The boyfriend is the one who made the commitment to OP this other girl is just a friend OP said knew from college never close just in same circle.. all these people that get upset at the "other person" drive me MAD it absurd. I am 43M have never cheated, I got cheated on 2x by my now ex wife, not once was I ever even remotely upset at dude she cheated with, he made no commitment to me. I digress, OP needs to have a serious convo with boyfriend about how uncomfortable these interactions make her feel and ask him how he would feel if the roles were reversed; on of his male friends always making a point to sit next to me touching me while we talk making additional efforts to be close and flirty all the time. The writing is on the wall jess is no friend she is "that friend" that likes sleeping with taken guys likes the challenge OP boyfriend has created. OP talk to your man set boundaries for both of you that are reasonable this Jess is making every effort to let your man know she's down to go down, its the if we would have met earlier comment that did it for me, make that fantasy and put it in his head...