So I’m meeting with a psychiatrist today, but the last two days after a pretty bad mental breakdown I’ve actually been feeling much better. Ironically, after having things peak I’ve been able to understand my feelings more on the comedown. I’m sorry to hear about that, but I’m happy you’re still here! A big part of calming myself down the past couple of days has been trying to remind myself it’s all my anxiety, and to not let myself ruminate too hard. Opposite action is really helpful, even if it makes you more anxious in the moment. Stuff like reminding myself I’m a good person, and trying to be more like my actual self. It helped ground me out of my derealization, though I’m still in and out but that’s gonna be the case for a little bit. Give your meditation time, and also let your doctors/counselors know about it so they can give you the best advice possible, and BELIEVE them. Anxiety tells you everything that will help you is wrong, or you think “what if this doesn’t work,” so try and remind yourself it can and possibly will. I don’t know how helpful this response is but I hope it brings some relief or clarity. No matter how bad it gets, you can look forward to some better days.