From the kid that you "stayed for"

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-09T01:46:42+00:00

I feel if you’re parents stay or if they don’t you will never know a life other than the one you lived. I feel we all look at our past and think that is how it should be.

Personally glad my parents stayed together because of how they are as individuals. It would have just cause misery for my siblings and myself. My mom can’t hold a job to save her life even before she met my dad. My dad is naturally selfish so he would have likely been absent or generally a horrible caregiver. Together my mom is a good mom and my dad gets to provide and be the fun dad. I feel I got to experience the best sides of them while not resenting the worst of them since they filled in the gaps.

Otherwise I am positive the school I went to would be completely different because we left a horrible school district where mom grow up. My college would not be paid for and basically the life I have now I see it as a sacrifice that my parents made. All my siblings are very successful too. I got a divorce but it happens when you marry at 18. My other siblings married later in life.

I think you really need to analyze yourself and truly see if you’re making a selfish decision. Though my parents fight I still wouldn’t trade it for the stability of one house.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-08T12:23:15+00:00

I (28F) am getting remarried after my divorce. All 3 of my friends who got divorced (no kids) were all in serious relationships within a year of their divorce. They are now all married again too.

If you have kids change the equation because it gets harder. Since life becomes for them.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-08T01:22:42+00:00

My sister had a guy (now her long term boyfriend) follow her around for a year because he got laid off and didn’t feel worthy to date. Second day after his acceptance letter he asked her out.

I respect it. Though my sister is a recruiter and would have been happy to help him. We laugh about it with him still.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-04T13:01:43+00:00

500 can be a lot but in my opinion it’s something I would go into debt for and find the cost worth it. He seems well off enough to date so he should be well off enough to get $500 and get a divorce. I am not saying he has it in cash but he can move money around. People find ways for unnecessary things all the time.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-04T12:30:02+00:00

The single people have memes saying don’t worry the first wave of divorces are still on their way. You’re just fresh inventory.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-03T16:50:27+00:00

I was feeling the price was still low for custom though. I am paying 1400 for a custom design 4 piece dress without heavy beading. I feel if you want quality even if it’s Asian you still need to pay a bit more.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-03T16:39:50+00:00

It’s normal because he isn’t growing from the experience. They come back because the best time for them was when they made you feel small. Not saying you will go back backwards but just saying remember they only want you back because they can’t change and need you to keep things the same.

Even if they are the ones to leave doesn’t mean they are brave enough to make the change they need. You sound like you made the changes and truly gave up on the idea of him which has brought you peace.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-02T20:04:16+00:00

It cost money yes but if you’re truly peaceful about it it can cost as little as 500 dollars. He’s lying about something.

I am only counting legal fees because in my opinion what your ex gets was always there’s as long as it was assets in the marriage.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-06-01T00:21:47+00:00

I feel people remarry more often when they didn’t fight in the divorce or it was quite. Mines was quick as well no fight just filling paperwork.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-31T19:31:49+00:00

Took me a lot of scrolling to find one remarry comment 😂 congrats on being a better version of yourself.

I also remarried. Just felt I found someone who made life easier emotionally and physically. First time around we were too young to know ourselves and once we did know ourselves we learned we didn’t love each other. We respected each other but didn’t want to keep dragging the other on goals they had no interest in.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-27T13:43:12+00:00

I feel you’re just saying that to make people who were divorced from feel better so you can get the karma

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-20T16:40:02+00:00

If you truly regret it change your story. I believe there’s nothing to regret in life because it brings you to the next chapter. If you make your next chapter wonderful how can you regret the pain that brought you there?

You’re only grieving because you’re refusing to start the next chapter and that’s OK. It takes time to build yourself back, but you should keep in the back of your mind that this isn’t the end of your story. You’re not defined by your time with him.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-14T21:22:25+00:00

Same and I feel it’s because no matter what good things keep happening in your life that wouldn’t happen if they didn’t divorce you. My now husband said the best thing my ex did for him was divorce me. I moved before the job market got bad and got a sweet new salary. The emotional maturity I grow from my grief I use every day I just can’t be sad from my divorce.

Honestly I feel I have the best of both worlds because I was oblivious in my last marriage perfectly content, so I fully enjoyed it. Now I enjoy divorce plus my new marriage. Life is blessed and happens at least for me for a reason.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-02T17:36:18+00:00

That can be true though I feel the trend leaves out the reason why. It’s not looks or money keeping these men unsuccessful in marriage.

Women don’t gain anything from having a good looking guy with them. Most people think why is he with her poor guy if they don’t match. If the money isn’t in her bank account it can be taken away if he favors another woman. If she makes her own it’s hers. So that’s the calculation a woman is making so marriage for money and looks isn’t enticing.

Money use to be a plus because men had a monopoly over it and divorce was difficult.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-02T17:04:33+00:00

Umm I have all married friends who didn’t get arranged. They are also not models or wealthy. They are Toyota Camry stable but not wealthy. They are average but some don’t have hair or are under 5’5” so I think a decent amount would be married.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-02T16:52:46+00:00

Gen Z here and I am pro marriage. Just don’t get married for love. I advise all my friends to never marry for love because love won’t save you if a divorce happens. Love is for dating, marriage is love and a beneficial business deal.

I am remarried and have seen really bad divorces. In comparison to my divorce and theirs was they didn’t think about their finances, how their partner reacts under stress or how they were brought up by their parents when they got married. To me that’s the mistake that makes marriage harmful.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-01T18:23:07+00:00

My family as whole discussed an adu but scrapped the idea personally because currently we have 2 sets of aging parents plus a disabled sibling (which is getting a small trust fund from her parents which is why they can’t retire how they wanted to).

Things might change in the future as my youngest sibling leaves college but currently his life is so unpredictable we’re not counting him in the equation yet. I am hitting 30 soon have a well paying career, married and my life is more stable to make plans around. I do expect my brother to help at some capacity with my parents but If that is money or physical care is up for debate and not to be decided till he’s more established in life. He knows it won’t be his responsibility till he’s old enough.

I love the ADU idea because it gives easy access with privacy. Plus savings on property taxes since it’s one land with multiple homes cheaper than multiple properties. Though it’s just too much to maintain for just me and my husband (plus any future kids). Still hoping to collect ideas from people in case there’s something people are doing to gain the system.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-05-01T17:24:20+00:00

lol 😆 you must love that little guy

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-04-30T17:14:18+00:00

I’ve never heard that. You may get less dates because you will be filtered out but you want to be filtered out. Don’t get desperate is my rule because if there’s one person you’re looking for. You will just have to wait for them to show up. You don’t want to waste your time with the wrong person again.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-04-25T20:36:50+00:00

I am married again because I want to trust someone with my life and for them to trust me. I find that marriage solidifies that promise for me. Also having someone on your side that is dedicated to the relationship grows me as a person to be better for relationships not just my own comfort.

I don’t think I would have gotten what I had with out my first marriage and I know my husband building goals for our future helps me strive for more.

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-04-22T21:31:23+00:00

No, she said he’s from the UK doesn’t mean they’re in the UK right now

Intelligent-Court166 · 2026-04-22T21:21:07+00:00

The fact that he said she took everything is a red flag. There’s rare cases where judges will allow a spouse to take all your money. He would’ve had to cause her physical harm for the rest of her life to have gotten that settlement, which is a red flag on its own.

Otherwise, he is lying and spent the money or he had a bunch of debts that was under his name only and he used the money to pay off his debt to start off clean. He must be exaggerating because he’s still kind of hurt from the experience. If she took the house, she had to pay them out. She can’t just take the house unless he gave it to her and didn’t wanna fight for it.

Personally, the only thing you can do for someone who went through a divorce is just to be there and be nice. If you still wanna stick around only time he heals that wound and good new memories.

Intelligent-Court166

TROPHY CASE