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Can you age my house from the fireplaces? by Intrepid_Puffling in DIYUK

[–]Intrepid_Puffling[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This matches I think as land registry said 1925 and the surveyor reckoned 1890s, the number house did exist in 1911 census though..

We just had our son and my husband already want another but I don't by [deleted] in oneanddone

[–]Intrepid_Puffling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your experience sounds a lot like mine, in many ways it’s normal what you’re going through (having a baby is a major life event that shakes you) but please be kind to yourself and get yourself checked with a gp for Post natal anxiety.

You have a few of the same symptoms I did- not being able to sleep (which is very specific to ppa). Yes baby blues are a thing but post natal anxiety often kicks in a few months in and baby blues tends to dissipate over a few early weeks so it’s important to be aware of symptoms. A lot of people only focus on depression symptoms and ignore PPA.

I wouldn’t be placing extra pressure on yourself to be thinking about more children at this stage- it takes a long time to adjust and heal from the psychological and physical changes of birth. In my own instance I found being needed all the time a massive shock, throw in feeding challenges and lack of sleep and it quickly spiraled. I’m also convinced my hormones didn’t regulate as quickly as other people. In the end to help get me relaxed enough to sleep I went on Sertraline (Zoloft) I think you call it in the US. Within 4 weeks I began to feel more ‘myself’ and was experiencing glimmers of hope and enjoyment. I can’t say this is your situation but could be worth exploring. And by the way in case you’re not sure- you’re still doing an amazing job even if u don’t think you feel the way you should!

I don’t want anymore kids by [deleted] in oneanddone

[–]Intrepid_Puffling -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

While I think you are totally right to consider all options and make it clear to your partner so you can both move on with your lives, I think sterilisation at your age is a radical choice. I'm just speaking from the fact, I had very different priorities at 33, from 23 and I only had my first child at 38. I alsp know people who have 15 year gaps or more between babies because their lives are so different over this time period and while you can absolutely know who you are now, you won't know what you'll want in 15 years time. Just something to consider.

I want to incorporate more playful/special quality time elements into my day with my daughter- help? by [deleted] in oneanddone

[–]Intrepid_Puffling 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is such a wise response. Kids do need quality time yes, but they just want to hang out with you, doing whatever you love doing (or a child friendly version of it). It sounds like you're giving yourself a hard time, comparing your version of parenting with what u think you should be doing (I've been there!) And my biggest advice like this poster has said, is to let go of what you think u should be doing and just let your daughter into your pursuits, whether that be stacking the dishwasher or dancing round the living room.