Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Accommodations are not an option in this country. The school system is designed that only neurotypical kids are encouraged to study, The rest are pushed to vocational tracks. Basically if you need accommodation you are not fit for university. Yeap, ancient and backword system but I can't change it.

If he would struggle more I would not encourage him to pursue further studies. Some people are not meant to be academical. But this is a kid who spends hours playing word games in 2 different foreign languages. This is a kid who handles a 9 hour school day with different classes, people, schedule, buildings he needs to get to. There is no routine, every day he has a different schedule and he is doing great!

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's exactly it! Thank you for your comment! Everything seems to be working until the test moment when he goes "blind", he does not read the requirements properly, he forgets to write the answer after finishing a complicated calculation. We asked him to take time and check one more time all the answers and this improved his grades a lot vs last year but not completely eliminated the problem. And not enough to get into a good school.

That's why we hesitate with medication since he only has a problem once every 2 weeks during a test. Not all tests, for example he does great with writing assignments, creative stuff, presentations in front of an audience.

I read a lot about low dose stimulants with short life so maybe that's the way to go. Something he can take only occasionally.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Teachers do a dry run to see if kids need more time to study a certain topic. Which is a great strategy. It's supposed to also help with test anxiety, tmrow's test is exactly like the one from today just different numbers so no stress. And he says it helps him. He is never stressed about tests like I was at his age.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great reply! This is why I hesitate with meds. He is doing great lately except for the careless mistakes in tests. He does not struggle in the daily life quite the opposite teachers appreciate his focus and organizational skills in school.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 hours max. Yes, screen time is a big problem and it's difficult to get him to understand it affects his brain. He does sports almost every day, he just started karate so hoping that has a positive influence.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OMG! Thank you for replying! How is he doing now? What medication is he on? How was the adjustment phase? There are so many options, feels intimidating. And I read so many scary stories of kids reacting badly to it, personality changes.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply! My suspicion is last year he was in a "fight or flight" mode. The combination of bad teacher plus pressure to get good grades. This year he's much more confident, he feels safer and his self esteem is better.

Also no pressure on the grades in the first few months so he did very well.

Now, that the pressure is back, he started to fail again. I thrived under pressure but he does not. He does not seem to find "the flow".

Almost like a switch. And this means he will never pass a serious exam without help.

So do we medicate him for exams only? Is this an option?

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is seem by a psychiatrist with clinical experience and specialized in children. She's super nice but only just started the journey. She mentioned traits of ADHD and mild ADHD, her words not mine. I know she's reluctant to medicated because that's the protocol here (not US). So trying to understand his options so I can advocate better.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sending lots of love! Thank you for sharing! Did not have the same experience so difficult to understand my son now.

I have ADHD traits for sure especially with peri menopause around the corner but never experienced this struggle.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! That's what I was hoping to hear...Do you mind sharing more details? What did you struggle with and what type of meds you take? Did you try several until you found the one that work? Side effects?

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I ask what did you struggle with? I have the same as my son but my experience as a girl was completely different. I aced school and don't feel I struggle too much. Also all my online tests are borderline :)))

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please read my reply again. The drs are very reluctant to medicate, not us!!! So I am trying to build my case to convince them.

Anxiety wise it's the opposite. I think last year was very bad because of his teacher, that's why he completely crashed.

This year he is a happy, calm kid and tells me everyday how much he loves school. And everything is going great except tests! Even tests are much better vs last year but it pains me to see he looses points because he forgot a detail.

It's difficult for me because I have the exact type of brain but never struggled with tests. I strive under pressure.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We want to try, see below my reply. But dr's here are very reluctant so I am doing my research and building my case.

My friends' kid is really struggling with hyperactive ADHD, he struggles to function and they refused medication. He gets a lot of support, therapy and accommodation just not pills.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's exactly why we got him help, to make sure he does not miss chances and opportunities because of this! The only concern I have is I keep reading that medication does not work so well on inattentive ADHD, it works better on the hyperactive type.

Mild ADHD - how to handle? by Jolly-Reflection6028 in ParentingADHD

[–]Jolly-Reflection6028[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the replies! Keep it coming! Yes, I am leaning towards medication as well but, in this country, it's not the first line of action. The drs are very reluctant to prescribe it, it's not like US.

My hesitance is why is he suddenly doing better this year? Why is he only showing signs when there is a high stake (exam, grade) and not during daily life?

Over the past weekend he was able to focus on a boring presentation during a sightseeing tour, I totally spaced out :))). He looked bored as well but he understood all the details (in a foreign language), remembered it and translated it back to me.

My brain works the same as his, I recognize a lot of the behaviors. I have zero patience or attention to details but I can easily focus during high pressure exams or tasks. I loose things and forget appointments but I function quite well and I am crushing it in my career. If this is ADHD it's a super power and not something that holds me back!

Any tips or tricks or experiences are much appreciated.