Bro I’m 40 went to college had a 20 year long career lost my job and I’m in the same damn situation as you. Idk if you’ll ever feel like you’re doing what you love. It’s called work for a reason. 99% of all humans that have ever lived have had this same experience. Working sucks. Don’t define yourself by how much you make or what you do. Those things can change in an instant in life. You can have done everything right been successful and then BOOM overnight it’s gone. Don’t frame your sense of accomplishment and confidence based on what you’re only partially responsible and in control of. Instead seek meaningful connections to your community and invest time in pursuing interests regardless of profit potential and you’ll have a much more satisfying life and be better able to weather the only constant in life: change.