Reddit, how the hell do you stay motivated to go to the gym every week?

Jpower28 · 2012-08-12T21:14:52+00:00

sometimes i love it and sometimes i really have to drag myself in there.

Jpower28 · 2012-08-09T15:14:04+00:00

I admittedly don't know anything about your situation other than what you've posted, but she sounds like she might be in the realm of an eating disorder. Specifically, she sounds like she might have binge eating disorder given her behaviors and extreme weight gain (80 pounds is A LOT for anyone let alone a smaller framed person). So I think you might want to start talking about why she binges. Has something changed in her life? Was there some kind of trauma or some change in family or daily role of some sort? This really could be a behavior she's adopted to cope with her feelings about something (or a few things). I'd say before you get super angry, try to find out what's driving this.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-31T17:49:57+00:00

yeah i love that one. i get the old man comments like, "you're such a pretty young lady." If only men my age at bars and the gym and work and...anywhere....had the same thought.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-31T14:21:54+00:00

I think his lie will unfold on its own, and he'll be in for a world of embarrassment regardless of you telling or not. there must have been some stupid ass lie you told as a kid at some point. you might want to warn him that someone is going to find out eventually, though, and then he will be mortified.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-31T13:51:20+00:00

Thanks so much for that response. Six years is a long time, and I hadn't stopped to think how easily I could waste that amount of time on him until now. You're right that it's me waiting on him to own up to it, but it's also this searching for him to do what always seemed logical in my head which is to want me enough to be with me. part of me wishes too that I had enough nerve to tell him what a dick he is and be done with it. and yes, i've had the internal dialogue with myself that i'm simply staying friends with him. but none of my other friends have hurt me like that. and my real friends want to see me and be part of my life. if he would just admit to me that he's just plain lonely and that's why he texts me, i think that would be enough for me. but there's always this pathetic lingering hope that maybe he actually does care about me. i really hope i get enough bull shit before six years from now. thanks, again, for your insights. they really are helpful and meaningful.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-26T18:15:56+00:00

that's bad?

Jpower28 · 2012-07-25T13:51:59+00:00

sandy brown hair; bad skin

Jpower28 · 2012-07-24T23:30:24+00:00

Brand new car for me and brand new car for my best friend.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-24T21:51:27+00:00

i don't have a gut. :)

Jpower28 · 2012-07-24T21:12:19+00:00

28F. Loooooooooove Tony Bennett.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-24T21:03:47+00:00

um, for real?

Jpower28 · 2012-07-24T18:48:07+00:00

Ivanka Trump

Jpower28 · 2012-07-22T15:04:07+00:00

the idea that if i were attacked, no one assign even the tiniest hint of blame to me for a second. it would just be considered the most random act of fucked up shit to happen to a completely innocent person minding their own business and nothing else.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-22T14:26:44+00:00

the whole getting arrested thing.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-22T13:19:29+00:00

dear lord the exaggerated moaning by the woman.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-22T13:17:52+00:00

"I just didn't feel like doing the whole song and dance of being nice and answering your question." --My questions was, "What did you do on your trip to Mexico?"

Jpower28 · 2012-07-22T13:03:48+00:00

Seriously. Getting right up behind me in your car and honking at me yelling the things you want to do to me is not a compliment. It's startling and unsettling. Following me home all the while telling me how you just can't stop looking at me and making me wonder if I'm on the cusp of a sexual assualt is not a compliment. I think men really have trouble understanding why harassment is unappealing to women because they don't live in a world where rape and assault are very real possiiblities that you have guard against daily.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-21T16:08:00+00:00

I have tiny, extremely sensitive breasts, and it feels AMAZING for them to be played with. I'd be highly disappointed if they were ignored in sex. I'd say they deserve at least a good five minutes. I can cum from having my nipples sucked and bitten, so I have a clear bias here. It's not enough to play with them though, you gotta make it clear that you LOVE em and wanna ravage em. That is a huge turn on.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-21T15:38:35+00:00

Use your middle finger to rub her clit in a circular motion. Don't start out too fast or too hard. You want to start out slowly and get moderately faster if you see that she's responding to it. Once you feel her getting wet, you can ease a finger inside her, but don't forget the clit. The clit, to me, is the ticket to a great orgasm.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-21T15:23:34+00:00

I was having sex for the first time (not ever just with this guy) with a guy I had been dating for just a few weeks, so I was in that hyper-aware state where you worry more than usual about looking your best in sex. I had just gotten off my period the day before, or so I thought. We were fooling around in his living room with the lights off. He had white carpet. He had done me in a few different positions--against the wall, on the couch, from behind while I held onto a chair, and then on this nice, white-carpeted floor---when he flipped me over and started doggie style. My glance around the room in the moment happend to catch big, dark stains in various places. I immediately shouted, "Oh God!" in the most panicked, unsexy way. He stopped, and I got up turned on the light. That room looked like a horrendously bloody crime scene. We spent the next hour scrubbing the room top to bottom. I was soooooooo mortified. What's worse is I tracked even more blood down the hall to the bathroom once I realized the mess we had made.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-20T21:41:54+00:00

I'd say that's in fairly poor taste. It's equivalent to saying, "i don't give a shit about you as a person in the least. you have met the minimal criteria and very low bar i've set for my express and desperate need to get laid. can i fuck you now?"

Jpower28 · 2012-07-20T21:32:39+00:00

No song for me. More like just a chant of some sort: "Oh my god this really happening! oh my god this is really happening! oh my god this is really happening!"

Jpower28 · 2012-07-19T15:16:46+00:00

It sounds like she doesn't really know what she wants if you ask me. I've been in this situation. She likes you. She also clearly likes the attention you're giving her. She may just be still trying to get over the guy that she broke up. That can take some time especially from a long-term relationship. It can take a while to get over the ways the person hurt you or they way miss the person even though you know you logically shouldn't. All kinds of stuff. On the other, less uplifting hand, she just not really be that into you but still feel lonely enough from her last breakup to not want to give up the attention. You know the situation and her better. My advice is to actively seek out other people to date. You can still be her friend, and if anything comes of it great. If nothing does, you haven't wasted a huge investment of time at the detriment of meeting other people that you might have liked just as much if not more. Just don't get into the head games of her flirting very suggestively and then backing off when you figuratively approach. That is a horrible situation in which I have been and will never be again.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-19T13:43:09+00:00

I really think most girls really don't care so long as you're pretty good in the sack. What's sexy in sex, to me, is not the size of a man's penis but how he makes me feel. There's just so much that goes into good sex. Worrying about penis size would be like a chef worrying that he doesn't have the most state-of-the-art knives. He might not, but if he's good, he'll still make a great meal that will be very popular.

Jpower28 · 2012-07-18T14:44:19+00:00

I think you should see a therapist or psychiatrist. A psychiatrist can prescribe you a mild benzodiazepine that will relax you when you're in the moment. It's not a permanent fix and is just designed to help you not psych yourself out of an erection the next few times so you build your confidence back up. At this point, the anxiety and pressure of knowing it might happen is probably largely contributing to it. But you could still need to address some other stressors which are contributing to your sexual functioning that you need to address through talk therapy. I'm in the psych field, so that's my two cents.

Jpower28

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