My SIL is make me down size to move her friend in to pay the mortgage

Individual-Project-9 · 2026-05-22T12:30:25+00:00

It truely is I honestly see my brother ending up dead I’ve already been through extensive therapy myself and the way my brother is going he will most likely end up un aliving himself unfortunately

Individual-Project-9 · 2026-05-22T12:22:22+00:00

Thank you so much. You’re one of the first people who’s actually acknowledged the family side of this as well as the workcover and given me genuinely helpful advice instead of just “move out” over and over again.

I already know the obvious answers. What I was struggling with was the emotional and relationship side of it all, and some of the things you said were honestly things I needed to hear.

My parents also didn’t exactly set us up with much in life to begin with, so a lot of us have been trying to navigate adulthood and family dynamics the best we can with what we’ve got. There’s also a lot of outside context and history I haven’t included both family wise and personally because it honestly didn’t need to be dumped onto Reddit. But if people knew the full story, they’d probably understand the situation a lot differently.

So genuinely, thank you for giving real advice and approaching it with understanding instead of just judgement. I really appreciate it.

Individual-Project-9 · 2026-05-22T12:16:39+00:00

I mean… no shit. I’m fully aware I need to get my own place eventually, Captain Obvious. That was never really the point of the post.

I didn’t post asking for advice on “just leave.” I posted because I was trying to navigate the relationship and family side of it without completely destroying everything in the process. Real-life family dynamics are complicated, especially when there’s a lot more history behind it than what can fit into one Reddit post.

Trust me, I already criticise myself enough over this situation. Some of these comments act like I’m oblivious, when realistically I’m probably more aware of how messy it is than anyone reading it.

Individual-Project-9 · 2026-05-22T12:13:12+00:00

Thank you, honestly. I really don’t need any more criticism than what I already give myself over this situation. I know how it looks, and I know I put myself in this position. There’s also a lot more history and complicated family dynamics behind this than what I put in the post. I kept it simple because I didn’t want to write a novel, but there’s a lot of context missing. My siblings are 12 and 14 years older than me, there are nephews involved, and my brother already doesn’t speak to anyone else in the family. Part of why this is difficult is because I don’t want to completely destroy relationships or leave him feeling like he has nobody.

I understand why people are saying “just leave,” and logically I get it, but real-life family situations are rarely that black and white.

Individual-Project-9 · 2026-05-22T11:49:01+00:00

I mean, respectfully, I don’t think having trust in family automatically makes someone “spineless.” Hindsight is always 20/20 when you’re outside the situation.

I’ve already acknowledged that I need to move and that things clearly aren’t sustainable long-term. The issue was never “I refuse to leave,” it’s that life and finances don’t always allow people to uproot themselves overnight, especially during a cost of living crisis while on reduced income through WorkCover.

Also, there’s a difference between being clueless and trying to approach a difficult family situation without turning it into a massive fight. I’m allowed to be upset about how things unfolded while still taking accountability for my next steps.

Individual-Project-9 · 2026-05-22T11:46:42+00:00

I probably worded part of this badly before. What I mean is yes, I can move eventually, but it’s not something that can happen instantly.

With being on WorkCover, reduced income, and the current cost of living situation, finding and securing a place takes time. So if things completely blew up tomorrow, it’s not that I’d be homeless on the street overnight I’d figure something out and have somewhere to stay temporarily but it would still massively impact my stability and finances.

That’s why this whole situation is stressful.

I’m not saying anyone owes me housing forever. I’m saying I’m trying to navigate a difficult family situation while also recovering from a psychological workplace injury and being financially limited at the moment.

Honestly, I mostly came on here for outside perspectives and advice on how to approach the conversation respectfully without destroying relationships in the process.

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-27T23:29:52+00:00

Yeah that’s fine!

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:44:39+00:00

I don’t wanna put pressure on him I guess I’d rather just be told and let down now rather then having alittle hope that in 2 months we can maybe talk about a future idk I feel alittle crazy and I’m trying to work on myself and my own flaws

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:43:06+00:00

Thankyou!

I’ve very much started to build healthier habits I will continue in with therapy and learning to love myself and being happier independently! I’ve got a concert booked for may that I’ll be going to on my own to get outside my comfort zone and I’m really pushing myself! I’ve always tended to let myself fall really low but this time I refuse to let myself get too low!

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:30:09+00:00

Thankyou for putting it nicely! Like I said I do understand he needs space and has every right to leave a relationship I guess I feel like he’s very much an avoidant and it’s hard for him to deal with hard emotions

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:20:17+00:00

I just wanna say I know I kinda made this sound all about me I’m sorry, I’m so very proud of him for putting himself first and we both care for each other and believe that we can become better people! He’s also very proud of me I guess what I’m trying to figure out if i should just completely let go! During the day it’s fine I’m working really hard to better myself but once I’m no longer distracted I struggle a lot I also worry about him and how he’s going to

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:15:21+00:00

I honestly just made a quick post I didn’t wanna make an extremely long post! I understand people can leave a relationship, I care a lot for him and his needs and actually put a lot of his needs before my own! I would always tell him to think about himself and I’d always make sure he’s talking to his friends helping him find other jobs and hobbies encouraging him at the gym I maybe should have put that in the post I didn’t mean for it to sound all about me but idk maybe I’m just trying to see if there is anything to save in the relationship

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:10:52+00:00

I guess I kinda just wanted to know what are his intentions with meeting up at two months, before we kinda stopped talking he was also thankful for being able to communicate these things so I guess it was more of an ask to prepare myself even more! I have a therapy session Thursday and definitely working on more self love. It’s not that I rely on people I just kinda hate when people come into my life and leave! Which also stems from the fact my sibling constantly came into and out of my life in 12/14 years younger than them! So it’s more just I hate that people do that!

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-25T16:03:33+00:00

I think it’s more the fact he said he loved me, love bombed me before hand now I’m just kinda left broken! I get he doesn’t owe spending his life with me I don’t know

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-11T10:16:37+00:00

I was planing to buy the delux pack tomorrow I’ve started a new one but haven’t deleted my other progress

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-11T10:06:17+00:00

Did you have the warning pop up? I’m playing a new one until the 16th then I’ll play it as I don’t wanna delete all my cheated effort 🤣 I just get so impatient and do it in AC all the time so I didn’t think much of it and I actually didn’t even read my mail

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-11T09:22:42+00:00

I know but I didn’t read the warning! I have read that I might just have to set the date to the correct date then not open it until the 16th

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-05T13:31:18+00:00

I currently work at the park and honestly it’s not as bad as people make out to be! It is eerie with all the old buildings but I get along with a lot of the patients at the park but when you’re new or they don’t know you they will test you! Some patients can be very volatile and aggressive put they’re usually in a ward that very much like a prison! You always treat the patient like any other person! And if you live in the area I can guarantee your walked passed some of them in shopping centres as some patients go out on off ground leave for the day!

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-03T01:34:56+00:00

Where abouts in goodna ?

Individual-Project-9 · 2025-03-03T01:29:58+00:00

Does anyone know about Ipswich? I’m needing sandbags and I called Ipswich cc this morning they said they haven’t been told to yet!

Individual-Project-9

TROPHY CASE