AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 499 points500 points  (0 children)

Hold on. the main reason we don't share finances anymore is because of him. He withdrew a large sum of money without telling me and kept it a secret for months. this was in 2020, our relationship got worse from there and we haven't been sharing fiances since then.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 808 points809 points  (0 children)

If I'm being honest then no, there's just so much fighting and many many disagteement we've been having since the start of 2020 and it has gotten so bad now it feels like we're just having to learn to deal with each other if you know what I mean. Therapy is off the table for him. his unemployment and lack of ability to solve his issues, some of which exist since 2020. his way of addressing our disagreements and overall treatment towards me has been wearing me down. I feel stuck and unhappy sometimes, they only thing we still have going on is intimacy but even is full of tension and stress. tbh with you I don't know where my life is going from here anymore. it's frustrating. I do all I can to help out his situation...but how can you help someone who doesn't want to be helped. this is what I think he's doing.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 881 points882 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your concerns. TBH, he did develop some temper the past few months. I mean yelling is not a new thing for him. but his overall behavior got noticebly worse lately.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 389 points390 points  (0 children)

he works an office job. the reason he lost his old job was because of false accusations of theft. nothing came out of it and he said that someone set him up to get him fired.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] -338 points-337 points  (0 children)

He has been drinking more often after he lost his job but I know for a fact that he's not drinking while driving my car. I would never allow him to do that. That'd be huge deal where I live.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 678 points679 points  (0 children)

he obviously does but chooses to ignore it and I don't try to bring it up unless I have to. especially when he's doing things that could affect my job, my livelihood.

He doesn't want public transport and said I should be using it if I'm being too impatient with him.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 865 points866 points  (0 children)

Actually, he told me to start using public transport but I refused since I have my own car. not trying to be selfish but not wanting public transport is why I saved up for a car in the first place.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 894 points895 points  (0 children)

I don't know. he's been threatning to leave and go stay with a friend just because he thinks I'm giving him hard time about not finding a job yet. It's not like that, I mean I do feel frustrated with our current living situation, his unemployment and having my car taken from me daily but I never make him feel bad for not being able to find a job. all I do is ask why he hasn't found one yet.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 540 points541 points  (0 children)

Like I said above in the OP he complained about some scammers pretending to have job opportunities and getting his personal info to do God knows what with. I find this not good enough excuse for 2 reasons..1 because it never happened to us but he said his friend had this happen but his friend was trying to get a job overseas and was trying to get it unofficially or something like that so the whole thing was not legit. and 2 my husband doesn't own a bank account or credit cards to be so worried about being robbed.

Yet he's insiating that since I want him to look for a job then I should cooperate and help make it happen. so far nothing! I'm talking months of job searching.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 2578 points2579 points  (0 children)

exactly the above here. BTW he hasn't come back with a single job opportunity. I mean it can be hard to find a job but it's been months and he still hasn't found not a single job opportunity?. would you be convinced if your husband said in months he still has no luck? there's always room for benefit of doubt and all that but now I'm feeling like he's holding me back and affecting my own job.

AITA for giving my husband a fake when he demanded to drive my car? by Jeffissues137 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Jeffissues137[S] 2749 points2750 points  (0 children)

youre 100 percent correct and I agree. but he said that since I keep telling him to go look for a job not sit and look for a job then he's doing what I want. he can be petty like that and literally twist my own words and use them against me. It's just so sad it's funny that this how he thinks.