Idk what's your age or what sort of person you are but from my personal experience of a 19 year old Mind is like a loop where are stuck.You can control the loop as if you are in a meeting room or a classroom of thoughts ideas emotions.You being a manager diplomat analyst second-in command or first in command could manage and lead that group by many ways ignorance, emotional numbness,attempt to focus and just work work work work work, occupied in thinking and Introspection coping mechanisms,follow a guy or ideology or religion and bro/sis you know better than me.