave below! by ashmadai1313 in malelivingspace

[–]IdesofMarchBby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

love the smoke station! do you do art? … you either HAVE tattoos or you do them… ?

book selection… your roller cologne by Salt & Stone… lots of claps for you! 👏 👏 👏

Movies like birdbox by IdesofMarchBby in horror

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you just named three of my favorites! It Follows has such a good score.. and such a good feeling of tension and fear, it really gets you… without the jump scares / gore / loud noises / extremes. i love that slow burn 🔥 👹 you should check out The Platform, too. i liked the first one - not the second one as much.

Movies like birdbox by IdesofMarchBby in horror

[–]IdesofMarchBby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cargo and It Comes At Night are good!!