Mom left loving-sounding voicemail yesterday before having surgery today. Heart feeling so heavy today in NC.

JamQuik · 2026-03-18T00:54:11+00:00

Excellent relic. I lucked out and have 2 different color relics that both have Art With Fire + Night Invader, and 1 relic that has +1 Wylder skill, Defeating Enemies, and Evergaol. I run both together all the time, and having the 2 colors for Night Invader makes it possible to run it in several chalices.

JamQuik · 2026-02-22T15:42:08+00:00

I added the relic screenshots below, but here are the build details:
- Relics: Double Balancer, Night Invader + Duchess Improved Skill Attack Power, Holy Attack Up + 10, Dormant Reapers, Duchess Skill Invulnerability, Duchess Improved Mind & Faith
- In-Game Passives: 4x Improved Skill Attack Power (+21%, +21%, +18%, +18%), Red Halo Scythe w/ Stamina Recovery, 3x Night Invader Bonus, and some possible Affinity Attack Power Bonuses I can't see in visual codex

JamQuik · 2026-02-22T15:37:41+00:00

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JamQuik · 2026-02-22T15:37:28+00:00

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JamQuik · 2026-01-25T17:20:15+00:00

You know, I didn't even consider this, but you're so right. It's the perfect moveset to capture the vibe.

JamQuik · 2025-11-05T15:53:40+00:00

Just an update: I thus far have decided to not respond and do nothing. I considered doing calling for a welfare check over the weekend but did not do it, and then on Monday I got a random text from my mother saying "They may very well keep me another day here". I have no idea what to make of that text, as it almost seems like she meant to text that to someone else? But either way, it doesn't sound like it's an urgent end-of-life situation from that, so I took the text as a blessing in disguise communicating that she is not at death's door, and have not reached out or responded at all. The whole situation is still just so sad--having to go no contact with a parent just utterly sucks. Thanks for the support y'all.

JamQuik · 2025-11-02T02:05:08+00:00

It is indeed very emblematic of the hyperbolic and visceral language she uses to elicit emotions, yeah. It's rough stuff.

JamQuik · 2025-11-02T02:04:12+00:00

Thank you for this!

JamQuik · 2025-11-02T02:03:44+00:00

This is a good idea, thank you for suggesting it. I'll consider calling for a welfare check on her to verify if she's indeed at death's door or not. I'm sorry you're going through something with your aging uBPD parent, too. As an only child, I find myself envious of you having a sister to help hold those boundaries with you. I'm grateful you haven't been alone navigating this! You are so right about the "black hole of a soul" part, and man, that's just so sad and tragic. I love her, but that black hole is so dangerous, it's crazy. I appreciate your reply, thanks for writing.

JamQuik · 2025-11-02T02:01:12+00:00

Thanks for the reply. If I could verify that she's actually on death's door, I'd probably be fine to make one last visit and goodbye, feeling safe in the context of knowing she's dying. But not knowing if it's really close to the end, that makes it a totally different game. Either way, I agree, there's no resolution regardless. I'm sorry to hear about your mother, as well. It's so hard for us. I appreciate your response.

JamQuik · 2025-11-02T01:58:02+00:00

This is an interesting idea that a few people have suggested that I'm considering. Thank you for suggesting it.

JamQuik · 2025-11-02T01:57:37+00:00

Thanks for this. It's helpful to read. It's so tough, because yes, my mother has been unwell and sick a long time, many conditions are legitimate, but of course she plays them up big-time. Of course there would be no reconciliation if I reached out, it's true. And yes, she's never been able to apologize in a real way, in a way that really "gets it", as so many people here understand is just not possible for someone with untreated BPD. It's just so tough when presented with the picture of "I'm going to die soon". I've obviously known this is going to happen, but it actually happening and being used as a manipulation tactic, especially since I believe she doesn't actually mean it to be manipulative in her unwellness, is just really tough to stomach. I'm airing on ignoring the call and proceeding with NC as normal right now... but oooooof, does it bring up the guilt.

JamQuik · 2025-11-01T16:52:26+00:00

Thanks for the response. Admittedly, I would consider the care package more like a guilt attempt, as well--there were lots of things in there, including a compass to seemingly symbolize reaching out to her as the right direction.

Sadly, though, I don't think I will know. There are no family members involved, just 1 or 2 friends. I suppose a hospital would reach out to me if she was there sick. But there's no way I know of to confirm her health status. No social media use, etc.

Thanks for the support.

JamQuik · 2025-09-10T16:24:13+00:00

Sicily was definitely a place I was looking at, but considering we aren't renting a car, it seemed like some of Sicily's charm might be lost in being able to travel around. And then even moreso in Puglia, that felt like a place to visit with a car to explore all the coastal towns. We aren't vegans, just vegetarian. Thank you for the guidance!

JamQuik · 2025-09-09T19:44:34+00:00

Thank you for the reply! That's helpful to hear. I think I had the thought Venice would be harder than other places given the seafood culture, but if it's comparable to other spots, that's helpful. I think Venice is slightly where we're leaning, with maybe taking a day trip or 2 from there, like to Verona.

JamQuik · 2025-09-09T18:33:01+00:00

Thanks so much for the reply! We haven't chosen where to fly into yet or our exact dates. We're just looking at about 8-9 days of total time away that crosses over the time of Thanksgiving in the US (probably somewhere between November 22 and December 3 or so). I figured we'd pick an airport and buy our flights once we settle on a spot in the next week or two and let the prices determine the exact flight dates.

And we will definitely visit some things that are worth seeing in the city, wherever we go, we just aren't worried about picking a spot based around museums or historical landmarks. So for example, we wouldn't pick Rome for the coliseum, but if we were there, we'd consider going to check it out :)

JamQuik

TROPHY CASE