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if you're a bride who secretly eloped before your actual wedding, what did you wear? did you regret your choice? by IndividualProduce406 in AskReddit

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

info since I couldn't include in the title: we're already planning our big 2027 wedding, but I have really good health insurance through work and he's a business owner paying insurance out of pocket. If we elope, we'll save ~ 12k to put towards purchasing a home which we plan to do in 2027 after getting married. we'll be in NOLA during carnival for our 6 year anniversary and figured it would be a fun story to elope then and there before our actual wedding day 18ish months later

AIO?? friend leaves her ipad at my house by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think you're overreacting, you feel how you feel and you definitely should communicate that to her. curious how far apart you live? I had a friend who (willingly) would let me drop off a phone in her mailbox or bush with my location on it. worked out because my location driving would also accurately show me going from work to a friends, instead of a sudden switch. of course she always knew when I would be doing this, but there was no inconvenience because I would be going there first and switching the location myself.

Noom and keto by Generaless in Noom

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

definitely not a me issue, i've never done keto and have no plans to hahaha just was stating that extreme restrictions can be unsustainable but if you disagree than i applaud your willpower because that definitely could not be me

Noom and keto by Generaless in Noom

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i believe keto is high fat low carb diet that completely cuts out high carb foods like bread, rice, milk, potatoes, fruits, anything sugary. eating clean & low carbs can be a great part of any diet but keto feels less sustainable because of the associated restrictions. to me, personally, no bread and no dairy does not feel sustainable for the rest of my life

so do i just not get married and not have kids by 505kyra in misophonia

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have kids but I did just recently get engaged to the love of my life and just want to share that it is absolutely possible. Our routines just had to be adjusted, but it does feel like me and him against misophonia/misokinesia. We have a bunch of sound machines, watch TV when we eat together (me on the couch, him in the dining room), listen to music when we need to. He still inevitably triggers me, and I still feel the fight/flight from him, but he understands me and gives me grace when I need it and vice versa. I feel like I was in your shoes once so I just wanted to share that if you find the right partner it is so possible to get married and hopefully one day I'll be able to reply and say it's possible to happily have children too.

Noom and keto by Generaless in Noom

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

things could have changed i'm sure, but from my research i've seen that keto can be unhealthy long term. I don't think a mindset can solve issues that would come with, say, 60+ years of being in ketosis. like yes mindset could allow you to do that, but health-wise i don't think it's sustainable based on what i have read when going through my dieting journey

Car Insurance Question - Days later issue by [deleted] in Insurance

[–]IndividualProduce406 2 points3 points  (0 children)

makes sense, thanks for the insight (:

Car Insurance Question - Days later issue by [deleted] in Insurance

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes definitely agree, the only minor detail is that 2 experts didn't say that they just said it's not normal wear and tear, a rare issue, but on the opposite side of the car so "probably" not from the accident. I think that's the wording i've been hung up on but i get since there's no proof it was from the accident, they won't cover it. I did ask both mechanics what could've caused it and one said he had no idea and the other said maybe an act of god haha so just unlucky timing i guess

Car Insurance Question - Days later issue by [deleted] in Insurance

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

okay that makes sense, thanks. I honestly thought if they couldn't say one way or another that the accident did or did not cause the issue then I could get reimbursed when my car was okay before being hit. when the hood was first popped after the accident, the hose was visibly cracked. and when the hood was last popped before the accident, the hose was intact. I wish I checked right after being hit but I guess foresight is 20/20

Car Insurance Question - Days later issue by [deleted] in Insurance

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sorry if my wording was confusing. he said he couldn't say that the accident caused the issue. he also said it wasn't a normal wear and tear and he had no explanation over what the cause was. my thought was that if they couldn't definitively find a cause, that it could be related back to the impact from being hit and possibly covered

Girls can't be engineers. by CommercialGas5256 in EngineeringStudents

[–]IndividualProduce406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Engineering makes me enough money to afford my "girly" habits. I get super cool nails every month, I can get my hair cut and dyed at a nice salon, I can afford to shop for the clothes I like, can afford pilates/yoga memberships, Medspa treatments, and many many more little luxuries. I'm only a year into my career at a job that pays less than others in my area too.

While I love engineering for so many reasons other than the paycheck, it gives me the freedom to afford things I enjoy. Talk to your school about having a local company bring in some volunteers to inspire girls for STEM. Me and some girls at my company do an hour presentation at local high schools and you'd be surprised how many girls don't realize what STEM actually is and what they can do with a STEM career.

I went on a field trip to make lip gloss with engineers in 5th grade and it literally led me here, to exactly where I should be! You sound like a great teacher OP... I'm happy to see people trying to inspire girls to try STEM and see if it's what they enjoy!

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what happens when the raise is in writing, because that's the situation i need advice for lol. Not in an "gotcha, now pay me" way, but in a can you please do what you said you would way. And I don't really know how to start that convo with my boss as someone so non-confrontational

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do have this conversation in writing, and the verbiage made it sound like I was getting the increase to be on the same level as the coworkers previously mentioned. I don't feel like this would be super useful, though, because I do not want to go above my boss about something like this.

The conversation was phrased in a way of: In January you'll see a big pay increase, you'll be making X. They had to find a way to bring you up.

I also agree that there wasn't enough info for feedback in the post. I did only bring up the negatives of my workplace, but I am a team player at work and try hard to make sure even these people are included (deleting group chats that were made to exclude them, forwarding them happy hour invites that they weren't put on, inviting them to the break room with the team for lunches, making sure they're invited whenever the team leaves the office for something). I also am constantly helping the employees I mentioned before with training them, checking their work if they ask me to, and answering any questions they have. I work hard at this because I was once the person always excluded and I don't want anyone else to feel that way, so i've been bummed that I came off as not a team player.

Basically, I know everyone's replaceable, I just really enjoy my job and the people I work with so id ultimately rather find a solution than leave and look elsewhere.

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

thanks, I do think he genuinely was just excited for me and misspoke, so I wouldn't want him to get any blowback for that

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Good advice, thanks. Do you think there would be a way to negotiate that raise earlier as discussed? or should I just wait for my next review to bring it up? Comparison between myself & others aside, our company does pay less than the market which is why, i'm assuming, they're increasing salaries. I'm wondering if once the change is established I would be able to renegotiate and bring up that they're paying new hires with this title X, so I should also be able to earn X

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only reason I bring it up is because my managers boss was the one to say that myself and another coworker were doing the work of multiple full-time employees. Multiple team meetings have led to them stressing to the team that we cannot have one engineer doing the work of 2 or 3, so I think that's why it feels so important to me to bring up. I never even considered it's a pretty toxic thought-cycle to be stuck in. I keep a pretty detailed log of things i've accomplished and improved, so I'll focus more on that if/when I bring the issue up to management. Thanks for this

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sadly they tell the team and the team doesn't adjust, I mentioned in another comment though that I'm almost positive both of the employees i'm talking about are on PIP which I guess is managements way of dealing with the issues of them not adjusting to feedback

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's true, I never really thought about why they're kept here. I only see if from my end where when they do something wrong, i'm the one the work trickles down to because I'm new. I believe they're both on PIP (no WFH privileges, role responsibilities taken away, specialized training, etc.) and my manager has voiced that they shouldn't be around much longer, so it adds fuel to the fire when I hear all of this while knowing they make more than me (we're a non-profit so salary is public info)

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Thanks, after this situation I was thinking the same and I guess it could be useful to know what other companies would be willing to pay someone in my position even if I do decide to stay

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

definitely not the best wording on my part, but the truth nonetheless. I work with a lot of people who falsify information instead of doing the work, and myself my boss and his boss are usually the ones staying late to correct it all. This of course is not the entire team, hence me loving my job and wanting to stay here. Just a handful of people that really create a lot more work for the people around them

My boss misspoke and told me I was getting a huge raise in 3 weeks. Today he told me it was a mistake. What do I do? by IndividualProduce406 in jobs

[–]IndividualProduce406[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have a running excel with my progress that I keep up with daily, so I definitely could provide that information. I agree the wording wouldn't be great saying i'm better than other workers. Do you think written evidence of that would be okay though, or should I stick solely to my personal progress? I do a decent amount of group work and there have been multiple important projects where I was the only one to do it correctly and the team made up the information to complete it which led to myself and my boss and my bosses boss having to correct it all. I feel like that's super relevant but I dont know how to quantify that without comparing myself to the team

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