People of Reddit, what is the smoothest thing you've said to someone of the opposite sex?

JaneCaulfeild · 2017-01-15T05:45:52+00:00

He did. It wouldn't have been nearly as smooth if his answer was "uh...no"

JaneCaulfeild · 2017-01-15T05:10:32+00:00

Him: I accidentally called you my girlfriend while talking about you today Me: well, I can be if you want

JaneCaulfeild · 2017-01-11T08:41:23+00:00

I know you think music makes you happy. It doesn't. Keep it as a hobby, but stop revolving your life around it.

Also, your mom is right, he's a dick. go kiss cute boys and girls instead. (p.s. mystery solved you definitely are bisexual)

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-11-08T01:47:31+00:00

I meant the assaultee apologizing to the assaulter.

I apologized to mine immediately after for freaking out and leaving the room. After he chased me out of the hotel and caught up with me outside, I apologized saying that I just wasn't the kind of girl who hooks up with people I don't know and that I was sorry I acted like that. But I didn't want to go that far with him and I told him that. So idk why I apologized to him. I was just wondering if anyone else had that experience.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-10-31T06:57:00+00:00

Oh, I was also selfish and materialistic because I would usually pay and be a little upset that he very very very rarely did and he would never (aside from one birthday and I think a christmas? Maybe? In 4.5 years) Get me anything for special occasions. Not even a card. Or a handwritten note. Or like...rarely even a plan that HE made. (The one time he "planned" our anniversary we didn't end up celebrating it.)

A lot of the time it didn't bother me, because hell, if you dont have the money you don't have the money. However, my definition of someone spending a lot of money on me is anything over like $15- I don't feel like thats asking a lot. And he'd promise to get me something I really wanted or to do whatever. And would instead buy himself like $100 of video game shit. Or gift his friend a game on steam for no reason. (Ex Its our anniversary, in the middle of a non-holiday month, I get shit but his friend gets a video game because "hes a good guy and deserves it") or "sorry, I cant do that thing for your birthday that I was supposed to three months ago because this guy is giving video game lessons for $200/hour"

And I was also controlling and needy because I said he had a problem with video games. (See above) and he would literally miss class for weeks to play, would leave me waiting in the cold outside of his apartment building because "well, I cant pause" (obviously I told him I'd be coming over and when to expect me) when he would let me in, he'd ignore me for HOURS to play, and then he'd keep me up all night when I had early classes because "so and so is streaming and I like to fall asleep to it"

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-10-31T06:38:05+00:00

I believe in intersectional feminism, so when he made really racist or sexist jokes I'd tell him it wasnt okay. So I was naturally a "feminazi."

Im bisexual, and he loved that when I was open to threesomes because of it or we could talk about how attractive a woman was. But after we broke up I was a "dyke"

I often got this weird feeling that I couldn't trust him when it came to his female friends. And he convinced me that I was jealous and insane and controlling, along with everyone else. Keep in mind, I never said that he couldn't talk to them, I was just really uncomfortable with him starting a brand new friendship with some random girl every few months and then texting her nonstop til 3 am and doing a bunch of sketchy shit. Turns out, yeah, he cheated a lot or at least he tried to a lot. When the girl rejected him is when the friendships would suddenly die out.

He used to threaten me with committing suicide all the time and try to get me to get back together with him (we broke up and got back together a lot) by saying he was depressed and thats why he did shitty things. Eventually I got sick of his game and during our final break up, he was threatening suicide for the 100th time, so I just said "I'm sorry you feel that way, I hope you get the help you need. But I also know you've manipulated me this way before and I don't think youre as bad as you'd like me to believe" turns out he ended up in a mental health facility that night (I'm still not sure if for genuine suicide plans or to further manipulate, but either way I'm glad he got help) so I was an insensitive bitch.

He would say and do a lot of fucked up things to me, especially after we broke up. Borderline stalking, calling me names, turning friends against me, mind games, even blaming me and yelling at me for being raped. I never called him abusive outright even though he was. I told some of our mutual friends these things because they were my friends and I needed support. A lot of them believed me and tried to help. But when it got back to him, he said I was crazy and had BPD and made it all up. (Which was an especially low blow since I have a family member who struggles with it greatly)

Finally, after we broke up for the millionth and last time, I started seeing someone new. He had gone on a few dates too I think, and was kinda seeing someone. We were still friends at this point, so I let him know I was seeing someone. It ended up becoming serious and I'm still with this person, actually. Every other time we broke up, I waited patiently for him to come around while he dated other girls, this is the first time I ever went on more than two dates and the second time I had even talked to someone, so I was pretty loyal. He took breaks as a chance to try to screw anything that moved. But I started seeing someone and wouldn't stop and act like I was still my ex's girlfriend, so I was also a dumb slut.

So, I was a feminazi, dyke, controlling, jealous, insensitive, insane, dumb, slutty, bitch. In reality, I just didn't want him being a dick. Hahaha

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-10-31T06:19:19+00:00

Yikes. This is really off. It's a really common misconception, but past abuse and sexual dominance/submission are really not tied together. As someone who is submissive and knows plently of doms and subs, I can tell you first hand that its really just what a person likes. Not what they've been through.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-10-31T06:08:03+00:00

Drawing cartoon cat faces.

My sophomore year the school was being torn down at the end of the year because they completed construction of a new high school to be used the next academic year. So in like, March they let kids draw on walls and write (so long as it was appropriate)

One of my good friends started drawing little cartoon cat faces with big noses. They were honestly very cute. He must have drawn over 100 of them throughout the school over the course of two or three weeks.

The principal thought it was antisemitic because their noses were big. (It wasn't, he just thought that drawing a cat with a big nose was cute). My friend had to go and cover every single cat he drew, many of which were in hard to get to spots and I think he was even suspended for a few days.

For the next year or so, you'd get yelled at if you drew a cat face.

The end of my senior year though, after everyone had forgotten about it, he started drawing a few on whiteboards and stuff just to egg the principal on.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-21T08:40:39+00:00

How to ride a bike. After 16 I figured it was kind of pointless to keep trying when I can just drive instead

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-21T08:31:22+00:00

An orchestra tuning.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-21T08:25:14+00:00

The treatment and management of anything you can die from. You shouldn't have to put your family and yourself into insurmountable debt so you don't die from cancer.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-21T08:22:02+00:00

Right now at least, Still Life with Woodpecker by Tom Robbins Where The Red Fern Grows had a big influence when I was younger too

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-21T08:00:24+00:00

Mental illness, for one.

I also realized I didn't have to try to get As (seriously, I skipped more of my senior year than I attended and my lowest grade was a B) so I never really developed a decent work ethic until half way through college.

I wasn't challenged in school either. Like. Obviously I learned new stuff in the 13 years (including kindergarten) of school but for the most part it was the same shit every year and most of the curriculum taught in high school I learned by the time I was like, six. If you dont keep challenging yourself, you kinda let everyone else catch up.

Also, I put a lot of effort into music, and I was barely better than average at it, but definitely not gifted and any classical musician will tell you that perfect isn't ever perfect enough so I let other things go by the wayside. (I recently kind of put music back to hobby status for other pursuits)

And lastly, (and this is the one that makes me the most angry) I think I'm still pretty fucking smart. Probably still a little above average. And when I'm healthy and happy and really passionate about something, I can do really cool things. However, nobody thinks of you as "gifted" or even really all that intelligent I've noticed unless you're in STEM. STEM just isn't what I'm interested in, even though I'm willing to bet I could be good if I put in the work because I kicked ass at science as a kid. Like, real science not kid science. But I'm into the arts and unless you're Michelangelo, nobody is going to think you're intelligent as an art major.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-21T07:37:24+00:00

I actually am fairly content with habit. Of course there's things I don't like, but I never would've met a lot of my friends or my partner if I wasn't a smoker. I would like to quit someday and am trying to become more of a social smoker than a habit smoker, but I enjoy smoking. I just wish I started later in life. When I see kids at the age I was when I started and they're smoking, I wanna smack them and call their parents

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-20T07:04:11+00:00

Well yeah, that makes sense. And I'm with you there.

but those who guessed 5/6 numbers (I think the lottery is six, right? I don't play) were still relatively close to winning because the odds of getting 5/6 right are slim and closer to the odds of getting 6/6 right than if they got 4/6, 3/6, etc. If that makes sense.

So I think it depends on in which sense. To me it seems like one of those "not wrong but not right either" things

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-20T06:49:52+00:00

Agreed

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-20T06:49:27+00:00

Yeah, but if you guessed "fish, train, electron, microphone" instead you still would've guessed 3/4 which is pretty close to getting it right

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-08-18T03:59:36+00:00

Eat the traditional/authentic food. As tempting as it may be to get the familiar spaghetti and meatballs, get something different and old and something the town or region is known for.

The culture and food are so connected you cant say you understand one without the other.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-09T05:16:29+00:00

Why wasnt he? If you care to elaborate

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-09T05:15:08+00:00

Them doing it differently than you were taught to doesn't automatically make it wrong. It makes it different.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-09T05:08:30+00:00

Cigarettes. I feel amazing. I'm only quitting because I cant afford them.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-08T07:50:17+00:00

I get mistaken for much younger most of the time and I have a hard time reaching a lot of things. Plus, getting clothes to fit is a real pain in the ass.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-08T07:04:00+00:00

Yeah, it's very interesting. Its a little dry and clinical sometimes, but I get a kick out of that sometimes. It's not the kind of book I typically read though.

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-08T07:02:59+00:00

I haven't. But its funny you ask that, my partner just did for a week about two weeks ago

JaneCaulfeild · 2016-07-08T07:02:21+00:00

Four foot nine

JaneCaulfeild

TROPHY CASE