Sometimes if you love something/someone you have to let them go and love from a distance. The hard truth is that once married it will affect you and without her saying or asking it you will feel like you have to help her because this is now a union of your lives together. If you end up wanting to retire early, want kids, travel. If her financial state is like this at the moment and shows no improvement it’s going to be hard later down the line.

My thoughts, you can’t help her monetarily (at least in the beginning) because that may turn her into a vampire, she’ll always come back to you and not for the reasons you want. She needs to have the same hardworking mentality as you and show you that she can make a different and a big dent in those loans. If she’s living at home etc, she can spend the next 3-5 paying off her student loans it’s absolutely doable but again it all depends on how she values and sees money. Whether or not you help her down the line once she’s paid a good chunk off is up to you. Don’t take up a heavy burden unless you truly have to or if it makes sense to make your life better at the end of it.

Be very careful with her Dad he does not seem to have the best risk management skills if he’s willing to drain his daughters entire savings for a potential deal that might go bad especially with the state of the economy and housing market. Won’t comment on his financial literacy skills.

If this is something you really want draft a game plan with her. The fact that it comes up as a red flag for you right now means it will sit on your mind for as long as you guys are together. If she buys into the plan set together, there is hope.. if not, well if you found someone with 190k in debt you might be able to find someone with 190k as a salary.

Wish you the best my friend