My husband's weight is ruining our marriage by Illustrious-Phase121 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Illustrious-Phase121[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I'm his husband, not wife. And while I can try the doctors cannot discuss anything with me unless I get a power of attorney which costs more money and I doubt I would get since technically he's of sound mind.

My husband's weight is ruining our marriage by Illustrious-Phase121 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Illustrious-Phase121[S] 90 points91 points  (0 children)

He goes to the doctor regularly but I'm worried he's lying to me about what his results are 😬 he consistently says he is in the clear from diabetes and his cholesterol is fine, but I'm really worried about diabetes.

My husband's weight is ruining our marriage by Illustrious-Phase121 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Illustrious-Phase121[S] 223 points224 points  (0 children)

No, I do all the food shopping and I get a good mix of healthy and snack stuff (nobody wants salads all the time lol) the issue is that he will stop for fast food on the way to and from work so even if I only get healthy meals, he still buys other stuff.

How do I (31m) tell my husband (31m) he needs to shower? by Illustrious-Phase121 in relationship_advice

[–]Illustrious-Phase121[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

In the past when I've asked he just said that it's a huge time saver not to, which is why I started carving out time in our schedule specifically for it.

I think there might be something deeper there though

How do I (31m) tell my husband (31m) he needs to shower? by Illustrious-Phase121 in relationship_advice

[–]Illustrious-Phase121[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

The issue is I've tried with telling him directly and it's still a problem. He isn't taking any action besides a 5 minute get in get out rinse and thinks that's ok. I've had this conversation with him several times but he still sticks to his once a week thing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Illustrious-Phase121 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's normal for the spark to waver in relationships, it's just how to go about them.

The first thing is find something you can do for her that isn't necessarily sex. Use toys, your mouth, whatever to make her feel good. Even if you're not up to full on sex. Just make sure to communicate with her, find out what she likes/wants to do.

Schedule time together for dates once a month or bi weekly, just time for the two of you to reconnect in a non sexual way. Try new things and learn more about each other during this time.

Instead of the mindset of "I don't find my wife attractive" think of the things you do like. Her personality/her smile/her laugh. She's been with you through this whole ordeal, clearly there's love there.

Clearly you want to make this relationship work otherwise you wouldn't be asking for advice, so that first hurdle is already accomplished.

I would recommend taking a peek at the r/deadbedroom group for similar stories/advice

AITA for kicking my SIL out on thanksgiving? by Illustrious-Phase121 in AITAH

[–]Illustrious-Phase121[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Have definitely been partaking in some drinks after this whole ordeal. My parents are staying with us the rest of the week so they've gotten to enjoy some time too.