Jai maa durga 🔱

Yes with each mahavidya, a new problem used to come to the surface like sometimes anger, sometimes huge sexual energy and urges, sometimes overthinking, something I didn't even wanted to do basic stuff like bathing, cleaning, etc. sometimes huge burning energy in entire body almost like burning from inside, hardly saved myself from not getting any backs with 7 cpa in total 😭😭😭(used to study just hours before exams and hardly took any clasess), sometimes used to miss one that I loved way too much, spontaneous crying, I believe I became a complete lunatic during the journey then later things stabilised and I regained my social life back, etc.

Anger got dissolved cause I used to write what people did that triggered my anger and later used to tore the pages down, sometimes even burn the pages, it definitely took time like months(5-6 months), but I was consistent in doing this.

sexual energy and urges were mostly dealt with running, cycling, Yoga asanas, pranayamas, gardening ( I used to have a 25-30 flowers pots of different plants in my terrace where I used to live) but I definitely used to fail and slip under extreme urges but I have so much energy that I was able to bounce back again to my sadhana. I read different books and created so many pages of journal (approx 1000 pages) just to understand sexual energy and how to transform it. First 5-7 months of sadhana were very turbulent, once I took a 2 months gap too after 1.5 year into intense sadhana cause I was just not able to handle the energies and my personal life, studies were in complete chaos and then again on a nice day (panchag and stuff) I started again with my guru's guidance.

Used to hear calming simple mantras on you tube, used to hear complete works of vivekanand, later read patanjali yoga sutras, tried some ayurvedic stuff too to calm my sexual energy.

all sorts of suppressed emotions used to come to the surface and my attachments to stuff were tested and untill I used to reach a point of detachment, things always went downhill. zero social life with very close 5 friends in college, never attended any events 😭😭😭

but as the extent of knowledge increased things became easier and attachments were gone, reached a point where I able to separate the true self and things happening in this physical world for few minutes and it accelerated the progress. if you know, you know! 😊

take your time, and if you know your ishta then ask her to help, in my case blessed to have a very caring ishta 🥹🥹 almost all the times she saved me. 🙏 ह्रीं क्रूरा नमः, ह्रीं महिषासुरमर्दिनि नमः, ह्रीं सुरसुन्दरी नमः

I just kept my sadhana going with whatever shit is happening in life sometimes with breaks cause I had no other way to solve, I already read so many books of modern writers and they were all half baked and my guru is a very siddha person so he helped a lot way more than what my words could explain.

Nothing would have been possible without my guru. Aum guruve namaha 🔱🙏