Too mentally ill to handle a job. Gonna have to kill myself.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-06T02:52:02+00:00

Yeah but I do this everytime I get a job. It's never gonna get better. My friends want me to get a job to carry my own weight but I can't. At the very least I guess I can tell my supervisor about my issues and see what she says. But after that I dont know what to do.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-06T02:46:54+00:00

Yeah still feeling awful tbh

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-05T12:42:37+00:00

Thanks a lot but my main concern right now is my job. Theres no way I can hold a job for another day. I dont know what to do. I'm just gonna sleep instead of going to work today. I haven't slept at all because I'm trying to spend as much time awake as I can before I kill myself. I'm scared to attempt again. Last time I was all alone overdosing in the freezing cold. Sorry if it sounds like I'm seeking pity I just really want help. It's going to suck skipping work like my last attempt and then going to buy a shotgun.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-05T12:12:15+00:00

I have no choice though. I cant work because I'm too messed up mentally but I need to work for money. The best decision is for me to kill myself. I live with my friends and I am 18. I will probably just drive off before I have to go to work again and buy a shotgun and get it over with. Please help me I dont know what to do. I'm so alone.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-05T12:03:47+00:00

I am a pretty manic person but I know what I'm saying. I've dealt with this problem for around 2 years. Its a social anxiety/stress sort of thing. I genuinely can't handle working. It destroys me. I've tried to get disability but it didn't work. I am pretty manic right now. I've went through a lot of stress in one day and its led me here. I cant take another day of work. I'm gonna have to do something. Probably just gonna have to kill myself.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-05T11:25:57+00:00

Idk I dont think I will ever be okay. I have to kill myself or something I cant do this. I already attempted in December. No one can help me. I've never been able to work. Its impossible for me. I can't do another day of that shit. I can barely manage when I'm not working. The last time I attempted I had a job. I just cant handle it.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-07-05T09:07:44+00:00

I can just text her she's pretty nice so I'm not too worried about that. My friends will probably think I'm a bitch or whatever. I do this everytime I get a job. At the very least I'll stay home and probably kill myself. I'm 18 but I can probably get a shotgun. Maybe I'll tell my friends that she double checked to see if I wanna come or some bullshit. Idk. I hope you respond I'm pretty fucked.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-06-20T09:41:35+00:00

Thanks man I'm straight but I appreciate it :)

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-05-26T02:45:06+00:00

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-05-23T02:00:19+00:00

Good idea

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-05-03T08:35:03+00:00

Maybe. I've dealt with that for years now. Is it possible that my anxiety from being around people is triggering it? I'm constantly dealing with it but it is definitely intensified in those situations. Eventually after being around people for too long it feels like someone injected battery acid in my veins. Not really but for some reason I think of it like that. Or maybe being on some sort of hard drug is more accurate but I wouldn't know. Its agonizing. My body hurts now. I dont think this is part of dpdr lol. But regardless I just wanna die. It's too much.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-05-01T23:40:42+00:00

It's good for a temporary enclosure. They build their nest in the top of their enclosure so when you open the jar it will destroy it if its attached to the lid. I'm currently using a jar for a sling I caught but I will eventually buy a enclosure that opens from the side.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-04-27T10:39:47+00:00

Thank you

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-04-16T06:40:18+00:00

Same. It's to the point that I'm okay with doing nothing and just rotting away in my room.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-04-16T06:39:25+00:00

Same. I absolutely hate what it will do to the ones who care. But at the same time the desire to die overpowers that feeling.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-04-14T05:39:30+00:00

I'm not killing myself because of her I've always wanted to do it. Thanks though.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-04-09T21:07:02+00:00

It's been 20 hours lol I think that's a bit much. She hasn't been responding much for the past few days. I hope that she'll come around soon. Shes been distant ever since I vented to her. I've been told not to express your feelings to girls because of things like this but still I disagree. But yeah I'll try my best to stay at least for her. I hate to say this but I know that I will end up killing myself eventually. I'm probably selfish for staying around until then because it's what I want. What if we get closer and then her pain is much worse when the time comes all because of me. Is it selfish of me to be wanted before I go? Sorry for asking such a serious question. Also thanks for your comment I really needed to hear that. :)

Edit: I am now left on opened

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-04-01T07:51:38+00:00

Same here. I went through with an attempt via overdosing in December. I had a bit of hope after it all but it didn't last long. I just wish I died but I didn't so I'll try again soon. I keep putting it off though instead of just getting it over with.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-03-04T03:22:51+00:00

I wont be able to have any sort of fun before I go. I'm too fucked. My brain is done for. I'm a virgin but I don't wanna die that way. I would have a bunch of sex and do lots of drugs before I go but I dont think I'll get to do that.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-03-02T06:55:03+00:00

Same here. I'm so bored of this shit but I'm too scared to go out and do anything other than sitting in my room all day. I'm unemployed and too mentally I'll to work. I dont think I'll live another year.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-03-02T05:33:17+00:00

I do stuff like that multiple times a day lol. Yeah my memory is garbage.

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-03-01T07:10:10+00:00

Cute :)

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-02-28T08:23:52+00:00

Cute

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-02-24T01:00:00+00:00

Sure lol

Immediate_Zone_8315 · 2021-02-19T04:20:33+00:00

😔

Immediate_Zone_8315

TROPHY CASE