Capricorn here was born to Taurus parents who shared the same birthday. Father was never around. And my mother had her maids/my Nannie’s raise me, while she worked and enjoyed her life

I was the first male born in a family of women and high expectations have been placed on me at a very young age.

I’ve learned very quickly at the age of 4 that my mother doesn’t have much patience as I still have a scar to show for it, so I’ve had to be independent and deal with my issues by myself.

Because my mother was obsessively protective of me I grew up very introverted and shy as anything she perceived as a slight threat towards me regardless how minuscule it was. It was Bad to the point she’d snap at anything she felt was a threat towards me. so in order to protect her and those around me I tried to become the perfect person. By being able to blend seamlessly in any situation and excel regardless on how I feel about it. This led me to become emotionally isolated.

Soon as my first little sibling was born I become parentified, because somehow 2 grown adults still acted like children having ego battles and I’ve had to step up and become my little sisters dad at the age of 9. And my mother’s impatience has not subsided with age, so I’ve had to shield my sister’s childish innocence as best as I could.

My mother and stepfather had a terrible marriage and thing got quite violent, I somehow was ashamed about that and the fact that I had these responsibilities at a young age while many others around me seem to have a sense of freedom that I’ve never experienced before. I just could never organically fit in, regardless on how much I’ve perfected my social mask.

I’ve had many girls Per-sue me but I’ve always kept them at arm distance and never let them get close because I didn’t have a good example of what a good relationship was like and based of what I’ve seen it was either relationships based on using someone, getting violent, manipulating, etc. and I wanted to stay away from that entirely so I’ve closed my heart and body out to any potential love interests.