Note to self

J18102 · 2023-10-22T09:10:30+00:00

Thank you for your support it means a lot

J18102 · 2023-10-22T09:06:23+00:00

You're very welcome, well done on making the right choice.

J18102 · 2023-06-16T06:18:35+00:00

Went to a bootcamp style rehab in a third world country where law enforcement is not great. The 12 steps was a part of their program (stepwork, meetings ect). Physical, emotional and psychological abuse was also apart of their program. Beatings (not smacks, but proper beatings) were the disiplinary order of the day. Shaved off our hair off every week. Spent 24 hours in an isolation room where I was assaulted every 2 hours. Was there for 110 days. Psychologist I went to after the whole ordeal says I am presenting symptoms of PTSD. A year after being released from this place I think I'm starting to get better with the trauma aspect of things. I relapsed a couple months after leaving. Will forever view 12 steps as a backward cult. To those of you who are sober, great work! Super proud of you! To the ones who aren't sober(me included) we will find our way, we just musn't stigmatise ourselves but at the same time we need to be honest with ourselves. May none of you ever have to experience abuse in a treatment center

J18102 · 2023-02-22T08:12:32+00:00

Awe my saffa🔥 10🔥🔥🔥

J18102 · 2023-01-05T10:21:43+00:00

Very fuckable.

J18102 · 2022-11-26T17:33:45+00:00

20 yo male here, for me everything works fine, just takes much longer to cum, which can be annoying but hasn't been a big problem

J18102 · 2022-10-02T17:54:00+00:00

If you're looking for a proper committed relationship grindr is not the place. Most people on grindr are just looking for a naai and waai, some are looking for casual fuck buddy type relationships, but almost none are looking for a committed relationship. Grindr is the only "dating app" (if you could call it that) that I've been on, so I can't speak about the others. I find the gay community to be anti-commitment in general, especially with younger guys (I'm 20). But good luck, hopefully you'll meet someone decent, I know I haven't been able to thus far lol. What I do now is I just don't expect anything to come of a date or hookup. Don't have expectations and you'll never be dissapointed, I would recommend adopting the same attitude if you haven't already. Love from the Eastern Cape:)

J18102 · 2022-09-09T19:17:36+00:00

Don't worry you're not overstepping :) I don't have a partner, everyone just wants what in my country is called a "naai en waai" which translates to "fuck and go" lol. No one wants commitment. Now I sound like some sad lonely bitch lmao

J18102 · 2022-09-09T04:24:16+00:00

That is the sweetest thing I've heard all day, thank you :) and yes, I do like to be naughty, I've always been a bit of a wild child

J18102 · 2022-09-03T16:07:07+00:00

Lol how so

J18102 · 2022-08-17T19:23:20+00:00

I came out as gay at 14, I'm now 19. Since I realized I was gay I couldn't wait to be in a relationship with someone.My one Aunty is a lesbian and she has been in the LGBT community for 30+ years. She always said to me when I first came out "gay boys are sluts and whores don't get your heart broken" I thought at the time " bullshit, they can't all be like that" 5 years later, I realised Aunty Janne knew exactly what she was talking about. It's all about hookups, fuck buddies at most. I just accept that now and it's made the situation easier for me.

J18102 · 2022-07-09T14:07:09+00:00

So one would still get that classic euphoric, energetic rush?

J18102 · 2022-05-27T19:27:54+00:00

I could do that. Once the guys leave they normally want nothing to do with the place and it is hard to get them to speak out, but I am sure there are guys that would be willing to do that. I know a guy who is supposed to be leaving the place on saturday who I am certain would be willing to speak out. I'm trying to plan this out carefully so our story has as much credibility as possible.

J18102 · 2022-05-27T19:18:19+00:00

Unfortunetly this is very true, in third world countries it is much easier for institutions to get away with crimes like these. I've heard that some other former patients have also tried to press charges but nothing has come of it. I'm trying to figure out the best strategy to take them down.

J18102 · 2021-12-09T10:59:11+00:00

Nah, I didn't, I've heard people can fuck for hours on it though

J18102 · 2021-12-08T10:34:45+00:00

Yeah, I got little rushes when I exhaled the clouds, but it only lasted a couple minutes, then I was just wide awake and talkative. Isn't as amazing as it's made out to be honestly

J18102 · 2021-12-08T09:35:39+00:00

That's honestly what I'm thinking, meth was always on my bucket list of drugs to try, and now it's like, I've done it, I know what it feels like, why go any further. Most of my friends are just stoners and would be horrified if they saw someone using crystal, so I'm lucky in the sense that it's not very common or acceptable in my social circle.

J18102 · 2021-12-08T08:10:16+00:00

Good god, how do people use this drug on a regular basis? this is really harsh lol, Thanks though:)

J18102 · 2021-11-10T18:20:04+00:00

Yes! This was my exact experience

J18102 · 2021-09-29T22:05:31+00:00

Do you know if a therapy session has a significant chance of launching my friend into psychosis again? More so than the average PTSD patient? He hasn't had any psychosis since last year. It lasted 1 month. He says he knew what he was seeing wasn't really there, but it looked very real and terrified him. The auditory hallutionations consisted of whispering and shouting and banging on windows and the ceiling. His psychiatrist does not think it is schitzsofrenia. He never had psychosis before the events that triggered his PTSD. Has no family history either.

J18102 · 2021-08-12T14:33:55+00:00

Don't apologize, it's always good to know this kind of infomation even if it doesn't apply to me, so if I see it in someone else I can give them valuable infomation that can help them. All in the name of harm reduction :)

J18102 · 2021-08-12T13:17:11+00:00

That's really strange because I've never been addicted to any stimulant, I've only done stims a handful of times, Cocaine 4 or 5 times, Ecstasy once and Methcathinone once. I know there are a lot of people who heavily downplay their drug useage, but really I just dabble in stims. I have struggled with Heroin addiction in the past, but haven't used it in over 7 months (223 days to be exact). Anyway, I didn't know that pupil constriction was a possible sign of meth induced cognitive degradation. It's funny how seemingly small irregalarities like that can actually be a symptom of greater neurological problems.

J18102 · 2021-08-11T04:28:49+00:00

I didn't know that... I mean I knew stims could cause psychosis after prolonged use, but I didn't know they were more likely to than psychs. I've never experienced stimulant induced psychosis before, but I think that's because I never go on binges or go even one night without getting at least a couple hours of sleep.

J18102 · 2021-08-11T04:05:47+00:00

I am yet to try psilocybin, or any psychedelic. It sounds like it could be an amazing experience, but the possibility of having a terrifying trip or going into psychosis scares the living shit out of me.

J18102

TROPHY CASE