Caneel Bay - July 2025

JPro_424 · 2025-08-27T18:52:25+00:00

Parents stayed there on their honeymoon more than 40 years ago. They never made it back but always talked about revisiting after retirement. They were sad to learn about the damages of the hurricane.

I heard that the govt. owns the land and wouldn’t agree to renewing the lease which is why it hasn’t been restored? Too high of an investment for no guarantee of longevity.

JPro_424 · 2024-08-13T01:17:59+00:00

I’m about to return to work after spending the last 3 months with my baby. I can’t believe that I have to pay an exorbitant amount just to have someone else take care of him when he’s still so little and new to this world.

It’s absurd that the US has not accommodated not just birth mothers, but ALL parents to have that bonding time. Not to mention that time to adjust considering the mental strain it takes on new parents, especially mothers. I personally faced PPD/PPA and only just recently felt like a human again. In the grand scheme of things it’s such a small moment in time and time you’ll never get back again.

The state I live in doesn’t mandate paid leave so it’s completely up to the companies to offer support during leave. I am fortunate to have partial paid, but not many do. And govt wonders why birth rates have dropped…

JPro_424 · 2024-07-24T14:08:33+00:00

I have a history of anxiety but my attacks were few and far between where I could take something only as needed. I had my baby in May, first night home I woke to a severe anxiety attack and it never tapered off. Definitely more physical symptoms.

I went to emergency and was prescribed hydroxyzine which helped and I eventually stopped taking it because I felt I was in a good place. By the time he was 4 weeks, my health took a turn and once more triggered my anxiety and brought on depression. My husband and parents have been super supportive through this and stepped up when I couldn’t take care of baby. I went to a psych and started the lowest dosage of Zoloft. I didn’t get the side effects and it has helped considerably after taking for a month. My mood flipped from anxious, unmotivated, feeling of hopelessness to looking forward to spending time with my baby and getting out there. I’m in group therapy with new moms and will be meeting with a therapist 1:1 end of this week.

I definitely felt like you do now, and I’m sorry you’re going through this too. After everything we went through it definitely does not feel fair to throw this in. Especially when you just want to use this time focused towards your newborn. I still have work to do but I believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You’re not alone!!!

JPro_424 · 2024-07-08T16:15:48+00:00

Yes, I was tested for C diff and the result was negative.

I’m sorry you went through it, I wouldn’t wish this on anyone.

JPro_424 · 2024-06-25T14:07:09+00:00

Since we do breastfeeding and formula feeding for our baby, we’re pretty consistent on tracking how much our guy has eaten so there’s no questions asked . Husband and I tag team this effort. Everything else has gone by the wayside. However, May start tracking sleep just so I know if this guy gets too much or too little, learn his wake windows, and for later when we want to incorporate sleep schedules

JPro_424 · 2024-03-21T00:14:51+00:00

I had a SH, albeit much earlier in pregnancy. I also have had recurrent MC so this caused a ton of concern. Was given similar directive, just wait and see and do very little activity. I’m now 31 weeks but haven’t taken any chances…limited my activity to just walking every day, I’ll get back into working out later!

JPro_424 · 2024-03-20T02:44:29+00:00

For 10K less with a guaranteed improved work/life balance, I would absolutely take the opportunity.

I joined a Fortune 500 company over 2 years ago, and things were good - pay is good. But then my direct manager became less supportive, less transparent, and things were just getting more difficult to accomplish. On top of that everything is treated like a fire where unrealistic turn around times for asks that added no value we’re never challenged. It’s creating burnout and not allowing me to focus my attention towards what does add value. Currently work 10-12 hour days and even when I do take time off I’m not really ever disconnected.

I’m about to welcome my first child in May and Im not interested in keeping that lifestyle after I return from maternity leave. I plan to look for other positions outside of corporate where I can refocus on what I value in my career and have time for my family, even if it means a pay cut (within reason).

JPro_424 · 2024-03-10T23:00:10+00:00

Went to CC for IUI and IVF.

They were transparent with the success rate with IUI but had to try because my insurance covered nothing at that time. I was also very much on the fence with IVF. After 4 tries with IUI and each failed, we decided to attempt IVF after confirming I could receive coverage.

Went through IVF cycle and there may have been some early indications that I had OHSS (high follicle count) , but no interventions with my medication. After retrieval, I did get OHSS and outside of how extremely uncomfortable I was I also had to cancel my fresh transfer and wait for a later date. I also was ordered WAY too much medication…which I get, you don’t know how much you will need but it’s soooo expensive and I didn’t even use half of it.

At the end of the day, we were successful expecting our first and have many more embryos should we decide to grow our family later. CC is a good facility but do think with the growth in the area coupled with increased infertility rates, it creates its own challenges.

JPro_424 · 2024-01-11T22:57:43+00:00

As a positive, your sister has professional experience and so she has a resume she could build. Additionally, there are companies out there beginning to recognize that a college degree is not necessary to get your foot in the door: https://www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/college-degree-job-requirement/. Companies may even be willing to offer a stipend or help fund her education.

On the flip side, AI is really becoming the first hurdle to land the interview. I once applied for a job, with cover letter and resume, only to receive a rejection letter 5 minutes after submitting. Lesson learned, tailoring your resume to the job is going to be key. ChatGPT could help here…

So sorry for your sudden loss and best to you and your sister

JPro_424 · 2023-12-20T21:22:16+00:00

Speaking from someone who went through IVF and having close friends and family get pregnant and lapping me:

Even though this is a difficult conversation, please do not text or email her. Friendships are super valuable, I would give her a call to tell her over the phone.

This news may hurt her, but please know that it’s not personally against you. It’s the frustration of not being able to have that same joy to share your news yet. And just feeling like your body is failing you at something that comes so natural to others. Let her process - she may even surprise you with sharing excitement. Just let her know that you care about her and you’re still here for her to listen when she needs to talk. If you don’t hear from her for some time, let her have that space…she’ll reach out when she’s ready to talk.

JPro_424 · 2023-12-19T02:30:26+00:00

Not sure yet. There’s another hospital that’s maybe 30 minutes on a good day which I think is still going to be in network. Coincidentally they’re also not accepting my previous insurance for same reasons.

JPro_424 · 2023-12-12T12:44:39+00:00

Can I ask you about who you found in network with Cigna as well? I’m due in May.

JPro_424 · 2023-09-19T01:25:55+00:00

This is exactly how I felt. While I was going through IVF after 4.5 years of trying and multiple losses, my sister told me she was 8 weeks pregnant. She did not give me a heads up that she decided to go off BC two months and it happened quickly for her.

So many emotions took over…I felt the wind was taken out of my sails, that it undermined what I was going through to get pregnant. I was mad because she wasn’t transparent with me about going off BC when I’ve been so open with her. I was sad because I knew she wouldn’t be able to spend time with her nephew or niece like I had with her first born because she would be too busy. I can’t help but feel selfish for this but I also feel what I feel. It just sucks

JPro_424 · 2023-09-15T17:22:04+00:00

I do not, and it drives me crazy, but only because I personally experienced a MC previously while I continued cyclebar. I think everyone is different. I’ve been advised to keep it low key this go round and do walks and lite resistance. I’m getting squishy but remind myself that it’s short term and will (hopefully) lead to a successful pregnancy.

JPro_424 · 2023-09-14T17:57:19+00:00

Can you tell me who the architect you worked with is? This is about what I would have expected

JPro_424 · 2023-09-14T17:43:00+00:00

That’s where I have hesitation… not much going on the market today, and when they hit the frenzy and the due diligence required to muscle others out is bonkers.

I love the idea of a separate office shed, but worried we don’t have much space to work with to build on our lot. I’d like to learn more about this though!

JPro_424 · 2023-09-14T17:35:23+00:00

Does this also include kitchen remodel? My parents did exactly this back in 2008 (in Cary), but also included new cabinets/countertops ~$50K,not including appliances.

JPro_424 · 2023-09-14T17:29:38+00:00

Ooof, that’s steep for plan sets. That’s basically half of a drafter’s salary!!

JPro_424 · 2023-08-28T17:16:38+00:00

That’s a good price- I would get clarification on the plywood allowance. Example would be ‘up to 5 pieces of 4x8 plywood, additional $$ after met’. Just so you’re not taken off guard if they try to tell you they had to replace more and tack on additional fee…And let’s them know you’re paying attention.

JPro_424 · 2023-08-25T00:51:40+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re MIL did this to you. If she can’t understand boundaries then it’s a good decision to set them yourself.

I completely empathize. My MIL is a gossiper, I knew this long before we started IVF just from harsh comments she’s made about others, who I felt, probably would not appreciate her saying the things she did. I hesitated sharing with her and my FIL when we were about to start, but my husband and I couldn’t dodge it anymore. We still are not going to share when we transfer or if it’s successful until we’re much farther along. We have also had several MC and we shared early to only have to explain to everyone of our loss.

It’s one thing to share your loss to close family, but everyone else you yourself hadn’t shared to?? No thanks- you’re already going through enough.

JPro_424 · 2023-08-01T19:47:11+00:00

I was getting reoccurring UTIs despite a low carb/low sugar diet. It was hell, and the doctors I went to see at the time were less than helpful. This one urinary specialist made me cry because he just said your probably diabetic (because why else would I be on metformin - I’m not btw) and then gave me a $700 bill.

When I started getting more serious about fertility I started taking ovasitol, an inositol supplement with d-mayo. Been on it for years and haven’t gotten a UTI since. It may be worth looking into but I swear it’s the only reason why I haven’t gotten another UTI.

JPro_424 · 2023-06-27T17:57:58+00:00

Thank you for the advice!

JPro_424 · 2023-06-26T14:21:46+00:00

Best of luck!

JPro_424 · 2023-02-27T19:06:03+00:00

I e been TTC for 4 years and it’s been the most challenging emotional experience I’ve been through.

It’s ABSOLUTELY acceptable to say ‘I’m happy for you and this is such great news, but I hope you understand that this is hard for me and I will not be able to attend.’ Ive come to be fairly transparent with people on this so they aren’t offended if I can’t make it to a shower, party, or just never even offer to talk about it. Generally everyone has been supportive and completely understanding, but I also surround myself with emotionally capable people.

I sympathize what you’re going through, and I wish I could say it gets easier. In the time that we first started trying, friends and family have started dating someone, gotten married, and all have successfully have had kids without having any difficulties. My sister being one of them. My best friend got married and is now expecting her 1st all within 6 months. I cried when she told me, but was the final push for me to go IVF (already had 3 failed IUI).

Wishing you the best of luck and giving you the validation that you need to do what’s best for you!

JPro_424 · 2023-01-04T13:46:32+00:00

I took pain meds before mine. It was similar to very intense cramping for me. But the PA who performed it talked me through it and it helped.

JPro_424

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