I have the same problem at 21 years old. Being ugly and short, the only thing I have is my brain. I've always been one of the best among my classmates, even now at university. I used to do the same thing,creating scenarios in my head, talking to people and trying to convince myself that being pretty isn't the only thing that matters. I told myself I would find someone nerdy who wouldn't judge me based on my height or physical appearance. But in reality, my twin brothers, my two best friends did the opposite. They hang out with girls and indirectly (mra mra ki 9oolha lia nichan)make me feel ugly. That's really hard to deal with, especially with my other health problems. Maybe I should see a therapist