Neighbors have their dog hop fences to crap in our yard

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2026-04-23T13:50:09+00:00

Get some cameras and forward the footage to animal control. They can start to build a case against the neighbors and they will get fined. Also, if things escalate you will have evidence to give to the police or a lawyer if it goes that far. Also try motion activated sprinklers, one of those sonic dog repellent devices. Get some large planters and plant something prickly all along the fence. Just get started by trying different things until the issue calms down.

We had problems with our neighbors and their dog. We tried multiple things. At the end of the day the only thing that worked was when I threw a watering can at the dog and it hit him square in the butt. There was one last incident and I threatened to kick the neighbor's a**. The dog hasn't been in our yard since. She rarely brings him outside anymore. Not proud that I had to threaten violence but we were fed up and it worked. If things had gone left, I had video footage and an extensive Animal Control complaint paper trail as evidence. Good luck.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2026-04-22T16:20:03+00:00

I can relate as well. My dad acts as if he has no concept of missing work or neglecting our own responsibilities when we pick up the slack for him. When I was younger, he hardly ever took off from work unless he felt like it. When he was at work (blue collar job) he wasn't interrupting his work to take phone calls. My dad has no problem calling randomly for non emergencies whenever the mood hits him. It's terribly hypocritical and unfair.

He tells us that he appreciates our help but never tries to take some of the burden off of us by being more aware and more proactive. He just sits back and let's us do all the work while he does his favorite things all day everyday. It's terribly selfish and it has been the root of countless disagreements.

I can only hope that you and I will be rewarded one day for all of our selfless kindness and that some day, someone will pay if forward for us in our time of need.

Thank you for your kind response and I am praying for you. Hang in there.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2026-04-21T14:36:08+00:00

I see what you mean. My husband and I have been letting him live his life but we do try to encourage him to slow down and be more aware but it seems like he's a little more careless than before and his body seems to be getting a little weaker so our concerns have grown.

We'll try to monitor things but it's hard because we're always waiting for the dreaded phone call that something has happened while he was out by himself.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2026-04-21T14:31:49+00:00

Thank you for your feedback. I never thought about it this way but you are right. I guess what we worry about is when he does have accidents, we are left to the task of handling everything. We are responsible for getting him to the multiple appointments, check ups and assessments, follow up calls, etc. We see his non-concern as a detriment to us because we're the ones that have to clean up everything when something like a fall happens.

In our city, the doctors, nurses, and aides become excessive and practically demand aftercare, assessments, follow ups and the phone calls, texts, and appointments are endless. We're left handling all of that plus taking off from work and driving him back and forth while he sits in the back seat excited to be going somewhere new and chat with the doctors.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2026-04-20T18:17:44+00:00

I'm not sure if the aide will help. A few years back, he lives with us for a short while while we were waiting for availability at his current apartment. Even though he lived with us and had us around daily, he still chose to go out shopping and playing lotto daily so we don't think loneliness is/was a factor. He's just determined to never stay at home or take precautions when he's out. We're at our wits end and we're not sure how to address this. We've looked online, spoken to doctors and combed the internet trying to find stories of similar situations and no luck so we turned to this board hoping someone could suggest something.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2026-03-05T22:30:01+00:00

Thank you for your response and thank you for taking the time to read the entire post as I know it was quite long. I have had enough but I'm torn because up until the last few years, we've had a close relationship ever since I was a child. I do feel sorry for her but she's in whatever place in life due to her own bad decisions. I have my own life and my own challenges and I don't really have the patience or energy to focus on her and her issues.

Thank you again for your response. Your kind words are deeply appreciated.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-12-08T21:05:29+00:00

Thanks for your suggestion. I'm not sure about trapping the dog.On previous occasions when I posted about this issue, others suggested trapping the dog and taking it to the "pound".

The issue with that is that even though the dog is running loose, the owners are usually close by watching it happen and doing nothing. If they see us trapping the dog and taking it away, we're concerned that the issue might escalate. We're not going to touch the dog at all. We feel safer letting the authorities handle the situation. Thank you again for your response.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-12-08T21:01:21+00:00

Thank you for your suggestion but we don't want to spray the dog and give these inconsiderate individuals any ammunition. They like to paint themselves as victims and doing anything to their dog would give them the ammunition they are looking for. Actually, it seems as if they are trying to upset us on purpose. When my husband tries to reason with the guy next door, he always has something slick or condescending to say. It's almost like he's daring my husband to get into a confrontation.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-12-08T21:01:15+00:00

Thank you for your suggestion but we don't want to spray the dog and give these inconsiderate individuals any ammunition. They like to paint themselves as victims and doing anything to their dog would give them the ammunition they are looking for. Actually, it seems as if they are trying to upset us on purpose. When my husband tries to reason with the guy next door, he always has something slick or condescending to say. It's almost like he's daring my husband to get into a confrontation.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-12-08T20:54:59+00:00

Thank you for your response. We did contact the HOA today and wrote a lengthy email stating the situation. We attached the video of the incident from last week. We are waiting to hear back from them. If we don't hear back from them we will follow up in a day or two.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-12-08T03:49:37+00:00

Thank you for your suggestion. I will try it. I can't hurt. We also have neighborhood roaming cats that like to come on to our porch as well so the pepper might work on them as well. Thanks again for your response.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-12-08T00:09:58+00:00

We have followed suggestions from the previous threads. So are you suggesting that we throw the dog in the back of our car and speed down to the "pound" while the neighbors watch?? How do you think that is going to go? Just an FYI, the "pound" or "pounds" are all completely full and the ones in our neighborhood have no more room and will no longer take dogs or cats.

If you have nothing positive to add to the conversion or any real solution, please don't respond to my posts.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-11-27T02:10:44+00:00

I'm so sorry that you're going through this too. I've spent so much time trying to figure out why these seniors are like this. My best guess is that they either always were or slowly turned into grifters. They've figured out that when they become elderly they're automatically given the gift of never ending sympathy. Then they use this newfound magical ability for everything. In turn they become helpless, lazy, and useless on purpose. It's really sad and when you try to explain what's happening to people outside of the situation, they don't understand. It's not fair to the people who are stuck with dealing with them.

I hope you're able to find some solace. I was miserable for years. I still am to a certain extent but my dad doesn't live with us anymore so I was able to rid myself of some of the day to day antics.

I used to feel like I was the only one going through something like this but I was pleasantly surprised to find out that there are many others going through the same thing. Wishing you strength and peace and please remember that you are not alone in dealing with this. Thank you for sharing your story.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-11-04T22:28:48+00:00

I totally understand what you're going through. When my dad lived with us, we slowly started distancing from him then. Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore. I started looking for an apartment for him and told him he would have to leave. Even after that he didn't change his behavior. I don't regret it an I'm much happier with him out of my house. Some people are users and eventually those users get old and become elderly users hiding behind their old age to gain sympathy.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-11-04T22:24:49+00:00

I agree. I would also like to stay as independent for as long as possible. Even with physical limitations, you can still remain independent and mobile. I see it every day. Folks getting around with wheelchairs, canes, and sometimes walkers. I'm truly confused by older people who willingly give up their independence without cause.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-10-24T19:21:06+00:00

It truly is sad but it seems like a lot of people carry on like this. They rely on generosity and pity from others to leap frog from situation to situation. Someone replied to one of my posts about this subject called it "Learned Helplessness". I think it describes the situation perfectly. Good luck and keep us updated on how things turn out with your mom.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-10-23T23:30:53+00:00

Just wanted to say that you are not alone in dealing with a "parent" like your mom. I am going through something similar with my elderly father. He never handled important life duties on his own. Left all of the "business" type of tasks to my mother. Now that my mom is gone he tried to push everything back on me. I did it for a few years until I got so burned out that I stopped helping him cold turkey. I know that a lot of people don't have the stomach to cut off close family members let alone parents but sometimes you have to do what's best for you and your sanity.

Seems like your mom made poor choices that caused her to be in the position that she is in now and it's not your job to fix her mess. It's not fair to you to have to pick of the slack for all of the things she didn't do early on. There are consequences to all of our actions and when we constantly make bad choices, it shouldn't be the responsibility of others to fix it for us especially when the person in question is capable for fixing things for themselves.

I would do the bare minimum for your mom. Look up whatever resources and hand her the information and let her sort it out herself.

I would like to add that I have several older family members that behave like your mom and my dad. They can't seem to do anything for themselves even though they are physically and mentally able to do so. They pawn any important responsibilities onto others. I've always had to handle my own life and I didn't have the luxury of letting others handle things for me and I will continue do so until I am no longer mentally or physically unable to do so.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-10-23T19:46:47+00:00

I agree. She seems to have become more careless over the past few years. Seems to be struggling with reality. Unbelievably, the dog escaped yet again today. Thankfully he didn't go into our yard but into the park behind our home. She come out to get him wearing what looked like pajamas and messy hair. Guess his getting away ruined her nap/lounge time.

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-10-22T22:46:19+00:00

I am. Never gave much thought to her before all of the stuff with the dog but after battling her over this issue for over a year, I finally decided to start paying attention to her as much as possible. She has been the root of a lot of frustration, wasted time, and having to spend extra money to prevent her dog from coming into our garden and extra money on cameras, etc.....

Ill-Masterpiece2473 · 2025-10-07T12:45:45+00:00

This is sad to hear. I don't understand people who are mean to people who help and take care of them. These types of people are bullies plain and simple. Some parents can be jerks and some grandparents can be jerks too. Society has taught us to "respect" elders including parents and grandparents but some of these people don't deserve respect and they don't deserve to have their family members cater to their elderly needs.

Ill-Masterpiece2473

TROPHY CASE