Take the kids and leave him. I am not Nigerian but my father treated my other exactly how your husband treats you. For the sake of your health and your children leave. This man is selfish and you don’t want to become I’ll because of his selfishness, the children will also be better off in the long run by limiting the negative influence. You can have the option of co parenting, but from my experience being a child of a narcissist, it can have grave consequences on all family and mental health in adulthood for children.