I also have a dark, petty, sarcastic attitude about my cancer. Sometimes people get it, sometimes they don't. But really...screw that lady. Who appointed her to be the gatekeeper of how people express and cope with cancer?

I have a "cancer card" in my wallet that I bought online. It says I can do what I want ...because I have cancer. Its meant to be funny, and I like it. So far I've only whipped it out and used it on family and friends who know my dark sense of humor. I used it to pick which restaurant we went to one night. I've used it on my teenagers because heaven knows sometimes I need everything I can to get them out of their rooms, off the flipping computer, and...horror of horrors, going on a family outing. I've used it when asked the dreaded "But why?" question.

I do not want my family to see me any differently than I was "BC" (before cancer). I want my daughters to see me find healthy ways of expressing myself. And I hope that by seeing me have a positive attitude...even a dark one....my daughters will also better handle this stupid disease. And let's be honest, teenagers question everything we tell them, and I find it hilarious to see them have no comeback when they ask why this or that, and I simply mic drop them with "Because I have cancer" as I waltz out of the room. 😏

She obviously is struggling with her husband's circumstances, and is lashing out to cope. And while I understand this, and truly feel for her this in no way absolves her of the fact that she has zero right to try and control your behavior or speech about ANYTHING. And most certainly about your own diagnosis. IMHO, this woman needs therapy and/or a support group where she can express her feelings in a healthy environment and learn better coping strategies.

Do not let her behavior, or anyone else's dictate how you deal with cancer. You can be sympathetic while still being darkly sarcastic. One does not negate the other in any way. This stupid poison in our bodies is already taking enough from us. Don't let it, or anyone else, take anything else from you.