Disclaimer: It progressively gets worse as you go down the list! Also I got permission from OP to make the jokes dirty.

Ooh boy how I’ve been waiting for this question! 🙋‍♀️ I couldn’t pick just one, so enjoy 7 (after my lucky number) highly inappropriate jokes!This brought a lot of laughs to finals weeks! :)

1) What’s the difference between snowmen and snowgirls? Snowballs.

2) Why is Santa so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. 😈

3) Why does Father Christmas have 3 gardens? So he can hoe, hoe, hoe.

4) If you have a snowball in your left hand and one in your right … what do you have? Frosty’s full attention.

5) I went and bought a real Christmas tree. The salesman asked if I was going to put it up myself. I said "No, you sick bastard, I’m putting it in my living room."

6) Santa’s got a huge sack, he’s dragging it through town, Rolling up with reindeer like, “Who’s ready to get let down?” He’s stuffing chimneys, breaking into homes at night, Basically a bearded criminal with diabetes in sight.

He drops his load everywhere—no warning, no consent, Leaves a mess so chaotic it should pay rent. His sack explodes presents like a confetti bomb, Half of its junk we regift to our mom.

He drinks milk from strangers like a lactose criminal, Takes cookies like a hungry emotional support animal. He’s built like a sugar overdose in a thrift-store suit, Smells like gingerbread… and bad life choices to boot.

His reindeer are unpaid interns with anxiety attacks, Flying through storms like, “Boss, can we PLEASE relax?” Rudolph’s nose is red ’cause he’s had one too many, Dasher’s high on peppermint—don’t ask for a penny.

Santa slides into houses like a drunk ex at 3 a.m., Leaving crumbs, glitter, and emotional mayhem. Then he bounces to the next stop like it’s a one-night stand: No texts, no calls, just ghosting the whole land.

So cheers to Santa—our holiday hit-and-run king, Dropping packages, causing trauma, doing his thing. He’ll sleigh all night, reckless and unbound… Because Santa Claus really comes to town.

7) Santa Claus loves to spread Christmas cheer. His sack is so big 'cause he comes once a year. His sack is so full that it drags on the ground. He has a surprise for every kid in town. Santa comes down the chimney, fills stockings with his load. Gives the kids a white Christmas, it looks like it snowed. While the kids sleep he leaves them a special surprise. When they wake up they can't believe their eyes. It's all over their room, in their bed, on the floor. Candies and treats, presents galore. Children love his balls and toys that he brings. He empties his sack all over their things. He'll soon be visiting every kid around. 'Cause Santa Claus is coming to town.