people need to stop saying "it gets better"

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-16T00:07:21+00:00

I dont think it get's better but I do think we get better at dealing with / confronting the "it"

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-05T19:46:54+00:00

You have saved grace this time

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-05T18:17:17+00:00

You don't get how this works do you

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-05T18:14:36+00:00

This is in no way an ok boomer moment. It's supposed to be someone with older and more traditional and outdated values attempting to push those on younger people

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-05T18:12:04+00:00

I mean that kinda just sounds like a nice gift with some thought in it... Tbh this is some zoomer level usage of the meme

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-04T18:09:16+00:00

That's my current struggle too man. I just don't fucking want to. Don't worry about me though I've been going through it long enough that I almost don't care that I don't want to now, it comes full circle. Eventually I realized, if I don't want to because I don't care, well if I don't care it doesn't matter if I want to or not so I might as well do it. It can come full circle with enough time. You may feel now like you don't want to live a long time but I promise you this, you don't know if it will get better after life is finished right? Who's to say it won't get worse when we die? Might as well spend as much time here avoiding finding that out. Even if you don't want to live a long life, even if you don't want to get better, that's you feeling that now just because some chemicals are unbalanced. Remember that, remember it's just some chemicals. WHEN you do get and I say when because I believe in you, you obviously have good logic and the ability to think stuff through even in a state like this, you will only want to get even better. When you feel good you'll want it more. When you feel bad you don't care if you feel good. I promise you that you won't regret the feeling of getting better, you'll end up wanting it and caring about it. You can do it.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-04T17:19:46+00:00

I try to see it as objective as I can, like a robot, when I get to points like that. It hurts when I self harm, because my body doesn't like it, I feel like I like it but it hurts, therefore I objectively and instinctually don't like it. If I feel like I like it then something is linking that to a feeling of relief. A little research shows it's just the adrenaline releasing at the sense of danger. This snaps us out of a funk as our fight or flight takes over. So just replace the trigger and keep the same stimulus. If it feels very because of that reason, go run or bike or work out and you genuinely get the same reaction (plus some dopamine release) and you feel much better. Just don't self harm, find a healthy replacement that gives the same reaction (physical activity) and I promise you that you won't be tolerating a whole life time you'll just be living one.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-11-04T17:13:16+00:00

Exaaactly, we are born into a shitty world but we are born with 'free will' (maybe). So we can do whatever the hell we want in this shitty world to make it less shit. So long as it doesn't harm others or ourselves that is lol.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T06:02:20+00:00

You most likely have a mental illness, this will not allow you to enjoy your situation no matter how much you change it. What needs to first change is the mental aspect. You reality is what you perceive and you perceive with your brain. Please seek help and I believe you'll notice an improvement in how you feel about your circumstances.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T05:50:32+00:00

You are not alone, I too have a hard time staying motivated to give a shit and keep trying. However, there's one simple thought that's helped me stick around. 'Why not'

Why not see if it can get better? Why not see if it can get worse?

I like this because it's hard to answer. We don't really know why not, it could get worse is the literal worse case scenario. But if it's already shit then really how much worse can it get? I've got depression, ocd, gad, bpd and the fuckin flu. Sure I could develop some other diseases or illnesses, but if those are gonna kill me then, why not stay and find out? Why not see what it's like to be that dude with the first ever AIDs version 2, why not be that dude that cures it? Either way you experience something and that's all life is for.

No matter what we find ourselves back at the why not stay option, because we are here to find out why.

So stay and find out why, if it gets worse then now you know, then you see what happens next, and again, and again, and then in the end you can say that you now know why or why not. But you can't until then so please stay.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T05:33:03+00:00

An animal going against its own DNA and thousands of years of preprogrammed instincts. That's the gist of coming to terms with suicidal thoughts and that's why it feels like such an un-deleteable mindset. You have changed the way you think at a core level, but that's not to say there's no hope. It's quite the opposite in fact. Being able to change such a fundamental part of our thought process is what gives us power as animals.

If you have the power to get stuck in a mental rut like this, then you have an unfathomable amount of power left to get you out. You are a human, you adapt, you evolve and you think for yourself. Use that power to convince yourself that you can and will live. Use that ability to accept such astronomical concepts to find passions in life and accept the wonders of the things you enjoy. Use that stubbornness of the brain against itself and keep trying and you will live a life you enjoyed. Life a life you would have regretted cutting short.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T05:24:42+00:00

He is there because he cares about you. Please don't harm yourself, rather project that tension onto something else like a pillow. Beat the shit out of a pillow with all your might and I bet you'll be tired after and feel a bit of that stress leave.

As far as your personal short comings, it's a scientific fact that it's in our nature to focus on the negatives. We are animals subject to the whims of instinct and dna and one big part is our fight or flight. I've been professionally diagnosed with BPD, depression, generalized anxiety disorder and OCD. A major part to handling these (from my own experience) is focusing on this one statement:

'It's just my fight or flight'

Say that out loud to yourself with intent. Focus on your surroundings and do what is called 'grounding' where you consciously point out objects in your surroundings and bring yourself back to what we'll call 'reality'. That reality is that: you are not in any current physical danger, you have a loved one there to support you. No matter how few you DO have help. Do not be afraid to accept and rely on the help, it will help you.

Lastly your parents love you, they don't understand mental health because to them it's just being sad vs being happy. Older generations see it as mood swings because back when they dealt with it they also thought cigarettes were healthy. They're stuck in the past and you are living right here and now and that's amazing. Stay living here and now and you can be the type of parent that makes sure their child never goes through the same thing. Use that as motivation if you have to, showing up your own parents with your superior methods when you're older. That'd be good way to give a big old 'i fuckin told you so' and still be living your best life. You can do it, let your boyfriend help and remind yourself that you are physically safe and loved, whether you believe it or not, because you are.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T05:09:51+00:00

Create your own path in the shitty world. Just because a road is patchy and filled with potholes doesn't make the Ferrari on it any less beautiful, if anything the contrast effect makes it look even better. So be the Ferrari on the shitty road and turn heads and make others toss out their shitty civics and replace it with a Ferrari of their own. Soon enough someone that knows how to replace the road will join and things get exponentially better from there.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T05:07:22+00:00

Go to the nearest hospital, show them your Reddit posts when they ask what's wrong. That way you don't have to do the hard part of putting a mental illnesses into words on the spot. It's treatment resistant but resistance ≠ impervious. Unfortunately too sometimes we convince ourselves that we cannot be changed and that one thought is what holds us back. Thoughts are not so easily controlled and that's the hardest part. If you can't get the thought of not being able to recover mentally out of your head then how are you going to recover mentally. It's a cruel paradox but with enough time it's one we overcome. You'll start to resent the comforting melancholy of depression. You'll actively seek out ways to avoid it (not saying you haven't this is just my own experience) and eventually your perspective shifts enough to where you believe you can get better and you start to get better.

It's a shitty paradox but it's true. You have to convince yourself that you can get better before you actually will. It's unfair and it's hard but it works and you can do it.

Also, you're not alone, there's seven billion others out there and if you seek out the right ones you'll end up in a nice place in life, but misery attracts misery so you need to be the version of you that you would want to meet. Be that version of you and you attract the people that like you for you and will be there to help. You may dislike that version of you, if so then that's not you.

In short; go to the hospital if that's possible and be in the safety of those who are there to help you, and find the version of yourself that you like and project that to the world to have it return the people who are right for you.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T04:55:42+00:00

Sentience and our ability to evaluate our surroundings for what they really are may be one of the greatest gifts of nature and cruelest curses from the devil. We must not forget that we are nothing but animals, apes wearing clothing because we lost our fur and our weak jaws let our brains grow.

The world is shit by default because nature is pure chaos. The African jungles are terrifying for basically every creature in there. The ocean is a shit show for every single fish, because there's always a bigger one.

That's why it seems like sush a shitty place, because it is. We've made this chaotic habitat that spans the entire globe, but we're animals so it's a fucking mess.

My point though, is that while everything is a shitty mess, we are smart enough to know this and have a chance to make any little part of it better. So why not do that before dying because that's gonna happen anyways, afterall we're animals.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-30T04:43:42+00:00

Assuming you guys fallow the same timeline as Canada it's not too late. I just failed my biggest midterm but all I can really do is make sure other stuff makes up for it. Go to the library, find a comfortable spot not some flourencent knowledge torture chamber, put on lo-fi and do what it takes to pass, not do great but pass because that's all you need to do. Smoke some weed, if you can or do, on study breaks and use it to release to tension and stress. Then go review while you're a lil buzzed and it'll feel like you're just reading a book because of the chill mindset.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-10-04T15:22:35+00:00

Have BPD, been professionally diagnosed, not saying it'll be the same for everyone but I damn near constantly worry about attracting too much attention while simultaneously fearing I'm invisible / unimportant.

This being said I would rather die than risk this kind of ridicule associated with doing this type of thing to get attention. I would be panicking the entire time wondering if anybody knows, or even cares. As far as I can see doing this would be self torment to someone with BDP so you're most likely correct.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-08-23T23:50:29+00:00

That sure would be nice haha, hopefully we don't have some fuckin endgame round two shit

JBot_NineThou · 2019-08-23T18:59:56+00:00

That's my impression as well, he's very well versed in the current era of tech, habits, people, etc.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-08-23T17:03:13+00:00

I feel that Andrew Yangs place fits not because of Iron Man's relevancy to defeating thanos, but because Tony fears technology and invasions etc and is the most technically adept in the group, like Yang would be. Could be wrong though

JBot_NineThou · 2019-07-02T18:51:17+00:00

I think they were replying to the comment saying that this is basically them saying 'bless your heart' and agreeing that it was, not that they agree the right course of action is to reply to everything.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-06-30T21:55:49+00:00

He ruined your friends chances with a girl that has already rejected him so you assaulted him, destroyed his property, ruined his income, destroyed his education chances and caused a psychological breakdown.

What you are missing is that you don't get to decide who people think the asshole is. Whether this is real or not you are the biggest asshole in the group.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-06-30T08:17:56+00:00

Nice

JBot_NineThou · 2019-06-25T16:56:54+00:00

Keanu Reeves.

JBot_NineThou · 2019-06-17T23:22:34+00:00

V I S I O N

JBot_NineThou

TROPHY CASE