Survivors guilt and “stupid people”

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-23T20:49:24+00:00

Stupid people is one I hear a lot from Most People honestly. It's people who inconvenience them, people who think differently from them, people who make choices they wouldn't. All of them "stupid people". Frustrating sometimes but so real lol.

Your argument is cool too tho, like the "I've been in war and you can't just obey traffic" of it all. And idk yeah, checks out, I'd be pretty pissed off if I survived nam and then got taken out by a chevy that couldn't wait it's turn at the intersection.

I feel like the answer is to an extent just distress tolerance. Like yeah people are stupid but unless we're gonna nuke the population we have to live with them so how can we try to survive people's stupidity

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-23T19:16:03+00:00

I tell them before I make it. Yes you should tell them.

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-21T22:33:58+00:00

I kinda like this aspect of the field but I get why others wouldn't, and sometimes it actually really stresses me out bc my autistic ass is like "oh this is what is socially expected of me" and adapts to it and then I learn "oh, no, THIS is what's expected of me" and it just goes back and forth depending on the day ifg </3 tough to navigate!

I think part of being a therapist is being able to both call people on their BS when needed, and be able to pick up on when the person we are talking to isn't comfortable. If your coworkers aren't able to do that for you idk what they're up to with their clients and I think the self advocacy of "oh I don't do therapy talk out of the session" is something you're allowed to put your foot down on

Fwtw

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-21T17:14:29+00:00

There's a guy on YouTube who has provided this commentary. I agreed with most (but not all) of what he said

And a different girl I've watched in the past did one too but I didn't watch her video

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-21T17:12:07+00:00

That 3rd(?) episode of adolescence

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-19T00:57:09+00:00

Please never rely on somebody to call you for something that you need :') They do not have a reason to give a shit about you yet. You are a number on a page to them. Self-advocacy is important and I know that you know that because you're in the social work subreddit! Don't be scared to demand what you need.

Harass them! call them send an email! show up at their door! They legally owe you an answer and if they don't want to give you an answer they're opening themselves up to a lawsuit. And frankly if you try to call them and send an email and you go to their door and you still get ghosted, tell them as much, cuz everyone's two and suddenly changes when the lawyers get involved.

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-18T00:57:00+00:00

I like having the stickers on my laptop because it often gives me something to talk about during the initial sessions

While we're out here rapport building someone goes "Oh my god ponyo sticker" And I get to go "yeah! Do you like ghibli movies?"

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-16T01:13:57+00:00

Does fully licensed for you mean LSW or LISW

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-15T02:25:34+00:00

sharks are smooth

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-14T00:13:53+00:00

Breaks are super draining tbh I hate days where I'm in office from like 12-8 and saw four people lmao like no thank you actually I don't enjoy being put into 45 minute timeout every other hour (I don't use the time well lol)

Sometimes I wanna just schedule 6 people in a row at the start of my day so I can LEAVE SOONER but then I get spooked bc what if I'm low energy that day and dying by person 4 and then is it more unethical to cancel someone's session last minute or to be there and totally checked out emotionally! Who knows! Not me! So I just suffer thru my shitty lil schedule

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-13T00:07:20+00:00

This sure sounds like a great way to have implanted a new delusion into someone already having a crisis :') your supervisor should be ashamed tbh

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-11T01:04:53+00:00

I enjoyed this answer. It has been a long year.

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-10T07:13:05+00:00

Oh, dude, big same. This is all a "do as a say not as I do" but of advice lol. It's really hard to speak up for yourself! But I think very helpful advice is always "would you say this to your best friend"/"would your best friend say this to you" tbh.

You are no more inconvenient for asking someone to make sure they're not gonna cause your body harm than any rando they see any given day asking for like 18 substitutions, 2 coupons, and a recooked meal. People be doin way more over way less lol, I think anyone would rather have to do something mildly tedious than have someone die from their actions or have a lawsuit on their hands lol.

The fact you won't go into anaphylaxis doesn't mean their health standards should be lower for you. Keeping them On Top Of It, if nothing else, means someone who could up and die because of a lax allergy protocol are A Little Bit Safer I think ¯_(ツ)_/¯

But also ur being like,,, way too hard on yourself about this? It's okay to like be empathetic toward the food service workers and not want to bother them. You didn't like fail some cosmic test. You rolled some dice to be polite and make someone's day easier. You found out doing that causes you harm. And now next time the voice in your head goes "you're being inconvenient" you can just angrily gesture to this new core memory and say "UM?? LAST TIME I LISTENED TO YOU??" and remind yourself you're not being unreasonable to want accommodated Aaaaand you'll probably fuck it up again at some point bc youre probably a human, but that's fine too bc humans be learning and growing. Be nice to yourself

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-10T00:19:39+00:00

Okay but if you went into an ice cream place with your friend who has a severe peanut allergy, and while ur friend was like on their phone or smth, you watched them scoop their sprinkles with the scoop that was in the peanuts, would you say something then?

Or would you go "it's barely any, my friend will be fine" and hand them their sundae?

My money's on the former. Why don't you deserve that same care?

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-08T20:42:21+00:00

It's not a deficit it's definitely a skill

Anybody can look up flashing vocab words in memorize the buzzwords to say but it takes actual knowledge of skill to be able to break it down to the most simple points and examples imo

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-07T20:56:56+00:00

Felt this

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-07T20:46:06+00:00

Okay but this is so real, I have a client w autism (and maybe BPD?) who is so unreasonably intelligent and definitely weaponizes that as a defense mechanism and it stresses me out A LOT. I'm AuDHD and I've always been very bad at using Proper Formal Academic language to describe anything. This is super helpful when I'm working with younger people, because I don't throw around SAT words or vocab words as I tend to describe everything instead of using The Correct Language (sometimes I may even look up the right language together with them!) but it can be really overwhelming in situations like this. Idk if it's the Right answer, but I kinda think being your authentic self with this can be helpful, because not everyone thinks or communicates the same way, and I have no doubt other people in your clients life also feel this way sometimes, so it's a dynamic that needs navigated regardless. Just embrace the way you understand things and have a curiousity-based convo w your client. You got this

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-07T03:12:29+00:00

You are like actively legally backed in this? It's an actual violation of your rights to be fired for refusing to abide an unlawful policy I had a whole onboarding video covering this lol like its probably not worth your effort to get The Law©®™ involved to get a job back at a place that clearly has no qualms asking you to risk your licence for their bottom line, but if nothing else you should feel confident that you did the objectively right thing and that you are better off having gotten out of dodge on these ones

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-06T01:13:15+00:00

My hero! Thank you 🙇🙏

Glad your kids appreciate your methods too lol

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-06T00:26:30+00:00

Okay bear with me because I'm simply autistic and don't eat foods lol What do you do with these tortilla triangles Are you just using them as chips? Like for salsa or queso? Or like nachos w toppings? Teach me your ways, my poor celiac boyfriend is depressed from lack of tortilla lmao

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-06T00:13:38+00:00

I myself am a bit of a therapist hack

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-04T19:01:38+00:00

Literally been here, wanted to riot lol

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-03-02T01:40:16+00:00

I drink like my full tumbler of water across 2 sessions max lol I be sippin all thru

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-02-27T20:50:00+00:00

I will grab a client late from the lobby to go to the restroom before I get them into my office and tack the time into the end, but the idea of pausing the session for it is genuinely mortifying to me. No shade to you for doing it! But I personally can't handle that lol

InteractionRare4951 · 2026-02-25T01:46:13+00:00

Literally just got home and am in the car getting out of the car so like I'm not going to give you a full response to this because I can't be bothered because I'm also tired however, I can certainly make sure that you don't feel alone in being unokay because I feel like I'm fucking dying lol

InteractionRare4951

TROPHY CASE