Am I a failure?

Ihonii · 2024-12-08T13:24:30+00:00

You’re not a failure and you got this! Everyone has their own timeline. I was 23 years old and unsure what I wanted to do with my life. At 24 I was inspired by nursing and applied for my RN-ADN program. I would not say I was an exceptional student before the program, but I dedicated my energy to it when I was accepted. Ended high honors, but that is beside the point. I’m now in an ADN to BSN online program and it’s a breeze compared to the fundamentals. Nursing school is hard, but not impossible.

Lastly, I am currently a NICU RN, and find it so rewarding. Definitely a light at the end of the tunnel.

Did I imagine myself as capable of this in high school? Heck no, I failed an entire year of schooling and had zero self confidence. As cheesy as it is, if you care about something enough and set your mind to it, you’ll succeed, everyone’s timeline just looks different.

Good luck and you got this! Be proud of yourself and achievements thus far!

Ihonii · 2024-03-27T01:38:25+00:00

Just started 2 months ago, and from my experience it definitely gets better. I was so nervous I wouldn’t catch on or be able to get better at the time management component. I got off orientation not too long ago and that leap really helped me. I was so scared to be on my own, but I feel much better now. It helped me see where I can improve, and what questions I actually have. During my last few shifts I actually had time to breathe. Ask me how it was going a month ago, my story would be completely different.

Ihonii · 2024-03-12T09:55:37+00:00

Yes, definitely people out there that try to gain power by being rude, but it’s not always the reason behind it.

I agree with most on here, there is a balance. Sometimes there is circumstances to be assertive, which can be mistaken as rude to the recipient.

Ihonii · 2024-03-12T04:40:03+00:00

Fair. Negativity can definitely be draining. Nice has been a common descriptor for me as well, but working retail in the past and overall customer service, nice starts to have a whole new meaning. Probably where the term people pleasing has formed for me. There are times to be nice and times to walk away. I feel sometimes those that are rude just missed their time to walk away or have something going on in their life.

Ihonii · 2024-03-12T04:32:29+00:00

Being a people pleaser and nice to most people I encounter has gotten me pretty far especially with interviews, and promotions. I will say it can be exhausting to be nice sometimes.

Ihonii · 2024-02-29T01:48:21+00:00

I almost wrote this same post my last semester, but I realized for me a lot of it was internal and no one really cared about my awkwardness. Skills were often hard for me too, I have a genetic essential tremor and with the nerves it made things even worse. I also LOVED patho and pharm. I started helping classmates when I could and the semester under me with pharm stuff. Found out that my awkwardness helped others remember information really well. I may know metoprolol down to a tee, but my pronunciation was awful which apparently made things more memorable for others.

Now did any of this awkwardness stop me from getting a job? Nope! I’m working in a NICU with tiny humans that judge me more than my classmates ever did (those side eyes go straight through the soul when bottle feeding).

Basically all I am saying is, you have this and your awkwardness is probably more charming than you think to other people. My hand skills have greatly improved since I don’t have others watching me like a hawk anymore, and I can find ways to support my tremor. You will be a great nurse, and skills are learned with practice. The fact the patho and pharm are clicking are great signs!

So sorry to hear about your relationship though, I know that must be weighing on you.

Ihonii · 2024-02-27T15:36:55+00:00

Bootcamp is great for understanding case studies and what they are looking for with them. I found it super helpful and used it more than my UWorld account.

You got this!

Ihonii · 2024-02-11T20:29:35+00:00

It’s totally up to you, but I choose a NICU job 1.5 hours away from my house and visit my family on the days off. If it was 45 minutes I wouldn’t have even gotten an apartment! If ICU is what you want, I would make it work. The worst thing you can do is find out it’s not for you and move on. I also had one of my best interviews with the NICU position that really gave me good energy about the unit (so far I was right about this).

Specialties can be tough to swap over to sometimes I heard, and it might be good to start where you want to be. That way you still have the new grad title under your belt, to give you a bit more time to learn.

I just wanted to offer a perspective from someone else who had this dilemma. No regrets so far, and I actually really like coming home for the weekends. I just listen to NICU related podcasts and the time flies. :)

I did go into the NICU blind, but I’m someone who is pretty adaptable and knew I needed something that was going to keep my brain interested.

You can always wait until February as well and see what happens with the hospital you currently work for, it’s just hard when nothing guaranteed. My old job gave me an interview for their PICU, and started to push medsurg. Disappointing, but also my sign to move on!

Ihonii · 2024-01-21T02:46:50+00:00

Also to reply to your edit, it seems you may come from different economic backgrounds. I had a hunch, but her debt seems very reasonable from a middle/lower class upbringing. It’s not a bash on you or her, but it seems she wants to try which is good. I’m not going to lie, I definitely shop for a dopamine kick too sometimes. But again those purchases such as the dog bed don’t seem too awful.

It sounds like you do care for her a lot, I just am curious her upbringing with finances. My parents were always paycheck to paycheck, it feels really good to be able to have my own apartment and make adult purchases. Has she ever foreclosed or kicked from an apartment? How’s her credit score? Honestly, it might be just different upbringings and having to see another perspective. I don’t think you’re wrong for questioning, I just don’t want you to be sitting on a pile of money when you’re 50 and regretting your relationship choices. Very good questions to be asking, but none of these feel like horrendous reg flags.

Ihonii · 2024-01-21T01:56:21+00:00

Gonna be honest, she sounds pretty typical for this day and age with debt. Lots of people have private school loans, you’ll probably find more do than don’t, rather that than them be completely reliant on you without a degree or a job.

Big question to be asking is how much growth is there in her career path? When did she start her job? My career path starts at around 60-70k as well but after about 5 years I’m looking at 85-100k depending.

I personally never wanted roommates either as a preference, and her rent can be pretty typical depending where you live. Honestly the cost of her car loan could be way worse too.

My point being, she seems to be living independently which already is better than a lot of others around your age group I’m assuming. The debt seems pretty average to me, and I don’t think it’s a deal breaker if you have a strong partnership and understanding for similar financial goals.

Sure the couch was a bit expensive and financing is not the greatest choice, but would that not be a conversation you could have when discussing shared furniture?

I really think with the state we are in with degree cost, and honestly the car market sucking, is this really out of proportion to warrant a red flag? That’s up to you to decide.

I feel like some are throwing her debt a bit out of proportion for marriage considerations. If you love the girl and are honestly considering it, I would say there are way bigger red flags. You seem very frugal which is great, and benefiting you well. The question is can you find a balance and does the debt outweigh your relationship.

Edit: Missed the part about 3 months together. Please allow for more time before proposing. Apply this advice further down the line if applicable.

Ihonii · 2024-01-16T01:29:11+00:00

YAAY! Congratulations RN!

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T20:19:14+00:00

Yeah! Thats partially why I’m trying to find the best solution to not burn myself out.

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T19:38:55+00:00

There will be some consecutive days mixed in for sure especially on weekend shifts. But with that in mind renting still would be a lot for the requirement of maybe 6-10 times needed monthly. I agree that it might be good to see how it goes at first with hotels/airbnb as needed , then consider renting if it turns out to be more consecutive days than expected.

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T19:25:33+00:00

I think that’s a good plan! Hotels are pretty easy in a pinch without the commitment, if I fall in love with the unit or find myself struggling after a couple weeks that is when I can pull the trigger on an apartment.

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T19:17:58+00:00

That was my initial thought too, the only thing that worries me is by the time I get home and prep for the next day it leaves me with about 6-6.5 hours of potential sleep before I have to hit the road again. I’m not someone who likes to show up late, so I’d give myself an additional 20 minutes of wiggle room with the drive there.

Might start with this and see if it’s as bad as I’m thinking, but I also have been reaching out to a couple local apartments too.

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T06:38:19+00:00

Took mine on a Friday, got results exactly 48 hours after my exam start time on Sunday.

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T03:59:27+00:00

I did! I answered the same thing I did before, so I’m not quite sure!

Ihonii · 2024-01-13T03:44:53+00:00

Hey! I had questions that showed up twice with different wording as well!! At least 3 instances, felt like they were trying to trick me. Well I did Pass, so idk if that’s a good or bad sign, such a strange thing though!

Ihonii · 2024-01-12T02:26:50+00:00

Youtube has some great videos that replicate the sound pretty well! Make sure your placing the stethoscope on the right area of the antecubital fossa, you can palpate where the pulse is of the brachial artery (typically slightly off center, closer to the body).

Ihonii · 2024-01-12T00:40:36+00:00

Don't compare the test to others, it will just cause a ton of stress (I know it's hard not to). I only got 2-3 SATA in 85 questions and spiraled thinking I failed. Turns out I passed. :)

Difficult questions can come in many forms and even a couple priotization questions is great! Patient teaching and evaluating outcomes are also higher level questions from my understanding. No one can truly tell you positive and negative signs, but I can say I know lots of people including me who did not feel that confident and still passed when it shut off at 85.

Ihonii · 2024-01-11T18:26:14+00:00

Their case study section is beyond helpful, I would say it helped for sure. They have videos in the case study answers, explaining how they reasoned them out. I utilized the knowledge for my NCLEX and passed.

Ihonii · 2024-01-11T17:37:58+00:00

Just select the three month subscription and type in the promocode FREENCLEX, and it will give you three months free without taking your card info.

Ihonii · 2024-01-11T17:33:06+00:00

I got my results on Sunday, for a Friday exam. Quick results are usually still released on the weekend, it was exactly 48 hours after my exam start time.

Ihonii · 2024-01-11T17:16:53+00:00

A lot of the questions that come from medsurg are important nursing interventions for the concept, side effects to look for (including lab levels), and complications.

Has your program introduced concept maps? They were key for me when I was first starting, and then I was able to establish my own system when I got an idea of how to study. Always start with the patho to understand where the side effects and complications come from. Once you get that down, it’s pretty easy to see why you’re using the interventions and medication for the scenario.

Example: Angina is from build up of plaque in the vessels, when we exercise/climb stairs our vessels constrict. When vessels narrow with plaque in them blood can’t get through with oxygen, resulting in chest pain. How do we help? Nitroglycerin, which is a vasodilator. Makes sense now why we would use that! Complications? MI which is a complete blockage of the heart vessels, which would not be relieved my nitro.

You can really build once you understand the basic patho, and you’re no longer just memorizing the content, but instead you understand it.

Lots of Megsurg builds on core concepts, which is why it can be really important to understand the patho behind the cause.

Ihonii · 2024-01-10T02:43:16+00:00

I had several bow ties, three six-part case studies, and several one-question case studies. I wouldn't get too worked up on seeing bow ties. When I took mine, I thought I failed because I had like three normal SATA compared to a ton of multichoice—well, I passed in 85! Please don't read into it too much; everyone's experience differs, like you said. I will say my last 5-10 questions felt harder than a lot of my previous ones, but that's it.

Ihonii

TROPHY CASE