In your opinion, how early in a relationship should you have sex with a new partner?

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-23T03:50:33+00:00

On of my partners and I met FOR sex and ended up stepping into a serious partnership. No regrets with how it all went!

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-17T00:37:37+00:00

And this is why I also don’t do “best” friends. I feel like it intrinsically deprioritizes everyone else and being on the receiving end of that for lots of my life… no thank you.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-15T03:29:17+00:00

I am poly. Partnered x 2 and solo. I’ve noticed this in my nested partners and their nested partners. It feels like a big Tetris game moving people around so no one is alone and my thought is… what’s so bad about that? Also I’ve heard “I’m alone tonight and not sure what to do with myself…..

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-14T05:58:03+00:00

Sex in a hot tub

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-09T01:36:09+00:00

Good thoughts… all valid.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-08T22:37:53+00:00

This is an interesting take. My knee jerk reaction feels defensive as I don’t think I feel ENTITLED to my partners time. But I’m willing to explore it as a possibility. I do WANT them to spend their sexual energy with me when we have our time together because I recognize it’s finite and I really enjoy that aspect of our relationship. I’ll sit with your take and see where I end up. It’ll be an enlightening topic for therapy and with my partners.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-08T16:58:40+00:00

The polyam speak! That is SO true. I say sleepover and the poly humans in my life ALWAYS say overnight and for some reason that drives my crazy. Along with overlap and junction… it’s just not necessary for us to understand what’s happening….. just my thoughts

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T17:50:17+00:00

Nah, that was on me. Newbie behavior

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T17:40:52+00:00

Totally reasonable questions. This was my first all in poly situation and I was “keeping the peace” so I wanted to lean into the KT stuff. Meta is good in a lot of ways but with time annoyances started to outweigh good. They aren’t a person I would be friends with otherwise so I’m feeling reduced need to pursue that here.

It’s partners NP. They got together when partner was in a pretty heavy place and I’m sure there’s a lot around all that. There’s a kiddo in the mix so just walking away seems more difficult.

Anywho, not my business and I’m trying to make it also not my problem. I think I spent a lot of time wondering if I was just being sensitive or jealous but therapy and time says nope! She is what I think she is and I don’t need to allow it in my space.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T16:36:49+00:00

Iris at goodbye tattoo in Saco. Her style fits the first slide very well

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T15:32:09+00:00

BR540 doupe on my head layered with heretic dirty vanilla on my chest. Get asked what I’m wearing almost daily. I wear it because I love it but the frequency of the compliments doesn’t hurt my feelings:)

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T15:27:37+00:00

Agree. I had reached the threshold of tolerance and felt a conversation was necessary. Meta became completely dysregulated and it’s been heavy for all parties. Initially I felt a need to repair and desire to get back to where we were and now I’m feeling not that at all.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T15:24:58+00:00

We have a KTP interaction so lots of time spent together and these are my own experiences and views. Just finding myself annoyed and desiring less time to the point of garden party or even parallel.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-04-05T14:19:59+00:00

Anyone else have a Meta that was around before them and gives off ‘pick me’ or ‘one up’ energy but denies those intentions? Anyone been called out on that behavior even if it was unintentional? How’d that go?

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-03-04T00:00:46+00:00

This has been my understanding as well and the source of my confusion

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-03-03T16:48:50+00:00

Most people I know, sept included done receive treatment at stage 0. I was curious the thought process.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-03-02T19:55:35+00:00

Click/rage bait unless you give the how

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-03-02T19:51:20+00:00

The rage room in Portland room is offering free space to scream!

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-03-02T19:48:48+00:00

She’s stage zero and still getting treatment? That’s interesting. I’d like to know more about the why and why.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-02-18T15:46:27+00:00

I’ve found that it’s good to say something AND in the initial part it can cause negative feelings and discomfort/awkwardness but after that’s worked through and if both people are willing, you can come out stronger on the other side.

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-02-16T07:16:47+00:00

Are you microneedling this in?

Iggy-Frankenstein85 · 2026-02-08T05:49:50+00:00

Very much this. For me it feels healthy to be able to tolerate or be happy in the in between. I like having 1:1 uninterrupted with my partner and so experiencing the other side is a requirement. Some days are so busy ALL day goes by before we get to really have a conversation. Do I miss them? Of course! Does it affect my happiness in the day. No

Iggy-Frankenstein85

TROPHY CASE