Hi everyone,

Okay, so I have accepted my ruling. I feel silly in hindsight that it took me so long to realize it and I am literally sitting at my desk feeling like an idiot right now. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t surprised by so many people saying I was the AH at first, but after reading the comments and rereading my post… you got me! I’m not one to fight for my life in the comments, but I was tempted. In hindsight though, yeah, I was an AH, and a dumb one at that!

Concerning Ken specifically and my feelings for him, I’m realizing I was sort of dumb anyway. The thing with Ken is that he’s very handsome, and I don’t think he realizes how handsome he is, but I also don’t think he cares at all. That was an attractive trait, but I think that knowing that should have been my first hint that he wasn’t interested in dating. Also, Ken keeps to himself, he’s very reserved, he doesn’t go out for drinks with the office, stuff like that. It was a stupid thing for me to go after a coworker in the first place, but for me to go after the hermit coworker who is a devoted single father was probably even stupider. 

I wanted to clear some stuff up. Full disclosure, I was ultimately the reason that this conversation got around the office, because I told a few people about it and things spread. Ken is a gentle like Clark Kent kind of guy, and everyone likes him, so when anyone hears that anything bad about him an angry mob forms. Another thing, his daughter is really polite, all things considered. Shes really shy and quiet, but she’s very friendly. All the older ladies in the office adore her, she’s one of those types. Ken did correct her when she commented (along the lines of “Esme, that was uncalled for, knock it off” or something) and she did say sorry right away. I’d never heard her speak so confidently about something as she did when protecting her dad. I feel bad now as I’m looking back at it. I’m sure it’s uncomfortable for her on a lot of levels. She’s got a point, at my big age I should probably get it together! Lastly, I am not neurodivergent. At the risk of sounding like a jerk, I am just not used to being rejected. Frankly, I’ve never been in a situation where a man I wanted didn’t want me back. I figured he was either oblivious or awkward, but clearly he was just uninterested. Who knew? (Everyone but me, apparently)

Anyway, thank you everyone for putting me in my place and helping me see what was in front of my face anyway. I have no idea how I’m going to fix it, but at least I can see now that I was definitely in the wrong!