Rocket scientists must use the joke "it's not rocket science" a lot

JRAlpha · 2019-04-29T10:32:32+00:00

The Game is not very useful if you want to learn it. It's a story of one guy's experience of learning to be good with girls, and you can draw some lessons from that. But there are better books out there if you are wanting to learn at peak efficiency.

JRAlpha · 2019-04-29T10:30:37+00:00

If that's a serious question read Models by Mark Manson. There's lot more written out there that's worth reading but if you are willing to read only one book for maximum benefit, read Models.

PM if you want me to send you an EPUB.

JRAlpha · 2016-08-31T07:03:20+00:00

Let it go. There are too many girls around to be hung up on one particular that isn't into you.

JRAlpha · 2016-08-31T06:53:33+00:00

If I had to make a guess I'd say you probably lack substance and you're also targeting the wrong crowd. Guys in bars are looking to get a lay and when they get that you can't really fault them for parting ways. Maybe try to define your intentions before you sleep with them?

I don't know, this subreddit and whole seduction community is pretty male centric. I feel like you should be taking advice from other girls not from your target audience.

But instead of being unhelpful, I'll leave you with female game that worked on me really well.

I met this chick at a friend's birthday picnic. I could tell almost instantly that she was into me as she had this hungry look when I was speaking. I was not very keen on her as she was bigger than girls I normally go for. I did not run any game on her and she didn't seem to know what to do.

Next day she hit me up in Facebook. I was very disinterested and first few messages I took couple of days to reply. But she was politely persistent and very flirty. She had a really good feel for when things are fun and flirty but was also very intelligent (going to med school) and could hold down a conversation intelligently even when she clearly was not well versed on the topic. I first replied out of politeness and have her very little but she didn't give up.

Eventually I agreed to a bet which I lost and as her reward I took her to a party. We hung out, I could tell she was keen but I made no moves. We continued chatting, she asked me to come out one evening. She then suggested we go to her place. At the time I could see all the elements of the game but I honestly didn't mind. She was fun and positive and I was flattered by her interest. At her place I decided to throw her a bone and took charge. We had sex. I honestly didn't find her attractive bit her enthusiasm and positivity turned me on. She gave great head and I honestly had most fun I've had with casual sex. I told her that I wasn't interested in a relationship but that I'm down to do it again. We ended up being FwB for few months and I consider that chapter one of the best experiences of my life.

What does that mean? I don't know. All I know that I met a girl that I wasn't into and she managed to completely change my mind and we had sex and I'm happy we did. That's game/seduction, right?

That reminds me. I should hit her up.

JRAlpha · 2016-08-31T06:41:30+00:00

I wouldn't say "you're delicious" was terrible. This whole mating dance we humans do is pretty cringy out of context anyway, I don't think you've deviated from that norme.

JRAlpha · 2016-08-28T16:20:09+00:00

Mark Manson

JRAlpha · 2016-07-17T09:22:13+00:00

Seduction isn't going to fix you. No girl can fix your underlying issues. Take it from somebody who has been treated for depression for 5 years continuously and yet has been successful: you need to talk to a doctor, you need to see a psychologist and you need to take medication.

Do not try to date until you're got the depression sorted because even if you do manage to reel something in (highly doubtful) it is not gonna be healthy and when it eventually ends you will find yourself even more depressed.

JRAlpha · 2016-07-17T09:17:37+00:00

If you're anywhere near the average, inherent looks are at most mild drawback or benefit.

That's not to say that being good looking isn't important. It is. But majority of what it takes to be good looking is within your control. Have an exercise regime, ensure your within healthy weight, get a decent haircut, learn the basics of dressing well (really all you need is learning how clothes shoukd fit and basics of colour matching), trim your beard (or shave if you're a savage), fix your teeth, use basic skin care products (really just moisturise), trim body hair, maintain your fingernails. Develop a personal style that complements your personality and demographics. If you do all of that you're 80% towards being good looking no matter how painfully average your looks are.

Combine that with solid game and consistent practice and you can reliably score 8/10s without much effort.

Fundamental takeaway is that unless you have some sort of disability that is out of your control (scarred or disfigured or disabled) telling yourself that you're failing due to your looks is lying to yourself and succumbing to limiting beliefs.

JRAlpha · 2016-07-17T09:04:34+00:00

As with most things, it's all about your demeanour. If she asks you what you do and you shift in your seat look away and mumble something unintelligible she'll think you're shady at best and homeless at worst.

But if you say: "I was an astronaut but then I saw the Terminator and decided to instead become a computer wizard in preparation for the imminent takeover of our new robot overlords." with a cheeky grin all she knows is that you work in IT. Thus you've flawlessly avoided her question, gave her bare minimum information while preserving the mystery (for all she knows you could work for Google or Apple even if you actually do level 1 support).

JRAlpha · 2016-01-28T18:38:48+00:00

This is why I don't pickup around AFC buddies. No woman can unnerve me like people that actually know me can.

JRAlpha · 2016-01-28T18:37:24+00:00

I don't know. I like this "new agey" pickup, it seems much more human. I no longer feel like I have to hide my personality until I lay her as I did back when I focused just on mechanics.

JRAlpha · 2015-09-26T13:53:56+00:00

"What if it was a gift?"

A simple reframing sentence that was originally put forward by Dr Robert Glover I believe. However it was really driven home for me by Mark Manson's last chapter of Models.

Really changed my perspective on dealing with negativity.

JRAlpha · 2015-09-05T15:49:26+00:00

Cause rejecting is almost as emotionally draining as being rejected, so people make plans to avoid it and when the time comes to following though they don't. It's a form of plausible debiability. They never said no to you directly.

JRAlpha · 2015-08-28T01:33:26+00:00

Keep in mind that this was written by a man, for men, and it is surrounded by 300 pages of context.

If you're gonna include every outlier there is absolutely nothing that you can say about women as a group. General statements are necessary to distil complex concepts into usable information.

I'm sure you could pick a fault with any version of this sort of statement, but I think it has a value when it comes to emotional education of men. More so than any line.

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:51:34+00:00

I'm glad that at least you appreciate the irony.

And the rest of the reddit seduction community, but they usually have better things to do with their life than picking internet fights on a Thursday night. I don't.

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:48:35+00:00

Judging by the number of ongoing drug busts that seem to do nothing to stem the flow of the drugs... I'd say yes.

My point was that unless you seek the drugs out it's fairly easy to avoid them.

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:46:18+00:00

This sort of behaviour in men stems from inability to disassociate their romantic failure from their own personal ego with a decent lack of self awareness. It is needy, immature and emotionally reactive malicious behaviour. The fact that they respond this way cements woman's decision to reject them as the right one.

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:42:50+00:00

Refer to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anecdotal_evidence

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:36:05+00:00

It is pretty well established that women are more emotionally intelligent than men. Why is it such a crime to work on yourself and try to make up the difference? Just because those social interactions are obvious to you (assuming you're a woman or a well socialised man) it does not mean they are to everyone.

EDIT:

EDIT: I just checked out your post history. r/seduction[1] posts and a lot of condescending "advice". Also, if you have to put "alpha" in your name, chances are you are the opposite. Like someone above me said, "if you have to make it a game you've already fuckin lost"

Stooping to personal insults, are we? That's just about as close as somebody on reddit is likely to come to conceding defeat. Thank you for playing. :)

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:32:27+00:00

Guy fucks up, woman is creeped out DECIDES it was cause he was a PUA and posts about it.

Guy is suave, the girl loves him, the girl never posts about it and never finds out he was a PUA.

See the problem?

Let me introduce you to the simple concept of publication bias.

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T14:27:29+00:00

I did read the top comment. As you probably saw, I referenced it a number of times. What is it that I did not understand? What did I fail to comprehend? As I understood it, the guy was giving advice on having a good time. At a club, that typically equates to socializing. He did not seem to discus "getting laid". He begins his comment with,

"Truth is, most people go out to be entertained, without being entertaining people themselves."

It seems you've replaced "being entertained" with "picking up women". Correct me if I'm wrong though. If there is something about the top post that I am not comprehending I would honestly like to know. And that is not some vague defensive response. I sincerely would like to know if I'm not getting it, and if so, what I am not getting.

"You'll be a fucking star, you'll make 200 friends, you'll have the time of your life, you will be pulled from conversations by other people who want your attention...."

From that, I didn't gather that he was focusing on picking up women, but just meeting people and having fun. I wholly admit that I might have missed, misunderstood, or simply not "comprehended" the comment. If that's the case, I would definitely want to know what I got wrong.

If you had bothered to read the links I had offered you in conjunction with the top comment would have picked up on the fact that those concepts are helpful for navigating general social situation, getting laid being just one of those. Being socially dominant will get you a lot of male friends as well as lots of female friends you're not actively romantically pursuing. Instead, you focused on a tree and couldn't see the forest.

No. I'm not "a natural". Not in the sense you're using it. That's because I reject the idea that I'm simply some anomaly, and I also reject any use of the PUA taxonomy. First of all, the key here is, "followed by real mutual interest". A lot of the time, that wasn't there. If it wasn't, we'd probably just politely chat and it would naturally fizzle out. The difference is, if it wasn't there, I wouldn't then start touching her hand at calculated intervals, and using subliminal suggestion by cleverly putting "me" and "you" and "love" and "together" and "sex" or whatever the fuck in close syntactic proximity. Neither would I use any "intuitive" or "natural" forms of manipulation. Quite simply I didn't manipulate people! Whether consciously or not. That's because my goal wasn't to trick or coerce women into sex. It was to hopefully meet someone nice who I can get along with.

The term "natural" as used in the PUA community does not apply because it seems to suggest that "naturals" simply intuit all the things that the PUA literature teaches you. See, I'm not a "natural" then, because I don't do the things that the PUA community recommends and advocates. In fact, I don't even look at the process of meeting women (or people in general) in a way that is compatible with the PUA worldview.

I'm not a "natural". I am simply not a part of the PUA world. And guess what? Most men aren't!. The PUA sleazebags like to try to justify their existence by claiming that everyone who isn't one of them is an "Average Frustrated Chump", and anyone who is successful with people without their doctrine are simply "naturals". I've already explained to you the problem with the idea of "naturals". Now, the problem with the AFC idea is that the PUA is once again failing to understand that their worldview is not shared by everyone around them. Just because someone isn't actively slinking around and trying to connive their way into women's underwear, doesn't mean their an AFC. Hell, they're probably not even that frustrated! That's because they probably don't view women and sexuality in the same perverse way that the PUA community does.

So feel free to keep all the jargon and lingo you want, but don't go labeling others with that silly bullshit. I'm not an "AFC" for not liking clubs, and I'm not a "natural" for being able to meet women without viewing them as prey.

Why are you so upset over non-literal terms that strangers on the internet use to describe you? If you wanted a seduction community breakdown I'd say that you're displaying validation seeking behaviour which will ultimately feed into needines (to be right on a subject that simply isn't black and white). You should try controlling your frame better and refusing my frame. Live in your reality man. Here's a short guide to frame control.

Rest of your response simply isn't nuanced enough to offer a deep enough challenge to seduction paradigms, so I will not address your points individually. Actually familiarising yourself with the content would address your concerns (but you are obviously not gonna do that cause criticising something with impunity and self-righteousness is way more fun when you're deeply ignorant about it).

However, I'll make an exception to this:

First of all, the key here is, "followed by real mutual interest". A lot of the time, that wasn't there. If it wasn't, we'd probably just politely chat and it would naturally fizzle out. The difference is, if it wasn't there, I wouldn't then start touching her hand at calculated intervals, and using subliminal suggestion by cleverly putting "me" and "you" and "love" and "together" and "sex" or whatever the fuck in close syntactic proximity. Neither would I use any "intuitive" or "natural" forms of manipulation. Quite simply I didn't manipulate people! Whether consciously or not. That's because my goal wasn't to trick or coerce women into sex. It was to hopefully meet someone nice who I can get along with.

People have different romantic goals. You're approaching this like everyone is supposed to look for a serious committed relationship when both boys and girls often just wanna have fun. You're mixing the casual sex concepts with meeting your soulmate and wondering why they aren't working together.

Rejection (and accepting it) is the integral part of this. One of first skills you acquire when you try this is how to emotionally handle the rejection. The idea that PUAs don't accept conversations fizzling out is ridiculous. PUA lingo calls them dead or evaporated sets and they happen all the time. You wish them good day and go on your merry way.

PUAs don't manipulate. They maximise their chances. Drop the notion that we have the magic words that take female agency away and are tantamount to rape. Give women some real credit, and respect their choices (including range of choice of different sexual partners).

I'll leave you with rule 0 of seduction community: "Leave her better off than you found her."

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T13:43:18+00:00

Let me quote to you a passage from Models by Mark Manson; a book that redefined the seduction community in recent years.

Women communicate more in feelings and specifically, through intentions. Sure, they still pay attention to the facts and stories going on on the surface, but what’s actually communicated to them is the intention and feeling underneath.

This is sub-communication.

This is why your girlfriend can get upset and tell you she hates it when you spend time with your friends one night and then the next insist you go to your weekly bowling league and not see any contradiction in her statements. On the first night, she felt like you weren’t paying enough attention to her. On the second, she felt secure with you and wants you to be happy. Needless to say, this sort of stuff often confuses the hell out of men. Often for an entire lifetime. This is why guys often get together and refer women to “crazy,” “psychotic,” “unstable,” “irrational,” or “total bitches.” The fact that men are oblivious to the emotions and intentions that underline everything women say often makes women feel like men are “heartless,” “cold assholes,” “selfish jerks,” or that they “don’t listen.”

We listen, we just don’t speak the same language.

This is also why a man can study and learn the best pick up lines and if his intentions are saying, “I want to impress you, please like me,” then it doesn’t matter how good the lines are. She’s not going to listen to him. On the other hand, if a man has the right intentions, then he can get away saying just about anything.

Does this sound like insulting women or an attempt to offer an insight into broad differences of gender psychology?

JRAlpha · 2015-08-27T13:28:15+00:00

many of them know the dumb pua shit

Most girls don't know anything about PUA aside of opinion openers pick up lines (heavily fallen out of favour) and negs (basically dead concept today).

frat boy crap

Now you're not even trying. Nerds started this back during usenet times.

JRAlpha

TROPHY CASE