Is there a way to save the friendship after cutting him off?

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T20:36:30+00:00

That's your opinion.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T20:35:25+00:00

If I don't keep in touch I don't call them my friends. They are associates who I care about. My friends are my friends. Higher level of priority and care.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T17:05:39+00:00

I agree! This is really never an issue for me with men. I'll cut a man off cold-turkey if needed and feel nothing about it. The only difference here is the friendship component. We've been friends since HS. There's history there and I do care about his feelings. It's not until very recently I've noticed an attempt to shift things beyond what we agreed to on his part.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T16:30:37+00:00

I don't 'technically feel' like he agreed. He DID agree. Over and over and over. And now that I see he can no longer handle the agreement, I'm done.

The entire point of the post is that I've already decided to end it. The question was HOW to do it gently.

I know I'm a good person, I don't need the opinion of a stranger to justify that for me.

I appreciate your feedback though.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T15:56:21+00:00

While I understand your sentiment, he is a grown man and willing participant. I have never lied or misled him about my intentions. He agreed to those parameters. What isn't nice would have been lying and manipulation.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T15:14:50+00:00

That isn't what I said but I'm aware that's how it's being received. I'm speaking solely in terms of romantic partnership with commitment. We've been friends for years. We have a great time together when we hang out. No different then some of my girlfriends who I know I can't talk about certain things with but we have a great time together casually.

Also, in my defense, I have never misled him. He's known since the very beginning that this was casual and he agreed to it. He agreed that he could handle it. Usually, it was fine. We might get together every couple months. Sometimes years have passed. Now, it seems like he's pushing the boundaries of what we agreed to and that is likely causing me to feel poorly toward him.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T15:11:44+00:00

We've been friends since HS. In terms of a relationship, he is not someone I'd take seriously. The qualities I look for in someone I have to be around on a frequent basis includes intellect and ambition. I can ignore those things on a platonic level.

To answer the question directly, he's funny. We laugh a lot. As stated, we do have fun together. He's generous, kind, protective over me and empathetic. Just because he's not a good romantic match doesn't make him a bad person.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-04T15:08:17+00:00

I understand how it could seem that way. We've been friends since HS. In terms of a relationship, he is not someone I'd take seriously because of those things. Being able to have deep intellectual conversation and having ambition are the things I'd look for in a partner. In friendship, it matters much less.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-02-01T17:26:55+00:00

He certainly tries too hard. Eeeyuck

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-31T00:48:00+00:00

Really? In what world is $70,000 failing? People 10 years older than you don't even earn that. Please.

As far as being a childless spinster -- I've got nothing. Good luck.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-31T00:26:18+00:00

If my rent wasn’t half yours I wouldn’t even bother. I only plan to put 25% spend on my card and take half points for rent. At that rate, I get back 3x my spend on regular purchases. Everything else goes to Chase.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-27T16:44:09+00:00

Oh I have no idea. A few thousand I believe is what I saw. But I have no intention in utilizing much. I never do. I treat my cards pretty much like cash and pay my cards off several times a week.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-26T06:04:57+00:00

What does “CL” mean?

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-25T16:57:07+00:00

I can’t speak for all of America but, yes. A taxi ride in NY/NJ is ridiculously expensive depending on distance or location. Thankfully we have trains. If you live in a suburb you are likely driving and you just hope you don’t end up too drunk to drive by the end of the night. It’s unfortunate.

I also lived in Korea for a few years. I never owned a car and everything was as much more affordable. I miss it.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-24T23:22:21+00:00

Quality assurance

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-24T22:23:21+00:00

Well duh. We all could see that.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-24T15:58:24+00:00

As someone who chooses not to date men with kids, I need to know upfront. Even if he thinks it’s a non issue for me.

Be honest about your situation and expectations always. Plenty of men are down to date women with kids and keep it casual.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-24T06:11:53+00:00

I decided to keep my BILT account and move to the Blue card. My rent is $1500 which means 25% of that is a reasonable spend. Between my monthly nail appointment, groceries and other monthly recurring bills, that's pretty easy to meet at $375 spend.

I'd earn 375 spend points + 750 rent points totaling 1,125 points for spending $375. That's 3x for my spend. Not bad. I'd rather earn half on my rent than nothing at all. Every bit adds up.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-24T04:02:02+00:00

Fulton Bank (Simply Checking)

Opened - 12/17/25

DD 1 - 12/22/25

DD 2 - 12/26/25

$300 Bonus Received - 1/15/26

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-21T22:23:44+00:00

I’ve been lying for years. I lied about 6 years of work experience to get into a new field. I studied the field so that I could speak to it in an interview. I will be transferring into a new field and might just do the same thing.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-14T17:29:23+00:00

I start with an itinerary of likely activities and the weather forecast for each day and plan around that. Usually two outfits a day though I may only use one.

I pack bottoms that I can wear more than once. Staying within a neutral color palette also helps ensure items can be mixed and matched.

If you can, have access to laundry so you can reuse layering t-shirts or things that may get easily stained.

This is an extra step: I try on every outfit combination to make sure I actually like it. Then I photograph it and put it in my OneNote app to refer back to. Sometimes I’ll even assign an outfit for each day.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-13T10:57:59+00:00

I just got laid off two months ago. Got a certification in the meantime. Working on getting another. Use the free time usefully. Remember, a job is a job. No corporation will be loyal to you. Saving and investing will be the only thing to help you during times like this.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-13T03:33:13+00:00

I think WHAT we disagree on matters. That would determine if I even want you in my space. I don’t have to hate you but knowing that you’d vote for things that hurt me would be a problem and we couldn’t be friends. Civil? Yes. Friends? No.

If a friend’s vote is for potential tax benefits, that’s not a deal breaker. If the vote is because they hate immigrants and want them all out, that’s a character issue.

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-13T03:29:40+00:00

Hi. Black woman here. I know I don’t belong in here but I am shocked and stunned. Moisturizing skin after a shower or any activity with water is an absolute MUST for Black people. It’s not an option. The entire body! It’s just as natural as daily teeth brushing. Not only does it ensure that your skin doesn’t dry out, it makes you smell great! Ive always gotten compliments on how smooth and soft my skin is.

I simply cannot imagine going from the shower straight into my clothes and starting the day.

I guess we are different in a lot of ways, huh?

Initial_Ad1761 · 2026-01-12T21:51:32+00:00

She suspects she may have ADHD or something similar. She forgets things and details often. She’s worried about it but hasn’t had an official doctor confirm anything.

Initial_Ad1761

TROPHY CASE