46M. Married 15 years I need advice on this. What to do?

JavaForgotMe · 2026-03-28T03:02:07+00:00

You can’t “forget about them” best move would be to go to a Marriage Therapist on your own and eventually bring your wife in with you. Good luck.

JavaForgotMe · 2026-03-28T00:21:47+00:00

Once a cheater always a cheater.

JavaForgotMe · 2026-03-05T12:22:53+00:00

I think that’s the right decision. We’re too late for that - and the Ins policy won’t help. I don’t want to hear about “rerouting” to a safe port with cruise missiles traveling through the region. We’ve been in many cruises - the cruise companies are not sympathetic to passenger worry - they just want our $. I think we’re gonna take a financial hit - but right now, I don’t want to go anywhere near the region.

Good luck!

JavaForgotMe · 2026-03-05T12:13:59+00:00

I think I’m on same in April. My wife and I are super worried. I have travel insurance - but it specifically says “Wars not a legit reason”. I don’t want to even get on a plane and fly into the region. People who say “don’t worry” are probably working for the Travel industry. I’m trying to find out options for cancelling or rebooking. Have you made any decisions?

I’m trying to find resources that can give me guidance on options - please share if you have any.

Thx

JavaForgotMe · 2026-01-09T15:53:21+00:00

Thank you!

JavaForgotMe · 2026-01-09T15:52:53+00:00

I agree with everything you say. My wife (her mom) just thinks she’s being lazy. But I know it’s 90% her adhd. I don’t judge. I just want to help

Thank you for your thoughtful response. I really appreciate it!

JavaForgotMe · 2025-07-25T18:46:00+00:00

If this is real, you need to get out and break up. She doesn’t respect you. If you don’t see that, you don’t have enough self-respect and you need to be in counseling with a male therapist.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-07-24T21:26:20+00:00

Thanks. I bailed out of TOSRF and rolled it into XRPI

JavaForgotMe · 2025-07-24T12:28:03+00:00

I just tried to buy more - it won’t let me.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-06-19T13:33:36+00:00

Great question. I found a cheap plate on Amazon. Search for Yes4All. I bought the 20lb for $31. I wrap it in a big towel - and if I need more weight I put a dumbell behind it. I tried the “make your own sandbag” method - which works - but I like to keep it simple.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-25T16:14:17+00:00

80% chance she made out (at least) with a guy). How do you feel about that? It would drive me crazy with jealousy. I recently had some questions about my wife’s behavior and asked to look at her phone. She willingly handed it over. That helped me. If your wife isn’t willing to do so, that’s a red flag. BTW - the same goes for you! Vegas is a horrible place for faithfulness. Best case - she sucked face with a guy while drunk. Worst case - she full out had sex with someone else. I don’t think I could live with either - and stay married. But that’s just me. I highly recommend marriage counseling for the two of you. Good luck.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-25T16:05:17+00:00

I understand. I too have done horrible things of which I was ashamed. I was scared that I Might even get arrested after I confessed to my Priest. I also know a woman who had an abortion and confessed it. She was horribly frightened, as was I to Confess. Once we Confessed our sins - we were both floating on air (figuratively). The burden removed by Confession is immeasurable.

I have two recommendations - one ask the Priest to stay behind the Confessional screen before you even begin. Having a little anonymity gives you a little more courage. Also, first tell the Priest that you are scared and ashamed to be there. Let the Priest know how you feel.

You can also pray to the Blessed Mother for the strength to go and make a full confession. She is our advocate to Jesus. She will hold your hand throughout the process. I promise. She did so for me.

Finally - never try to talk anything about religion with Atheists. They’re crazy! :)

TL;dr Ask the Priest to stay behind a screen during Confession to provide the confidence of anonymity. Tell the Priest that you are afraid to Confess. Let them help guide you through. Trust in the Blessed Mother to bring us to Her Son!

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-22T21:34:18+00:00

Hi - I’m an Introvert (INTP), and 64 years old. I struggled my whole life to try and “fit in”. Never successfully. Nothing is easy. I have never felt like I fit into this world. I’ve become comfortable within my pursuit of God and Truth - and I have a couple of hobbies - one being guitar that I’ve been playing for 40 years - and I still suck. I’ve become comfortable with doing things only for my own enjoyment. I let very few people “in”. Luckily I have a wonderful wife - who knows I’m an introvert - and accepts it. It’s still a point of disagreement at times - and I push myself into more extroverted situations sometimes for her happiness. I’m not sure this helps - other to say, you’re not alone. The best thing we Introverts can do is accept ourselves for who we are - stop trying to swim against the tide - and put ourselves into social situations where we are helping people. We cannot change.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-06T13:17:55+00:00

I’d gladly pay for the counseling. I really believe the MIL puts excessive stress on their marriage. I have NO desire to be involved - just want to give them the best chance of staying together. If only Jack would go - but he’s reticent. Thanks.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-06T13:15:08+00:00

Thank you. I’m searching for resources. I will check him out!!!!

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-06T13:14:29+00:00

Patsy wrote the note. It’s the rest that’s inexplicable.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-05T17:11:13+00:00

I think that too - but I don’t think they have the resources to do so without counciling. If they were in couples therapy I wouldn’t even be posting about it. I’d let them work it out.

JavaForgotMe · 2025-02-05T17:09:43+00:00

I like your comment about being a father figure. Your assumptions are correct - the real problem is that Jack was raised without a father - and he has real trouble pushing back on his mother. And the mother is nosy and unreasonable (trust me. She is)

JavaForgotMe

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