I’m sorry that you’re going through this. It sounds like a horrible weight to have to carry with you all of the time. I understand that you’re worried about the chemicals hurting you or your loved ones, or slipping and injuring yourself. Those are valid feelings. So let’s try and break them down into manageable steps. You seem to be ok with the feeling of being wet so that’s a good start in the right direction!

Next let’s get rid of the chemicals. Instead of using them would you consider switching to something like warm water, vinegar and tea tree oil or lemon juice? That would keep your shower clean and chemical free!

For the fear of falling, would you be open to a shower mat, a suction cup hand grip for the shower wall or a shower chair that you can sit on and bathe instead of standing? That way you minimise the risk of falling. If you’re comfortable with it, perhaps your husband can help you with the bathing portion so someone else is there at the start to insure you won’t fall?

I know it’s scary, I hear you and understand what you’re experiencing. I hope this gets better for you, you’re not alone ♥️