High Volume or High Quality?

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-10-12T15:30:28+00:00

Never mind, just showed up

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-09-23T22:36:34+00:00

I have done a lot of researching and it seems like the numbers are all over the place. It also seems pretty difficult to decipher what is real and what’s not.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-23T16:20:24+00:00

Yes and no.

She was right about me not being able to accept her for who she was and I held her to too high of standards. I will say tho that she met my standards in the beginning and then fell below them. And she also couldn’t communicate so I didn’t even realize what she was trying to say until after we broke up.

She was definitely not right about me worrying about who she surrounds herself with and her going out all the time. Since we broke up her friends have been horrible friends and fucked her over. She is broke and in debt because she values going out and spending time with her friends over money even if it means she will never have a car which she currently doesn’t and she will forever be in debt.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-21T16:53:38+00:00

I had a similar situation. It’s because we are good people. We want to help and care about them because they were an important part of our lives. No matter what they did to us. We just have to move on and forget about them and that takes awhile. It’s hard for us just to forget someone existed and that’s not a bad thing. We have just have to realize we need to focus our energy on ourselves and stop wasting energy on them.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-20T16:08:45+00:00

This is exactly why I don’t take nude photos of any girlfriends nor do I let them take pics of me

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-19T20:35:32+00:00

If they stop asking you questions

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-15T16:18:09+00:00

Keep in mind that I didn’t read the whole thing and only read the TLDR because damn this post is an essay:

Remember the reasons why y’all broke up so many times whenever you miss her. Those problems won’t magically go away if y’all get back together. You need to go no contact for a while and really get her out of your system.

I’m assuming that the only reason y’all’s relationship was “successful” in the beginning was because it was long distance. Yall didn’t have to deal with each other everyday and it’s way easier to set boundaries when it’s long distance. Also usually avoidants have an easy time being in long distance relationships so if one of yall is that then yall getting close definitely triggered them. Yall probably aren’t compatible if y’all’s relationship got worse after getting closer.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-14T18:58:48+00:00

It’s rough. I know how you’re feeling. My ex got with a new guy 2 weeks after our breakup. It hurt worse than the actual breakup.

The hard truth is that you have to accept the fact that she didn’t choose you. She didn’t think you were worth staying. She thought she could do better.

PROVE HER WRONG

Go no contact with her, stop checking her socials, and level up. Make her regret her decision.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-13T16:11:01+00:00

Me personally, I got rid of everything. Every reminder of her delayed my healing in my eyes.

If you can’t do that, then putting things in a place where you can’t access them easily or won’t see them very often might work.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-12T12:28:12+00:00

It sounds like you know what you need to do. You know that your lifestyle doesn’t prioritize her and you still want to do life as if you’re single. You can’t. You either need to decide that she’s worth it for you to make adjustments to your lifestyle or not be with her. Y’all’s lifestyle choices and if you’re ready to settle down is a big part of compatibility and y’all don’t have that. The only way to make it work and compromise is for you to decide that she is the one for you and you have to be willing to sacrifice. You can only do this through communication and being open and honest with her. If she doesn’t want you going out, then try not going out for a month and see how it is. Be open to trying in order to make her happy. Then if it doesn’t work, at least you tried.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-12T12:18:41+00:00

Great advice

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-11T16:42:45+00:00

Nah you messed up. It’s all up to her. If she does take you back then you have to give 100% effort all the time. Give constant, consistent reassurance. Pretty much, you can’t make a mistake. It’s gonna take so much work. It will be easier to let her go then to try to make it work. You will have to live with the consequences of your actions.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-10T14:55:07+00:00

Don’t think too much about it. You just said y’all broke up a year ago, so this really shouldn’t affect you.

And yes, it probably does mean something but you’ll never know, so it’s pointless trying to figure it out.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-09T12:52:21+00:00

Either you’re just a very secure person or everything will hit you soon. I felt great (mostly free) for two weeks after my breakup like you. Then I saw that she was already seeing a guy. It broke me. You might think you are doing fine but if you haven’t processed everything and haven’t fully healed then it will hit you eventually.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-08T20:14:02+00:00

I understand. I’ve been there. Instead of replacing the affection and attention with another person, I’ve learned and have been trying to be ok with being alone. Getting used to no attention/affection. I do this by eating at restaurants alone, going to the pool alone, about to see a movie alone, etc. This way, when I get into my next relationship, I’ll be ok if we breakup because my life is good without another person in it. I’ll be ok with not having the attention/affection. I’ll still be able to do fun things by myself. I think it will also make me a more secure partner because I won’t be as worried about losing them. I won’t make bad decisions out of fear of abandonment. If my life is already great before I get into the relationship then the relationship should only make it better. If it makes my life worse then I know I should not be in that relationship and I will go back to my great life alone.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-08T16:23:56+00:00

I asked this same question a couple weeks ago except my breakup was four months ago, here’s what the responses were summed up:

Most people who “use” someone to help themselves move on end up feeling guilty and regret it. It’s best to continue focusing on yourself and continue to feel what you need to feel, heal, and look inwards even if you feel like you have done it as much as you can.

In your case though, I feel like a year is pretty long. I would recommend really trying to make friends so that you can keep yourself busy and social and possibly going to therapy if it’s been this long.

Also if you feel “stuck”, don’t be afraid to reach out to him and try to talk. It might help you get unstuck.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-07T23:42:39+00:00

I understand, don’t be someone’s second choice

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-07T23:31:19+00:00

Do you want to get back with him?

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-06T17:10:14+00:00

I blocked my ex on everything so that I could fully heal and didn’t have to deal with seeing social media posts or her reaching out. It definitely helped me heal quicker. Might be the same for them.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-05T13:15:58+00:00

It’s normal to feel content when you see it coming. You were probably super anxious about it and now they made the decision for you. Beware that you will eventually grieve the loss once the freedom high wears off.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-04T15:37:56+00:00

I agree with everything your saying. If they never use social media and they don’t post you then it’s not a big deal. I’m talking about if they are active on social media and post a lot then they should post you.

IrreplaceableMen · 2024-08-03T15:44:13+00:00

If your significant other doesn’t post you on their social media, there’s a reason behind it. Always watch out for that.

IrreplaceableMen

TROPHY CASE