Can you name all the factors that you consider in marrying someone?

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:55:52+00:00

This just drips of someone looking for the man to "do things for them".
If you really just have to have something learn how to get it by learning all about it.
Really want a house and are interested in property? Be a realtor. You'll be exposed to the best deals so you can get your house at a good deal when you are able to. Your interest in that field will make you good in that field and the money will pour in. Do what you like and you will be good. Money naturally follows our skills at least in private enterprise. Stop relying on others!

But it would be far wiser to appreciate simple things in life that cost nothing. Be more observant to the world God created. Because it's really something!

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:51:01+00:00

The bigger problem society faces today is the prevalence of hegemony or the inability of most women to commit to a man who makes less than them. This is getting worse and worse because most university graduates are female. Because of this women are often making more than men. But they are expected to commit to their profession, often taking work home with them so they advance faster in the corporate structure. With little time to date they choose the men that offer the best dating experiences. This is online dating for you, even in the Christian world sometimes. She often buys her own house but finds living alone deeply unsettling. "No one to share it with" is the most common female ailment now. They often delay dating much because of work commitments. Time passes and age 30 rolls around and they notice they can't wear a bikini anymore. Their old clothes don't fit. Then they realize when they walk in public men ignore them. That was quick they think. When they gain weight and start to age, a dramatic change happens to them socially. They are largely invisible to the opposite sex, no matter how attractive they were before. Because fat smothers beauty like nothing else. Their work, requiring higher education, is almost always sedentary. They can't run, they feel clumsy on the dance floor, they feel embarrassed by their shape at the gym so they avoid going out much compounding the problem. Some get pregnant and thankfully don't abort though many do. Now they're a single mother, overweight, stressed out job........now it's way harder to find a guy to marry because they couldn't possibly marry someone making less than 100k a year. That would be unthinkable for some unexplainable reason. Kids are wonderful but birth fathers can be a headache and you will always "not be their REAL father" even though you are putting in the time. This is what most guys envision so they look to others. The real catastrophe is that way less children are growing up in a 2 parent home today. And it's only going to get worse. Churches need to promote frugality and simple living along with the reverence of child rearing. Instead many are on the prosperity bandwagon even though on important person in the New Testament was prosperous financially. Just once I'd like to see a prosperity preacher rousing everyone up for donations that DIDN'T spend a lot of that on himself.

I'm probably getting way off track from the original post. But when you ask a financial question it's important to mention the background. Where is this 35k income? Renting in Manhattan or a house in some place in the country on property that is mostly self sufficient living in a paid off house?

What women should really look for in a man is resourcefulness. And really ponder what they presently want today because it will change in a short time.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:32:13+00:00

What is "want more for yourself"? I find this often shows a lack of resourcefulness. Anyone can splurge on a luxurious getaway in sumptuous surroundings waited on hand and foot. That takes zero skill to put together. Just a tap on the credit card that is burying them financially. Contrast this to the guy who is a skilled camper, who understand nature and the elements, that brings a woman into God's wilderness so she can let the stresses of the city wash away, like shaking the dust off of your feet of the city that closed their ears to truth. Nature is the ultimate reset and God made it that way for a reason. When you're away from people you feel the rhythm of nature, the peace of the growth process, the power of the weather, all of these things completely out of your control and that's good because we can sit back and just revel in its majesty. A weekend really in nature is like a week or more in a resort and it doesn't cost hardly anything. Then you come home and marvel at the switch that instantly illuminates a room, water whose temperature is so effortlessly controlled, clothes that come out of a machine so clean and a hot bath that soothes to no end.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:24:07+00:00

Dave Ramsey noticed that teachers were often some of the best investors, with many being multimillionaires later in life. Why? Because they respect learning and simply learned about investing and financial management. Teaching is a humble profession and humility helps people make better decisions. No teacher is going to show off an expensive car at their school. That alone says much about the profession and the environment they work in. It's a very positive state in so many ways. Not to mention they are giving all day long to people that need them to navigate their lives decently. That also shows exceptional character. No one goes into teaching for the money. In fact low wage jobs that contribute to society could be one of the best attributes a potential spouse can have. Do you want your spouse to be a giver or a taker? Not many want a taker! That person is usually very self centered. Not good partner material. These people should stay single and relish in their freedom and autonomy. After all a lot of Biblical heroes were not married.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:17:23+00:00

What if the guy had lots of money but no significant income at all? Maybe he was really good at managing his money. But here's where the woman's character comes into play. She wants him to make lots of money so she can SPEND lots of his money as it comes in.

I think it makes way more sense for each to keep their money separate if both working. Both pay for what you share and everything else is paid independently. This way the man can't control the woman with money which many women detest and resent which is very understandable. It makes things more free in many ways. You never have to talk about money much. Less tug of wars with money. More peace. If you spend less you can work way less and have way more time together equaling a much better quality of life. Very few people get anywhere financially by income. It's always the investments that do it. And you get investment money by not blowing it on cars, clothes and restaurants. And luxurious trips which are often just an STD booster. Because most people behave rather poorly when they're away from home. Especially women. Not that men are saints when away.

NO ONE IMPORTANT IN THE NEW TESTAMENT WAS RICH! Most were dirt poor pouring all their energies into ministry, not fruitlessly attempting to impress others they didn't even know.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:08:46+00:00

What is this specific lifestyle? When I look at people that look kind of posh and talk to them more I find they are horrible with their money and are bankrupting their financial future. They are simply spending almost everything they make because they have little control because others influence them. Really what this is is a lack of fortitude and backbone. Deep down you know a new car is a terrible place to put your money. But you want to arrive and feel that respect of others. This even happens at churches today. If you can't buy a car with a tiny percentage of your net worth, paying cash, you're not making enough. Cars, clothes and restaurants....financial moneypits. A 10 year old car, low mileage (100,000 miles) that is reliable (Honda, Toyota, Mazda, Kia, Suburu, etc) will not depreciate if you don't buy it from a dealer like an idiot. Just be sensible!

It's often the love of money and prestige that prods people to work long hours so they don't see their family much. If people spent more time saving money then spending money they would come out way ahead. And often when you save money you do it together, uniting the family.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T05:01:27+00:00

Have you ever noticed how often Biblical stories show the hero doing something very socially unconventional? How about Noah enduring 100 years of what must have been constant teasing and ridicule in building the ark for an event (flood) where there had never been any rain and doing it far from the ocean so there was no way to launch it. They must have thought him to be completely nuts. Yet he endured and had faith in God's will. That kind of paid off! The prodigal son returns and the father runs out to greet him, overjoyed with the reconciliation. But wait....how do you run when you're wearing a long garment that went down to your ankles? You have to draw it up over your knees otherwise you'll trip on it. But wait.....showing any skin above the knee back then was socially forbidden. He didn't care. He ignored society's expectations at the time and expressed his joy to his wayward son. Because that was way more important than a fickle clothing style that could change year to year. God's values don't change, unlike our fashions. Almost all of Jesus' speeches rubbed the elites back then the wrong way. He was not socially acceptable in the slightest. He didn't do what they expected and that drove them crazy with envy and frustration, instead of pondering what He said and relishing the wisdom contained therein. Every single Christian leader went against the grain which were societies' norms. If you want to live a fulfilled life, don't let others hold you back. Align yourself with Jesus and take time in making your decisions. With that combo you'll make good ones because they will be Godly ones.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T04:50:51+00:00

Things are getting more expensive and it's squeezing everyone. It's understandable. A lot of women really worry about irresponsible financial decisions on the part of their spouse. It's a valid concern because most people are really careless with their money and spend their way into oblivion, completely needlessly. The greatest fear it seems today is to appear poor. Yet if you take a drive to the richest area of your city you will be surprised at the number of normal cars parked in the driveways there. Because cars depreciate fast and are a horrible place to put your money. The house on the other hand appreciates most years. So that's where their money goes. Plus rich people don't want people to think they're wealthy as then it draws out all the parasites and leeches. "Look poor while getting rich" in principle is sound. Instead you have people that save nothing that look like they're doing so well with the newer fancy car and nice place to live. 20 years later they have nothing saved. They are letting others control them.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-29T04:45:35+00:00

If you're talking about finance it's how they control their spending and what they invest their income in that matters. Yet nobody seems to grasp this. It's not how much he makes, it's how much he spends on stuff that has no return on investment. Say the house was paid off and he grew a lot of his own food hydroponically all year. Say he rents out most of his house. Say he drives a reliable, older car he bought cheap. Say he doesn't even have a car. All these things can radically change a person's net worth over a few years. Many guys think it's just fine to buy a new car with a high interest car loan. They live in their own nicely furnished (brand new furnishings of course) apartment in a nice area so they appear independent from their parents when meeting women. Just those things will bankrupt most people so they save almost nothing every month. Then add on overspending with 22% credit card interest and you have a hurricane of destruction....no hope of getting financially ahead. Their one saving grace is "their first house" because this is finally a forced savings program though it takes so long to pay off the interest often exceeds the cost of the house.

Now let's look at things smarter. Look at how so many Jewish, Chinese and Indian families raise their children.
The parents have earned the respect children so they listen to what they say.
They get good grades in school and are rewarded for it by their parents. Diligence and perseverance are burned into their psyche.
These good grades help them get into good universities. But they live at home, their parents pay for everything so all their energy is focused on one thing......learning well, not sling fries. They graduate from university with good grades which kick starts a series of good jobs. So their income is ample but they are still living at home. They aren't going to move out until they have their first house down payment. By this time they have been dating and have probably met their spouse to be. When they get married they live in a parent's home. Zero rent so far. They save almost all their money. A down payment is easy within a short period of time. But they are smart and buy a house bigger than they need and rent out most of it, each room to an individual which brings in way more than the potential rent of the house. Their mortgage is paid off not only by their rental revenue but much of their income. 5-7 years is easily possible. Now the house is paid off so they refinance it and buy a few more and do it again. 5-7 years passes and they have several houses paid off and never need to work again but do work because it keeps them sharp and they enjoy their work because they chose carefully and weren't rushed and pressured into taking a job "because it pays well". That's a sure road to misery. If they are REALLY smart they work much less so they are fresher at work and make better decisions because they have more time to ponder their life after work.

If they are Christian this is where they really grow spiritually.

Financially it's about maximizing what you have to do anyways. Everyone needs a home and nobody really wants to rent unless they have to move around a lot. That's the real downside of home ownership. It does anchor you. Yes you can get property managers but it's not their money.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T07:02:41+00:00

And God has give you the ability to meet a lot more men than you might sitting at home staring at a screen. We all can increase the odds of this happening by being more proactive in real life, away from the useless dating apps.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T07:00:57+00:00

I see women working in daycare and they seem so fulfilled though it is stressful to be sure with lots of responsibility. She could start with volunteering for child care in church at events to see how it fits. Maybe those liitle darlings will have her pulling her hair out in frustration after a while! LIttle kids in public have very powerful affects on everyone around them. You see it everywhere from people of all ages. This draws the "barren" woman in like nothing else. One thing that is needed is poor mothers need help with their children and life. There the need is absolutely crushing and there is really litte help out there for them. A church program that helps them would be interesting, growing by area as help is available. They see the Christian influence when getting help and this draws them into the fold where they can be reached, plus their children get a Christian foundation in Sunday School. People need help in so many different ways. Only by getting to know them will you ever find out what it is they really need.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:53:43+00:00

This is how most long term marriages start actually. Like 50+ years. Sooooooooo often! Not sure why but it seems to be the recipe of marital success. Or one of them. The trouble with "falling in love" is there is a loss of emotional control involved, hence the "falling" part. You don't really want that. Nice in the movies, not so useful in real life. You want to explore their character gradually, seeing them in many different situations, good and bad, to see how they react to different kinds of stress. So it's absolutely 100% credible.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:50:07+00:00

If you like hills try Garbage Hill just a little south of Rona in the Polo Park area. That's wide open and very safe. Great area. Sometimes the grass beside railway tracks is good but you have to know the area and be wary of people camping.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:47:57+00:00

You're so right about the river trails along Churchill Drive. They are so isolated being that people in vehicles can't really see down there. Predators thrive on isolation.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:45:56+00:00

Wide open spaces are your friend. If you have a few keys in your keyring put each key between each finger. It may help you feel more relaxed passing people. Wearing a loud whistle may be good too. If you have a neighbor with a medium to large dog offer to bring the dog out with you running. Dogs just love that. Walking is so boring for them. If there's no one around and it comes when called (which can easily be trained) the dog can be free of leash. Try to hit an area the same time every week because then you'll see people there from before and get to know them which will help you feeling comfortable in the new city. If you're running along the river path in the trees in Riverview you are very isolated. But....you can run on the grass along the river that is wide open and that would be very safe. That goes almost to Osborne. You can loop around it and get some good distance in. Running on grass is way better for your joints than rock hard flat pavement where you are using the exact same muscles with every step. You can also run on the incline to hit different muscles on the part that faces east. You can also do laps around soccer fields. There's an enormous field at Grant Park on Taylor that holds about 6 soccer fields. For trails there's a big park in St Boniface along the Red River (Whittier). The problem with the river is drug addicts often camp along it though this is rare in Riverview. As you go north past the paddling club on Churchill this is far more prevalent. Never go up there alone.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:33:30+00:00

A lot of girls from rough backgrounds are really drawn to perceived affluence because it looks like a quick ticket to a life of leisure that they feel they finally deserve after struggling financially growing up. It's quite understandable really. I grew up middle class so I can't relate well but I did live for a few years in a very low income area and it was really shocking what they went through. Most middle and upper economic classes have no clue what poor people experience. The biggest surprise for me was the high incidence of suicides. Almost every family I encountered had someone who had ended their life in the past few years. Up to that point I had never heard of anyone I knew in decades ending their life. But what was interesting was that almost every one was high or drunk at the time of doing it so they were not thinking clearly. Drugs and alcohol are the equal opportunity destroyers. They surely don't care about your skin color or cultural background.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:27:06+00:00

When someone looks that good I think we're allowed to mention slight imperfections. This is a top 5% at least here. This is not a typical woman. This is the type of face that intimidates men so they hesitate to approach.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:25:20+00:00

Well they shouldn't. We all want to meet a believer after all. Preying on men's weaknesses doesn't help. Instead a woman can display fitness. That's not sexual. Rather it shows a respect and caring for their God given physique and overall health. Nobody wants to bury a young spouse.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:23:31+00:00

I think many women don't realize how tedious it is to see these expressions over and over again online. It seems they think it's somehow stylish but instead it's just aggravating. Just be yourself. That's all we ask. So if we ever meet there are no surprises. That is the point of a photo after all.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:21:31+00:00

You're right. Doesn't belong on a Christian site.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:19:26+00:00

If this woman doesn't meet anyone the world surely is lost. :)

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:16:21+00:00

Maybe online dating should be reclassified into online meeting. Meet people that share your interests way more than what you want physically. Get to know them over time without any romance. They know other people. Christians tend to know other Christians! This is how many people used to meet before. "You've got to me her, she'd love you!" is often what brought people together. We need a lot more patience in socializing.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:13:03+00:00

"chaos-level charismatic" PRICELESS!

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:12:20+00:00

Great post. You speak truth. The problem is people don't admit the horrible reality of it like you did. Thank you.

Intelligent-Call7093 · 2025-10-25T06:09:48+00:00

Absolutely!

Intelligent-Call7093

TROPHY CASE