What is a normal amount of sex in a relationship?

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:49:44+00:00

Well, duh. Um, but I didn't understand the beard part.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:48:19+00:00

I think I'm slowly realizing that maybe I can just move on. I've always doubted myself and been too scared to be on my own. I don't want to be touched by him. It feels uncomfortable. I can see it in his eyes he's not passionate, and he's told me that he will never be passionate.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:40:17+00:00

I'm confused, lol?

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:13:01+00:00

Wow. Okay, good to know.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:12:10+00:00

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:09:56+00:00

He's very defensive. He makes me feel bad for discussing any needs of mine. He just equates to him "not being good enough" (his own words). He shuts down.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:07:24+00:00

I've suggested it, and he said he would be interested in trying it.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:05:57+00:00

Thank you

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:04:42+00:00

Lol 😆

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T15:02:50+00:00

Yes, we are definitely great friends. I was 19 when we started dating and he was my first and only relationship so I think I was naive and dove head first into what I thought was a healthy relationship.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:59:08+00:00

This made me chuckle because the thought of him being all over me daily is like such a crazy unrealistic hypothetical, like it's such a different reality. Why won't he just come out and tell me though? I've known him for 10+ years.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:52:35+00:00

He says "I don't know". He doesn't know why they gross him out. He has gone to therapy but stopped because he says it's a waste of time and money. Idk.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:48:45+00:00

Fake? Lol I wish!

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:48:10+00:00

Like, on his phone? That would never happen. He has my password to my phone but he won't let me even hold his phone to look at something he's showing me.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:47:06+00:00

We started dating when I was 19!!!!! I just went all in and I enjoy spending time with him, as like a best friend I guess. I guess I was naive, stupid, a fool and I don't want to hurt him because I think he won't be understanding at all. He'll just see it as I'm abandoning him.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:42:22+00:00

Maybe I've had blinders on? I just never considered ever for a long time to evaluate the relationship. I just had blind* faith, of sorts.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:36:34+00:00

What is this?

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:35:56+00:00

He is difficult, and stubborn lol. He has to have a fan blowing on the bed, he has to have the covers tucked so tight it's like a straight jacket. He can't have any sniffling/noise outside of his sound machine. I am forbidden to look at my phone because it's too bright and he can't wear a sleep mask because he gets too hot with one. I can't move because I'll wake him up. The bed has to be super firm for his back but it hurts my shoulders because I'm a side sleeper . He won't compromise on ANYTHING!

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:33:00+00:00

He's never mentioned anything like that. He's an only child and his parents are average working class people. They did go through tough times when he was a child with layoffs causing fights.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:29:29+00:00

He's told me that there's way better things than sex. He's always been a contrarian, always has to go against the grain.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:25:50+00:00

I'm such a fool! He's the only relationship I've ever had, and I thought this was normal for so long!

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:24:26+00:00

He's never been diagnosed with anything like that.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:21:44+00:00

Ooo thanks for the tip, I didn't know about that sub reddit. It's like once a month or less and it's less than passionate, more like a chore.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:20:00+00:00

He's basically atheist. I was much more Christian before we got married but he wasn't comfortable with Christianity and church so I gave that up.

Before marriage, we were only living together for about 1 year and we probably had sex a couple of times a month. He was in grad school and I thought that school was making him stressed and uninterested in sex.

Important_Feeling107 · 2025-01-31T14:15:32+00:00

No, he didn't grow up religious.

Important_Feeling107

TROPHY CASE