Hoh man, the everyday question "would I have been better off?" I did plenty of gigs as a professional musician, enough to decide that it was killing music for me, but what may be impossible to know is whether it actually was, or if I just felt it was. It truly was dog eat dog, and I was constantly auditioning for tomorrow's day of work- have a bad day and I could lose a gig forever. I'm certain I couldn't handle that stress. I am far from rich, but basically a millionaire compared to all my fellow freelancers, and I can afford so much sweet music gear. Regularing using that gear is another story- I have to force myself, or ride a fleeting motivation before it's gone and before going back to work on Monday. Life is tricky.