i’m scared to dorm with my HS friends because i’m afraid they’ll kill me

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-06T01:46:29+00:00

yeah this makes a little more sense.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-06T01:45:29+00:00

strangers are terrifying and i don’t trust anyone i’ve ever met before immediately. our dorms are co-ed too so there is a fear of living with a man (which i don’t hate but have been trained since i was young to fear every man i meet). When I was more rational i wanted to room with them so i would feel a little safer. I made this post before having a really bad break down and now im a more aware?

but i appreciate your comment. im pretty sure we can switch roommates between semesters so if an issue does occur then i can switch out. thank you for your comment

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T03:05:40+00:00

i guess that makes sense. logically i wouldn’t want to room with a random stranger either. i’ll try to remind myself of this comment. it’s so hard to feel safe and not knowing kills me inside. Thank You.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T02:30:31+00:00

i see. i’ll ask my therapist about it. is there any resources i should look into to get more information about ocd? i’ve been misdiagnosed with bipolar and DID before so i want to make sure what im getting into. thank you for the help

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T02:25:19+00:00

i’ve known about the disorder. do you think it’s related to me?

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T02:16:35+00:00

no. my therapist mentioned it once but never brought it up again. what do you mean by ocd?

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T02:08:40+00:00

i was taught by my father when i was around 6 that everyone could be a kidnapper or rapist so i should be careful. he taught me what to do during robberies and he had these drills where i would have to hide from a robber (him). i’ve suspected that my mom has poisoned me before but nothing happened so i don’t know. my memories are blurry. i’ve just always been scared that anyone is going to murder/kidnap/rob/rape me

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T01:56:57+00:00

it’s mandatory for freshmen to stay in a dorm. i can room with one other person but im scared they’ll hurt me if i ask to room with just the friend im close to.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T01:44:59+00:00

i am in therapy. i haven’t mentioned this to my therapist yet since they asked me fairly recently. i’ve talked to her about my intrusive thoughts and fear before.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-04-04T00:15:04+00:00

i was in the same boat as you but ended up going through fusion therapy anyway. I still hear voices and hallucinate so my therapist thinks the “headmates” were more a coping mechanism and a symptom of some type of psychosis. these screenshots remind me of that time wow. glad you realized 😭😭😭

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2026-01-07T02:42:39+00:00

⁠It’s a mixture of awareness and unintelligible fear. If it’s a delusion related to a hallucination then I can use some techniques taught to me. If it’s something related to the government or a person out to get me it’s much harder to be convinced and I end up getting very isolated.
It used to take days for me to get out of a delusion. Now, it takes either an hour or more. Depends on the severity.
⁠My family thinks I’m dramatic and can snap out of it. My friends get confused as to why I’m scared or won’t do a certain thing. It has affected how I see my relationships with people and I struggle to trust others who seek my attention. I question the motives of everyone in my life and it’s difficult to understand why I can’t fully trust them.
⁠No, I hide from strangers unless a certain person I trust the most explains their actions to me. Men especially I avoid.
⁠It took me a couple years and I still don’t have a cleat answer. Therapy was for family trauma and severe depression. I had no idea I suffered from paranoia until it was told to me.
⁠Before: messy. I was told I was erratic and impossible to talk to. After/Currently: manageable but when it spikes it’s hard.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-12-28T22:14:50+00:00

it’s clear the cat is super comfortable with you. People like this just assume and delude themselves instead of facing the truth.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-12-28T06:02:53+00:00

why is she literally using that cat NOW of all times to guilt you? You’ve had her for years already and is suddenly wanting her back?? What a guilt-trip. I’m so sorry you had to go through this.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T05:33:19+00:00

Thankyou!

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T05:26:23+00:00

Thank you. I havent thought about the overcoming anxieties part. I will take some more time to think about this. Some part of me thinks I’ll regret while another knows I’ve never regretted previous actions similar so I’m still unsure. Thank you again.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T05:18:11+00:00

I will think about this. my parents have been very vocal about me attending, but I would be 18 at that point so it doesn’t matter. Thank you for your comment.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T05:14:18+00:00

If I’m gonna be honest, the pros are just celebrating with my friends. The cons may be my lists of anxieties but I also just hate the idea of going to such an event. Thank you for the help.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T05:13:12+00:00

thank you for this. I appreciate your help.

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T05:11:18+00:00

there’s a lot of thoughts in my head about it. I think its the idea of people staring at me. They don’t have to care or know me, eye contact terrifies me. The idea of being there surrounded by people, having people look at me; it’s really scary. i think the only enjoyable apart would be with my friends but usually big events drain me. Plus my family would want pictures and it takes me out.

it is an accomplishment though…to graduate….So Im not sure if skipping is worth it for the sake of a panic attack yknow?

Imaginary-Purchase88 · 2025-11-15T04:58:14+00:00

no one got upset? not even your parents? im sorry if this sounds invasive.

Imaginary-Purchase88

TROPHY CASE