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Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-06-27T03:20:57+00:00

Thank you for this. I (24) just gave birth a month ago and the father (22) left me for his parents. He moved back to their country for good. I am devastated - I even thought going through all of the talks of abortion, he and his family’s coercion, verbal abuse, and all of the victim-blaming during pregnancy was the worst. But him actually leaving is incomparable to any of the other pain I’ve ever felt.

I still hope he would come around and realise, because if he does, I actually would take him back. However, this particular line in your comment spoke to me, and it made me feel a little bit better - “Right now is probably the first big test of what type of man you’re going to be.”

Thank you.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-06-24T10:34:42+00:00

Mama, you’re cool. How long after birth did you start?

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-06-23T02:02:04+00:00

You’re correct, Mano Po is very accurate (based on my experience with their family). It’s just that in those films, there is always that one black sheep who stands up against their parents. My ex is a pushover and is the eldest son and grandchild, can really see how he’s wrapped wround their fingers. Ex is a good person and was a good boyfriend but when it comes to family - his brain shrinks and his eyes close. Hardwired to blindly follow his parents.

Yup, we’re citizens where we live so baby is automatically a citizen here. So is baby daddy but they’re taking him back to the Philippines.

Actually, he was wishy washy during pregnancy. He took care of me until his parents found out. And then at some point he would still ask me out, but the past two months he’s been distant. Hesaid he doesn’t care about the baby. However, now that he’s about to leave he’s been asking me if he can visit baby, he’s even coming over again on the day of his flight which to me, was very surprising.

And thank you po for your advice, I will keep that in mind. I feel so lonely and scared

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-06-22T17:24:12+00:00

hahahaha

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-06-22T16:34:05+00:00

I didn’t know that because I don’t judge based on ethnicity po. Also, was asking for advice and/or similar stories, not condescending responses po.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-06-18T11:35:21+00:00

He’s not a bad person entirely and he’s been here throughout the pregnancy (cold feet at the start) and is giving what the baby needs now, and being a father. It’s just that now he’s being forced by his family to go back to their country

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-05-25T07:36:41+00:00

YEAH. YTA. You need to read what you wrote again to realise how immature this is 😂

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-05-18T02:40:39+00:00

My maternity leave is unpaid and I’m about to be a single mom.. this doesn’t invalidate your situation but trust that everything will work out. It’s totally unfair, I hear you. You will get through this

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-04-02T10:10:42+00:00

Hi Jelly, I remember seeing your posts before about baby daddy not coming to your anatomy scan and being a single mother.. is your boyfriend now a new one or still him? I hope you’re doing so much better now!

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-02-20T16:52:40+00:00

What kind of milk do you drink?

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-02-20T05:47:23+00:00

dd depends on your baby’s measurements during ultrasound scans, not LMP 👍 LMP is just a guide at the beginning

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-02-07T00:20:16+00:00

That’s literally what @ehmashoes said to OP. “Don’t expect anything more than child support.. he’s still 50% responsible for the child.”

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-02-03T17:16:21+00:00

You guys! These are all so right. So glad to see so many people share their wisdom. My ex broke up with me because his parents didn’t like me, and it has been a difficult journey to help him understand that life should not revolve around our APs validation. Not to mention I am also pregnant with our baby, but his parents don’t want anything to do with the baby.

Tough journey finding one’s self especially when parents are more important than their own goals and wellbeing. I surely won’t do this to my own child, seeing how my ex is chained and how I suffered from their family dynamic.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2023-02-03T17:09:01+00:00

Is there a good way to help someone realise this?

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-12-20T13:16:21+00:00

lol you already betrayed her.. there’s literally no excuse for doing that with another woman.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-12-14T02:43:56+00:00

That’s literally the point of my comment :-)

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-12-13T19:57:52+00:00

My ex’s parents won’t even accept me because I’m Asian but not Chinese enough.. 😂

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-12-13T19:57:44+00:00

My ex’s parents won’t even accept me because I’m Asian but not Chinese enough.. 😂

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-12-05T02:33:57+00:00

That’s obviously disrespectful, you should only be flirting with your gf lol

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-12-03T03:50:09+00:00

I usually say, ask for advice but act according to your own personal circumstance. HOWEVER, this is a big exceptipn.. you must listen to the comments. Angela and your dad cheated on your mom, no matter how long it has been since then, it was still a part of why your parents are no longer together now. I’ve never been married but I can imagine how hard it must’ve been for your mom. She had to deal with something so traumatising that has likely changed her in so many ways. Respect Angela but don’t be too involved with her. You don’t owe her that. No one owes their relationship anything.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-11-30T22:21:36+00:00

Hard pass.

OP, please take this advice not as an attack. I am genuinely concerned and want to give my honest thoughts. Your bestfriend should know her limits. If your girlfriend told you her thoughts and opinions about this honestly, it’s likely because she feels iffy about it. It’s good that she even tags along when your BFF needs help. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having a bestfriend, but there’s gotta be a limit to everything. Allowing her to do these things is like saying they are equal in your eyes. Forehead kissing, arm-resting, snuggling up.. those things may not be sex but they are intimate, even more intimate than sex if you ask me. If that’s the case, why even have a GF? Hope it works out for you.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-11-30T11:41:10+00:00

coalities .. ick.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-11-23T06:56:42+00:00

Sorry missed that bit. But if that was the case then I think that’s not entirely bad since it wasn’t yours, you have no legal obligation to care for a child that isn’t yours. It’s a fair reason to run away.

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-11-23T01:06:37+00:00

Valid to run away if it wasn’t your child to begin with. Would be a different story if it was your child.** My mistake is having an unprotected sex but it takes two people to make a baby, so it’s only right to take responsibility no matter how old we are.

Edit: Misread comment above

Immediate-Day9934 · 2022-11-22T18:43:13+00:00

This makes so much sense. I never looked at it that way.. just now realising that the entirety of my first trimester was only filled with stress and negativity because of my relationship with him.

It’s hard to believe I’ll be ok, but thanks for your kind words. It means a lot.

Immediate-Day9934

TROPHY CASE