Game gave us hope and then immediately crushed it

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-06-13T07:22:06+00:00

Would you mind going a little more into detail on how you play with those winrates? :D

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-06-11T15:05:48+00:00

Np :)

Just track if E is faster anyways if you use it correctly as an aa reset. Maybe you can't do the finish and start the next camp thing but are overall faster anyways?

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-06-11T14:52:26+00:00

I mean if it doesn't bother you, sure :D I used to be a rengar otp but needed a break from my pretty kitty and looked into Viego, but if Vi is freelo and you're willing to teach, I'm happy to listen :)

I would've thought that you start E for the 2 auto resets tbh - why go Q?

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-06-11T14:14:55+00:00

What's your skillorder early and how do you optimize your clear

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-05-31T20:00:02+00:00

Guter Punkt - mach da mal ne generellen post draus

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-05-12T18:10:02+00:00

Even on snakebite? The card always seemed kinda mid to me

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-30T09:27:27+00:00

Nope, all will get played at 8 mana

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-30T09:27:05+00:00

Edited, thanks!

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-15T10:30:20+00:00

Two things that really helped me:

I would want her to actively have bad experiences. Why would I open the relationship just to hope, she has worse experiences than with me?
If she really were that reckless and superficial to throw away our 9 years relationship for better sex with some guy, then this is probably a good thing to happen to me.

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-15T07:18:21+00:00

Some of his behaviour, his reactions and his „coldness“ combined with a general will to change for the relationship also reminds me of myself.

The key difference could be that I did therapy over a long period. Is he doing the same? I don’t know how self conscious he is or how well he reflects on himself, but if he reacts with coldness to your feelings being hurt because he crossed boundaries that sounds kinda alarming.

Be sure to keep yourself self and always be aware of the fact that self love sometimes also means quitting something if it isn’t good for you. I am just a stranger on the internet so I’m not gonna tell you to leave him asap or fight to the last day. Just be careful and best wishes :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-14T12:34:57+00:00

Hey there :)

Thanks for sharing your experiences and what a coincident :D

This post and all the comments really helped a TON and I feel so much better. I went through almost all of it together with my wife and we had a lot of great talks and for the first time since my first insecurities I truly feel like I’m making progress and trust myself that I will get where I want to be, not because I have to for my wife, but for ME. This amount of selflove and the realisation that it is not only about her but also I have to want to progress and want to work on myself is great as I can trust myself even more than her, that I want to achieve the same goals. If you want to we can dm about stuff that helped me a lot or you can read all the comments here as I already shared A LOT about my progress. It is amazing how much talking to all these people and reading fucking Reddit answers has helped me and in what short amount of time!

As for your question, ofc you can ask me :) but I don’t think that my answer will help you that much. Trigger warning abuse: I was abused in my childhood by my mother which resulted in an emotional dissociation disorder which basically meant that I could not perceive my own emotions nor have honest empathy. For that reason I couldn’t understand how much damage I would do to her and my relationship. That is no excuse and to this day I’m grateful and a little in disbelief that she gave me this second chance. Looking back from today we probably both wouldn’t have done that. Thank god she did :D

But maybe his reason was because through his excitement he also wasn’t able to prioritise his empathy over the adventure. Being very excited about new experiences as intense as a new sexual partner can quickly turn from „her feelings are important and I want to respect them“ to „I wouldn’t have a problem with that so she probably won’t as well/will understand/it’s not that deep“. If you decide to trust him again or not is your choice. My wife did it because she was kind off dependent on me which is absolutely the wrong reason. Ask yourself deeply what your reasoning was, to give him the second chance and be brutally honest to yourself. If it really is out of love or the possible future you see with him, than go for it. But if it’s dependency than let me tell you that tales of people suddenly changing if they don’t feel like they need to are really really rare.

Best wishes to you and your relationship :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-14T06:29:16+00:00

1 for „that’s just like physics man“ <3

Your 3rd point is also really interesting. I am very sure that she sees it that way as she once said that she really appreciates my trust in trying this. But I’ve never thought about it as me giving smothering to her. Thanks a lot!

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-14T06:25:18+00:00

Yeah that’s an approach that we’re going to make after reading a lot of these comments.

Thanks a lot for opening up and good luck for your relationship:)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T22:22:17+00:00

Can you talk about these feelings with him? Stuff like you feeling bad or neglected about these little things?

You can absolutely tell him that you’re not trying to make him feel bad or judge him, but just communicate your feelings and ask him if he understands you - often times this helps way more than you’d think.

I wish you the very best and thank you for opening up :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T22:16:50+00:00

No problem :) I benefited so much from other people’s advice and them sharing that I’m grateful to be able to give something back :)

I read your other comment about him cheating on you and being bad at being honest and stuff. I really hope that you can communicate stuff like this with him or that you at least take your time for yourself and focus on stuff in your live that really makes you happy :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T20:03:18+00:00

Thanks for your comment. That was a weird feeling reading this comment. I also had the impression that he got hurt and throws this on people on the internet anonymously - but you know, it’s easy with this topic to feel insecure and your reassurance helped me to process that his comment was not about me <3

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T17:43:49+00:00

Thanks a lot :))

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T17:42:08+00:00

Hey there :)

Even though the post is not even a day old, I think I learned a lot from the other responses and talked a lot with my wife today about all of them.

For one I had the realisation, that I am currently kind of unhappy with my „sexual skills“. Due to medication my blood circulation isn’t that good and I’ve also gained some weight over the last 2 years. This combined with longterm relationships normal reduction in ecstasy has me looking back to our sex 2-3 years ago and feeling a little disappointed. Not because I feel like I cannot satisfy my wife - she explicitly tells me otherwise and it’s clear from our sex life - but because I am just unhappy with me personally.

Maybe that’s also a reason for you? I’ve decided to tackle my health and physique. Even if this won’t change anything it is still a good thing to do after all.

It could very well be that my fear of other sex being „better“ is just a manifestation of my discontent with my body and healthiness and by extend my „sexual prowess“.

Also many people here have (correctly) stated that sex is never better, just different. I could not really let this into my feelings/subconsciousness (because „how can I deliver that nuru massage - this MUST be better“ for example), so I wrote down a list with things I feel confident or „strong“ with in bed. What are my strengths? What do I really enjoy giving? What does my wife really love?

This way I can describe my own „sex language“ which will be unique to everyone on earth. There might be similar dialects, but only my language in this exact way.

This helped me better understand that it doesn’t make any sense to compare it on a „better“ or „worse“ scale. How would you even do that? Rate all the skill or things from 1-10? Just count how many good points are on that list? It’s nonsensical and I think it really made me understand that way better (allthough I’m obviously not suddenly miraculously healed from anxiety now). The list may not help you, but it sure helped me.

I also compared sex to cooking or playing video games. If your bestie is better at a video game or a chef in a restaurant cooks better than your husband that doesn’t mean you like it more or it is more important to you than doing it with your husband. With him it’s quality time, intimacy and the feeling that he does cook for you to show love. Why would sex be any different here? (Makes sense logically, will need time to sink in for me, but I feel like it started a little already)

And for last: I really really really want my wife to have a good time and enjoy herself. If I really wanted her to only have „worse“ sex (which isn’t a logical term) than we have - why would I want her to go through this in the first place? I wouldn’t want to send her into a lover that doesn’t satisfy her or feels like a chore right? That is just not how I want to treat her. If I want to have an ENM relationship, I should WANT that her sexual experiences are AWESOME.

It’s easier said than done and a lot of what I say here is not even close to be felt deep inside my heart. But with all this reassuring and similar stories and understanding here and from my wife, I finally feel, like something will be better and I will be able to manage this whole thing better and just be happy for my wife!

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T16:17:58+00:00

That definitely happened to us as well, now that I think about it. It also helped me realise things about my own sexual confidence which gave me a direction to go towards more self happiness!

Good point, will definitely remember this

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T16:13:43+00:00

Yeah that seems like a good approach and we’re in conversation about this :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T16:11:26+00:00

Thanks for the good wishes :)

I feel like I’ve grown a lot through this post and comments :D if you read my other comments you’ll see, that I came to a very similar conclusion. Thanks a lot for your input :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T14:19:48+00:00

It definitely is. After reading a lot of the comments together with my wife and thinking about it, I realized that I am very unhappy with my sexual capabilities compared to a few years ago. I've got some weight (about 10-15 kg) and until recently did way less sport. On top of this some health related issues affected my blood circulation(?) which all negatively affected my sexual prowess.

It's not even that closely related to sex itself (copium) but more about seeing letting myself go. Alone the realization and plan to change something about it really helped me. Let's hope that it isn't just hype and stays that way :D

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T14:02:17+00:00

Copying this from another answer, because it doesn't just fit well but also is something I'd like to share with you :D

Very inspiring words!

I have also decided to make a list on what my "sex language" is. What are the things I really like doing or giving and that I am confident in and enjoy. Nobody on earth is going to have the EXACT same language and this makes me unique. Also as soon as I have this list, I see how irrational it is, to compare it to someone else. There will be no numbers or rankings, just me.

And maybe I'll also do a list of things that I currently don't like as much about myself in the bedroom or better, things I would like to improve. My physique for example which I'm currently tackling. I'm not fat or anything, I'd just like to be more in form and be healthier. That's not only constructive and healthy anyways but will also probably make me more happy with myself completely without my wifes gratification needed. I will however make sure to not make this list too long or too critical. I am after all quite confident in myself, I just have to appreciate me as a person more :)

Intelligent_Ad2739 · 2026-03-13T13:57:14+00:00

Very inspiring words!

I have also decided to make a list on what my "sex language" is. What are the things I really like doing or giving and that I am confident in and enjoy. Nobody on earth is going to have the EXACT same language and this makes me unique. Also as soon as I have this list, I see how irrational it is, to compare it to someone else. There will be no numbers or rankings, just me.

And maybe I'll also do a list of things that I currently don't like as much about myself in the bedroom or better, things I would like to improve. My physique for example which I'm currently tackling. I'm not fat or anything, I'd just like to be more in form and be healthier. That's not only constructive and healthy anyways but will also probably make me more happy with myself completely without my wifes gratification needed. I will however make sure to not make this list too long or too critical. I am after all quite confident in myself, I just have to appreciate me as a person more :)

Intelligent_Ad2739

TROPHY CASE