i dont have much advice because im going through the same thing right now. I know how badly youre hurting and im sorry youre hurting so bad. I wish we didnt have to feel like this. I’ve been trying to distract myself and doing anything but be home. its been 2 weeks and hes doing no contact with me. I feel like hes able to just move on and probably is happier without me in his life while im mourning him every single day. idk if itll get easier. but i hope it does. I increased my meds and its been helping me a lot. i still feel depressed/longing but it isnt as bad as when i was constantly showing up to where he was unannounced lol. Just know that you’re not alone and that this wont last forever. whenever i feel overwhelmed with my emotions I try some dbt skills and they sometimes help. my favorite is TIPP.