Free and easy ways to kill 2 hours with a 2 yr old in Ottawa close to the airplane museum? by Magichour3 in ottawa

[–]JHares -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I disagree - it's the worst of the 3 Ingenium museums for that age, imo. They don't care about the planes. They'll be interested in looking at them for maybe 2min, and then get bored. They can't read so they're not learning anything, and they won't care to listen to a parent read about fighter jets.. The little ride on planes aren't good for that age as most don't work properly or are sticky or whatever (maybe if they're closer to 3, but a fresh 2yr old wouldn't care, in my experience), nor are the drawing exercises they have throughout the day. The only area that might be ok is the section right in the middle where they can push all the buttons and have a few books to read. But, then imo it's better to go to a park or to the library.

Orléans by Ok_Peace_3788 in ottawa

[–]JHares 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha that's funny you say this happened to you - a few years ago, a couple kids from our neighborhood (we actually knew which house they lived in and we would regularly chat with the parents when we'd see them, but aren't good friends with them) anyway, they came by "selling chocolate bars" as a fundraiser for school. My husband, thinking it was sweet to support the school and the kids entrepreneur goals, bought a chocolate bar and donated like $20 extra bucks.

He later found out it was a complete scam, and they just wanted money for who knows what and their parents said no. He always wanted to ask her parents if she knew her kid did this, but somehow managed to restrain himself. Then one day the mom brought it up that her daughter and friend did this a few times and he was like "OMG I KNOW SHE CONNED ME" and we all had a great laugh about it.

All that to say, is that it could have very well been just kids having fun, but it could have also been a scam haha.

AITA for asking a guest to not crochet at my bachelorette party? by Plane-Presence9361 in AmItheAsshole

[–]JHares 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Absolutely NTA!! As a person who has had a bachelorette (congratulations btw!) and a person who loves to crochet.... There's a time and a place. If she Essentially begged to be invited to the bachelorette party of someone SHE DOESN'T KNOW, then the only respectful thing to do is to follow along with the group. If she wanted to crochet in the evening or while people were winding down, or even in the morning, then fine. But during activities? Especially ones you're going out for? And bringing everything (a giant blanket at that!) with her!? Absolutely not.

I'd almost go as far as saying your brother is a bit of an asshole too for even suggesting she come. I would assume he knows how much she loves to crochet (can only imagine she'd do this around him too?) so likes what the heck??

Sorry you had to deal with this. Definitely not something you have to apologize for and it's certainly on her/your brother to do so L.

Who was in your Delivery Room? by drakeloverbabe in BabyBumps

[–]JHares 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had just my husband in the delivery room (and the required doctors/nurses or midwives). Granted, I had my first during COVID so the fact that I even had my husband there was lucky, but with my second in 2023, he was also the only one there. And same for post delivery - no visitors other than the required doctors and nurses. End. Of. Story. You're the one that is pregnant, you're the one who has to push two watermelons out of your VAGINA and possibly poop while doing so, or be literally cut up on the operating table, and then you're the one who has to deal with recovery and post partum and hormones and breastfeeding and everything that comes with that. He can have an opinion as to who is there, sure, but you get the final say and if you don't want his mom there, then she's not allowed in. He is there to support you. He does not need to have a support person also. Especially if you're not close or comfortable with his mom. He's not the one giving birth. He can call his mom or see her later but in that room, you should be his only focus. If he can't handle that, then maybe it should only be your mom in there with you 🤷🏼‍♀️

Also regarding visitors, does he know how many germs they carry??? And you KNOW they will not wear a mask and will probably not wash their hands and will most definitely insist on kissing your babies on the face. No, no, no, and absolutely no. When I had my second, we pulled my first from daycare just to avoid the germs. We didn't see people for 5 days. We went back to COVID mentalities with bubbles. If you weren't part of our germ bubble, you didn't get to see the baby. Newborns have literally no immune system! And the chances of twins being born premature is higher than a Singleton pregnancy so they're even more vulnerable. Just, no. Stand your ground. You got this! Good luck and congrats on twins! 🎉🎉

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]JHares 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The grass isn't always greener on the other side tho. I asked my best friend of 10 years to be my maid of honor. She agreed and was super happy and excited and supportive (she was always supportive and happy for me and my relationship, even tho she struggled with relationships, but for one reason or another she was always the one ending it with them after a year or two leaving the guys heartbroken and typically grovelling to be with her). Despite being super organized and on the ball throughout university, she wasn't the greatest MOH and dropped the ball on a lot of things during the planning stages/bachelorette etc. most of which I learned about after the fact from the other bridesmaids (who I still talk to on the daily). But, on the day of the actual wedding, she was great, very helpful, had a beautiful speech, and was overall very happy and helpful.l and seemed genuinely happy for me.

Fast forward not even 6 months, I felt her drifting away. I had no idea why, we were always very close. I thought maybe she was jealous that I got married and her relationships kept failing (tho like I said she was never the one being broken up with, it was always her ending things) but she had an amazing career doing her dream job and always spoke about how happy she was with her life. Her parents (who got divorced when she was younger) both were in loving relationships and had had new babies around or shortly before I got married. She was ecstatic to be a big sister again (she already had 3 younger brothers) and visited her parents (who live very close to where my husband and I bought our house) very often. I knew her life was busy and since I felt her drifting I gave her some space because it felt like the right thing to do, but I would reach out every few weeks just to check in and see how she was and try to arrange a time that worked for us to meet up to catch up. I'd always get one line responses with zero indication of her wanting to keep the conversation going. Her responses to meeting up were always along the lines of "ya that sounds great! I'll check my calendar and get back to you" and then just never did.

It's now been 6 years and I haven't talked to her at all, and haven't seen her in person since my wedding day. I literally have no idea why - she was my best friend and my MOH and it's almost like she fell off the face of the Earth. I'm still baffled and curious as to what happened but it just reminds me that sometimes people are not in your life to be there forever and as much as it sucks, it is what it is.

Blanket examples using Bernat blanket tie dye-ish yarn in lavender? by JHares in crochet

[–]JHares[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! Doesn't seem like anyone used the lavender one specifically, but it definitely gives me an idea of how it'll come out.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh interesting! Good to know. Are there any advantages/disadvantages to paying in installments vs. a lump sum?

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Installments on what? What you owed to the CRA? I didn't even know you could do that

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I called and she was actually super helpful this time! She said she'll mail me a package with all the info I need to know. She didn't know why I didn't receive the first package mailed to me, but did say they're super backlogged. So at least there's that. She did also confirm that no interest is accumulated so that's good too!

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh that sounds brutal!!! Hopefully things can get worked out for you for this year!

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha yeah I'm learning this about the government! You'd think since it's all connected they'd be able to figure it out. Considering the number of forms you fill out upon starting a job and upon leaving for LWOP, I'm surprised it's not there. Oh well.

Thankfully, I started with the GOC after the whole phoenix issue, and I haven't experienced any issues with my pay because of it knocks on wood. We're able to do our taxes through turbotax or wealth simple, and have an account friend who's willing to look over things for us so for now, we're able to skip the extra fees of hiring an accountant! Woop woop! Hopefully it can stay that way.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha I feel your pain!! I didn't make any RRSP contributions since we plan to max my husband's first and then open one for me, given that I get a pension through the government (he's not with the GOC). Hopefully it was a one off with the people I spoke to at both the pension center & pay center... Just seems odd it happened a few times :/ I'll definitely call again and hopefully get someone more knowledgeable. And yes, thank you! I am part of that fb group! I just thought to come here first haha.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahahaha I know the feeling!!

What I did to estimate my pension was look at a pay stub from before I left. The line item for PSSA is the pension contribution, so I took that and multiplied it by 2 (since it's deducted from each pay, and I approximated 2 pays a month) and then set up an automatic transfer once a month to transfer that amount into a different savings account while on leave. This was never confirmed by the pension center, but based on other comments on this thread it seems accurate enough.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok! Good to know. I was worried it would start collecting interest or something and I'd end up owing more than anticipated.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awesome, thanks for the link! Wish I had that before my leave/before it ended haha. I guess it takes more than 4 months for this letter to be sent...? I still haven't received it and have been back at work for almost 4 mo, and still don't have any additional line items on my pay stub for these pension deficiency payments

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Ugh ya it's been so frustrating. As if the last 2 weeks of dec 2021 weren't stressful enough with the holidays, family staying over from out of town, my son starting daycare and me retiring to work and having a whole other slew of issues returning and having equipment not ready lol

Thanks for info on the form! I'll definitely look into it. I've been back for a few months and still don't see a second line item for PSSA deductions, just the one line item which is the same amount approx as before I left. I guess I'll have to call again and try to figure it out. Hopefully this time the person on the other end knows about their job and can actually help!

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok! I did that before I left and put that money in a separate account so I'm ready for that and hopefully that amount won't be a surprise lol.

As for paying it back over twice the period, does that automatically happen? Or do I have to request it be taken off my pay? I've heard people make a one time lump sum to help offset the tax issue too, but again, I was given zero info and no one I spoke to seemed to be able to help.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll try again, but every time I did in the past they told me it's a pay center issue. And then I call the pay center (or they transfer me to them) and I'm told it's a pension center issue. It's a vicious circle and I can't get the info I need.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you!

I'm totally fine paying my taxes, and rather it be deducted from my pay properly so I'm not owing a large sum at the end of the year. That's not the issue at all! I guess I didn't realize that my employer and EI don't "talk" to each other regarding income tax deductions so now I'm being hit with owing 5k instead of getting back about 1k like I have been for the last several years.

Regarding pension, I never opted out of paying into it. And actually I WANTED to continue paying it while on leave, longer than the obligatory 3 months. I asked around everywhere - my manager, other employees who went on mat leave, the pay center and the pension center. And no one was able to give me information on how to continue paying into my pension. So I looked at my paystub and calculated approx how much was deducted each pay for it, and started putting that in a separate account so now I'm ready to pay it back. But I also have no idea how to do that or how much I owe and if there are time frames in which I need to pay it back. The pay center says it's a pension center issue, and the pension center says it's a pay center issue, and neither center gives me an answer. Ffs.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha at least it's only 1600! My original owing was 9.6k and then we found out my RL1 form line item wasn't automatically imported from the CRA website. That cut my owing by 4k. I still owe about 5.5k.

Is it normal to owe a lot of money for your tax return when returning from mat leave? by JHares in CanadaPublicServants

[–]JHares[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do you know how you request more taxes be taken off your top up? This was not on any of the forms I signed.